It's Wednesday, so it's time for episode two. I honestly might speed these updates up, as I have (more than) enough free time to do more than three episodes a week. I'll do it if you readers want me too, I guess. No real strain on my part, as I'm enjoying this. Anyways, on to the second episode.
Episode Two: Are We Becoming One (alright, kinda sexual, but not much)
It starts out with two people on a motorcycle, driving down an empty road. The driver pulls a fast turn, and they go onto a bridge and stop. Hey look, people. The passenger on the bile is revealed to be a blonde loli, with a somewhat unnerving voice. Notably, her ass REALLY sticks out. Seriously, just look at it! It's huge! Then again, this is high school, so okay, Willing Suspension of Disbelief
here, I guess a highschooler could have an ass that... pronounced. Anyways, her apparent brother runs off to deal drugs or have group sex or something that crazy biker gangs do, and the new girl looks around, and summons the OP.
A short skip later, and...
Kouta is being sexually assaulted again, not that it could be called that given what happened last episode, but whatever. I get it, Kanokon, Chizuru's breasts are pretty big. Kouta is completely in denial, though. He knows he wants her boobs oh so badly, but refuses to admit it. Kind of interesting, actually. This (romantic comedy/possible harem) show is unique in that the main love interest and shota protagonist are "close" at the beginning of the series.
Back to the show, Chizuru thinks shota-kun is getting tired of her boobs (ahahahaha!) and so decides to flash her panties at him and suggest that they do it in the road. Kouta does not approve, adn runs off, winding up at the family planning centre. Naturally, a place Chizuru would want him to visit with her.
In a sprawling magical market district, lolitass devours ribs. Symbolism!? Actually, I think she's eating them so that the protein goes to her ass. As expected, Kouta shows up there as well. The hell is with that girl and ribs, honestly?
"do you understandu!?" Ah, great Engrish there. Thanks, random ribs guy. You need your own show. Shota-kun notices lolitass, mentioning that she looks like a foreigner, and thinks that "She's likely a..." Prostitute! Ass monger! Character from some other anime! Do I get multiple guesses!? Damn, she likes them ribs. Yum Yum
. Why doesn't the salesbro just stop her, and why does he have so many ribs just out in the open? What kind of economy is this!?
Kouta comes to the conclusion that she's a kitsune or something like Chizuru because the plot tells him to (honestly, he just up and thinks that. How the hell would he know that so intuitively?). Kouta offers to pay a whole 8000 yen, but Lolitass pulls out 10000 and gives it so salesbro, who revealed just earlier that he has a starving wife and kid. Directors, this guy needs his own show, ASAP. I'm sure it's be like Cowboy Bebop
meets Hayate No Gokuto
Back to the show, Lolitass reveals her name to be "Nozomu. Ezomori Nozomu.", but I don't care. I had to go back and look at the exact subtitle to remember that. After telling him her name and him asking if she's a "spi-" (der?), she slams her meat down his throat as a token of gratitude. Apparently he helped her, possibly in some vaguely sexual way. She then sniffs him, and runs off. Great going, Lolitass!
Later that night... Kouta is in bed, wondering about this new girl and thinking if she takes it in the back door. Also he thinks about her being a spirit, a fact he is absolutely certain is true, for whatever reason. I guess the sniffing helped. And, guess who's standing outside his window?
Shota-kun is awakened by the absolutely terrifying sight of Chizuru's chest. He fails his Will save against fright, and screams like a little girl. With his eyes closed. I guess it helps that she may or may not have molested him in his sleep. Naturally, her nightclothes are ridiculously Stripperiffic
. She's really abusing her magical super duper spirit powers.
In the morning, on the way to school, Chizuru offers up the awesome metaphor of, "A boy is a key, and a girl is a keyhole!... Open my door whenver you feel like it.". This is actually pretty hilariously awesome. Also, Kouta again displays his allergy to sex when Chizuru, again, flashes him. His plot fails, as his hands slip into a rather... unfortunate position. Unfortunate from his POV, that is. Chizuru falls on him, but succeeds an intense Balance check and they avoid falling on top of each other, mostly. At least they didn't fall into a heap and in an even more awkward position. In her endless attempts to get in his pants, she magically wards off the area so that they can privately have sex there.
At the last moment, Lolitass passes through, and destroys the magic ward, leaving Chizuru bare to public scrutiny. Oddly enough, absolutely everyone on the street is female, besides Shouta. Only a few possibly male subjects are shown when the camera zooms out. Suddenly, the tsundere bitch girl appears, with what seems to be the entire female cast besides Lolitass. As usual, annoying tsundere reaction follow. The lesbians are surprisingly deadpan about the whole situation, though.
One cheap still shot later...
The twins are organizing flowers or some crap. Go, organize those flowers or some crap! The more feminine half of the lesbian couple gives us the gem of, "I may get pregnant if I get too close to him." Luckily, Chizuru's chest comes to defend shota-kun's honour. The twins couldn't care less, they're awesome like that. Chizuru offers up a pretty solid defense, simply noting that Kouta hasn't looked at any girls other than her. As unexpected, Lolitass comes out of nowhere and pounces on him. She's got awesome timing, I'll give her that. Chizuru is not amused. Not at all
The two girls' brilliant plan is for both of them to get on top of him, completely smothering the poor shota. The twins only do whatever they're doing with the flowers faster. Laid-back dude, who looks like that one guy from The Girl Who Leapt Through Time
arrives, and is somewhat surprised my the situation. That is magically cleaned up in a transition, and everyone is now in their seats. The absurdly young looking teacher introduces Lolitass, but I didn't care to remember her name this time either. The various students gossip that she's his illegitimate child, which, besides making no goddamn sense whatsoever, makes no goddamn sense whatsoever. A guy sitting next to Kouta is forced (maybe seduced?) out of his seat by the lady with the sizeable rear compartment, and she proceeds to move awkwardly close to our pitiable protagonist. And then hugs him. Th' teach don't care, y'hear?
In Gauron's office, Chizuru is tied up, which is somewhat unnerving given the inherent creepiness of the guy. Luckily, he happens to have a knowledge of what this new girl is, and explains to the audience and Chizuru. She's a wolf! This news so greatly shocks Chizuru that she does another fancy acrobatic move thing and escapes her bondage chair.
In the outside world, Kouta is again being clung on to, and he reveals that he somehow knew that Lolitass is a wolf. Great, now we've just got to encounter a cougar. Why does this girl like him so much? Well, actually, it's not explained why Chizuru is infatuated with him, so who really cares. She manages to jump out of the way before Kouta is hit in the side of the head by a flying garbage can. The crazy banjo-ish battle music starts again. Chizuru is noted by a large text sign that she, indeed, threw the garbage can.
Meanwhile, in the Bat-Tub...
Kouta is lying around in his conveniently spacious hot tub, again wondering if Lolitass would approve of doggy style. Also he thinks about how to iron it out with Chizuru, who again sneaks in to join him. She believes that if they have some form of physical contact that her rival will leave this shota alone. Wait, what?
Lolitass then barges in, all her loli assets open for the other two to see. Chizuru just got owned in the seduction department, it seems. Chizuru strips out of the bath and gets into a name-calling and fanservicing battle with Lolitass, who is unfortunately facing the wrong direction. I'm surprised that Kouta hasn't had a nosebleed yet.
However, his erotic senses are being completely overwhelmed by the sight before his eyes. A sexy naked catfight! Yay! Somewhat ironically to me, Lolitass calls Chizuru "Pork buns". Ahahahaha look who's talking. Then the two girls turn to Kouta to ask him if he is a man who likes his milkbags or DFC. Finally, his nose can no longer hold out, and the water turns a murky red. They pretty much killed him.
Footsteps are accompanied by a still frame showing that it is now school time. Surprisingly, when Kouta talks about a cold due to a rush of blood to the head, that annoying tsundere girl, whom he is talking to, doesn't take it sexually at all. Let's hope she continues to get better. Instead, she suggests he go to the infirmary. That's definitely not going to end well.
"Finally, I can sleep in peace." Laying on a tranquil green field, shota-kun is finally free. Then BAM! He grabs a hold of Chizuru's mighty mammaries, then grabs some air where a certain loli's chest should be. For some reason, he is surprised by the fact that the two horndogs have joined him in his bed. He is, again, surprised by the fact that a tsundere walks in on them. He should really just make up his mind and get this over with. The sheer sex knocks Kouta unconscious, and the ED rolls.
Next episode promises food and erotic hide-and-seek. Yay! Be sure to check up Friday, or tell me if you want me to post more.
edited 29th Jul '10 11:54:31 AM by Five_X