There were a bunch of characters I've made for D&D 3.5, and never had a chance to use.
Let's see. There was Citizen Snips, a crawdad druid. He was named after a crab on Futurama. His backstory was that he had been awakened by a stoned druid with the vermin lord feat from one of the Eberron books, and started taking class levels and adventuring after a catfish ate 27 of his forty brothers and sisters. He had a class subtitution that gave him a water elemental in place of an animal companion, and let the water elemental walk around on land as he rode in it's torso.
Then there was I.R. Warbot. He was a warforged Warlock. He was based on a character from 8 Bit Theatre; he wore a fake mustache, claimed to be human, and if you called him on it, he'd invite you to "feel his human laser!". The way I was going to play him, he'd carry around a potted tree ("To produce the oxygen I need for human respiration") and wore pants ("To cover my human genitalia"); and all of his warlock abilities would be devices built into his system (Devil's Sight is infared vision, Eldritch Blast is a laser, Fell Flight is an integrated jetpack).
Big Serge was a half giant fighter. Through a combination of feats, weapon mods, and the Powerful Build racial ability, I was going to have him wielding what were essentially a pair of Buster Swords. Not really effective, but Rule of Cool. The joke with him was that he was quite erudite and rediculously intelligent, but looked savage and had an... intense personality. A typical Serge-ism would be, upon being shown a document, roaring "SERGE CANNOT READ!" at the top of his lungs, before ammending "...without his glasses.", then putting them on and reading it.
"G.T. Sharp" was another character I wanted to play, but no DM would let me. His backstory was that he had been transported from the modern world to that of the campaign, and was adventuring to try to get home. He used pistols, for which he crafted his own ammo, and would eventually have heavily enchanted. Eventually he would pick up a Rod of Many Wands, modeled after the Caster from Outlaw Star, but not until very late game. No one would ever let me play a character with guns, which was frustrating; not because he would be overpowered (trust me, he didn't come close), but because no one would let me play something so anachronistic. For me, the anachronism was what made the character any fun, so I couldn't just swap out the guns for wands or self-loading hand crossbows or whatever. If I couldn't play a guy from Los Angeles who constantly bitched about being stuck in "the World of Freaking Warcraft" and confused the party with his demented ravings about "antibiotics" and "pasteurization", I didn't want to even play the build.
Finally, there was Yeshua. Yeshua was going to be a good aligned cleric of St. Cuthbert who took the leadership feat to gain 13 disciples. Mathew, Mark, Luke, John, Thomas... all the way down to Judas. He was going to have a lot of feats from the Book of Exalted Deeds, and wander around creating food and water for peasants and performing other assorted miracles. I came up with the character as a joke; one of the guys in our group was a Baptist, and in your face about it, but somewhat ignorant; didn't know that Yeshua was Jesus's real name, and was sure that he spoke latin. I was going to see how far I could go before he figured out who my character was an Expy of.
While I never really wanted to play as him all that badly, I have put some serious thought into how one would build Elric of Melnibone in 3.5. I figure he'd be a Battle Sorcerer from Unearthed Arcana, but I'm still hung up on how I would go about building Stormbringer.
edited 18th Aug '10 4:46:14 PM by disturbly
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