My god, its full of tropes....
- Yes, the Mi-Go are fungal creatures. No, athlete's foot powder does not do a damned thing against them.
- I cannot dual wield lightning guns.
- Tabula Rasa devices are complex memory erasing devices beyond mortal comprehension. I cannot just bean a target with it and expect it to work as advertised.
- Once my investigator goes permanently insane his insanity cannot be 'carry on as before' or 'has no fucks left to give'
Okay, I'll try it your way for once
crazies ( from rifts), insane investigators, and malkavians ( from Vampire: The Masquerade) can't justify out of character knowledge with any of the following
- Just thought it would work
- the voices in their head told them (may or may not work with malkavians)
- "well I don't see you coming up with ideas around here!"
edited 24th Jun '15 11:02:18 AM by Alucart23
Remember what we used to say? JACKPOT!
With Malks it does work, because sometimes their madness gives them a peculiar clarity.
![[up]](https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/smiles/arrow_up.png "[up]"){kind=icon}
The way we played it the voices in the Malks head were the players, and that's why he was so nuts. The fact that the Malk himself was also one of the voices in his head just seemed even more in character to us.
My god, its full of tropes....
- Even if it were a real, usable spell, shoggoths do not know Evan's Spiked Tentacles of Forced Intrusion.
- No Cuthulu mythos creature knows Evan's Spiked Tentacles of Forced Intrusion.
- If I am ever banished to another dimension in-game I cannot go and join the next table over's game of All Flesh Must Be Eaten, even if they are all cool with it, and play with them as my banished character until I am retrieved.
- Halflings do not taste like chicken, they taste like belly pork.
- Slaying dragons by redirecting them to halfling settlements and waiting for them to die from the cholesterol is ineffective, sociopathic, and an alignment check.
- I cannot justify anything with the words 'Trust me, I'm a scientist'.
- One, my character is not a scientist, nor a particularly good liar.
- Two, I am not a scientist myself (yet).
- I am to stop trying to tele-frag cultists by stuffing their heads in summoning circles at the moment of truth (Just breaks the circle apparently
).
- The chunky salsa rule has nothing to do with chips 'n' dip and it is wrong to tell the new guy it is.
- I have no choice over which dimension I dump my enemies in. This means I cannot send them to a specific children's TV program and expect them to die of type 42 diabetes on arrival.
- Even if I could, there is no point sending Matt (Notrealname) there. He'd enjoy it.
- There is also no point in sending Dave (Againnotrealname) either. He'd enjoy it too, for less wholesome reasons.
- Even if I could, there is no point sending Matt (Notrealname) there. He'd enjoy it.
i lol'd
Think of the mooks!
Hmm... if halflings taste like belly pork, and humans are called "long pig," does that make halflings "short pig"? And no, I'm not even sorry for that.
Also, dragons are well-known for their highly efficient digestive system, allowing them to use practically everything with almost no waste. I don't think dragons get heart disease. Ogres, on the other hand...
Reminder: Offscreen Villainy does not count towards Complete Monster.
My god, its full of tropes....
Yes, yes it does.
The fact that dragons have adamant stomachs is part of the reason it takes so long for them to die of heart disease. However, all that melt-in-the-mouth flesh and buttery fat can and will eventually cause cholesterol build up (lizards are capable of having cholesterol problems, trust me, I'm a student Food Scientist). Ogres can't even last a week on a halfling-only diet, their veins turn to butter.
Question not my madness, lest ye join me in it.
Think of the mooks!
Well, if we were talking about dinosaurs (roughly the size of some dragons, but without any magical properties inherently), sure, I could see them getting heart disease after a few decades of a halfling-only diet. But dragons are inherently magical with perhaps the most efficient digestive system in fantasy (second, maybe, only to the tarrasque). Simply put, dragons just don't get heart disease - they're too magical.
However, if you trapped a dragon in an antimagic field and gave them an all-halfling diet, then we could talk heart disease after maybe a century or two.
Reminder: Offscreen Villainy does not count towards Complete Monster.
Unless you pay a cancer mage a sum to inflict heart disease on said dragon.
Alternately, make an offering to Father Nurgle.
When talking to a group of dhampirs and the discussion turns to drinks, I am not allowed to make a crack about them not drinking wine.
Okay, I'll try it your way for once
when meeting a magical chicken farmer (a magical farmer who has a chicken farm, not a farmer who has magical chickens or is a chicken themself, regardless of whether the farmer is magical) I am not to ask if he uses the nestspresso to speed up the hatching.
nestspresso is from an snl skit that parodies coffee machines and chick hatching
edited 2nd Jul '15 3:56:39 PM by Alucart23
Remember what we used to say? JACKPOT!
My god, its full of tropes....
- As a GM I am not allowed to use my knowledge of player's favourite fandoms against them.
- As a player I am not allowed to use my knowledge of the GM's favourite fandoms to my advantage.
- I can only bring 'Argument popcorn' if I share with everyone.
Just a harmless giant from a foreign land.
Just because the other Wizard in the group is having a case of Crippling Overspecialization against Magic-Immune opponents I am not allowed to turn him into an Improvised Weapon for my Kung-Fu Wizard.
"You can reply to this Message!"
Trans Siberian Anarchestra (it/they)
Also, your base should go with the hydroponic greenhouse setup, just to be safe.
Okay, I'll try it your way for once
i can no longer kill my enemies by saying, "bang" even if my intimidation roll is enough to scare them to death.
Remember what we used to say? JACKPOT!
Talking Is a Free Action has reasonable limits.
Not allowed to intimidate someone with a long winded epic speech in combat.
Apocalypse: Dirge Of Swans.
Just a harmless giant from a foreign land.
*makes notes**looks at his +12 intimidate at level 2 samurai* *ahem*
My god, its full of tropes....
- Singing 'Trololololol' over and over to the tune of The Hall of the Mountain King is not an epic level Chaos magic spell in any system.
- Even if I do the dance/air conduction and get the rest of the table to join in.
- It may be used with the GM's prior permission if it couldn't possibly screw up the campaign any further.
- Even if I do the dance/air conduction and get the rest of the table to join in.
Okay, I'll try it your way for once
in settings before actual classifications for what counts as a nut, i am not allowed to call out any uses of the term nut that do not actually apply in real world logical terminology. damn you almonds!
Remember what we used to say? JACKPOT!
The Wildest of Ronins
I am no longer allowed to make overly complex punny names for backstory characters.
In this case, naming a Mad Scientist Dr. Truestone in the gothic horror setting of Ravenloft. Explaining the Joke
Click Click Boom Boom
Think of the mooks!
So, Dr. Francis Pierre is also right out?
Reminder: Offscreen Villainy does not count towards Complete Monster.
Some of these just seem like the G Ms being whiny, petulant children.
Think of the mooks!
To be fair, context matters. Some of the entries on here (at least, some of mine) aren't necessarily at-table hard-and-fast rules so much as admonishments on past incidents (for myself, I am in fact allowed to perform surgery in-game, in the right situations... I'm strongly discouraged from doing so frivolously, though). Also, several of the entries aren't rulings from the GM, but from the other players (the GM thinks the whole surgery escapade I did was hilarious... the other players are the ones who won't let me do surgery anymore).
That said, yeah, some of the stories do involve GMs with the proverbial 10-foot pole stored in their rectum. That said, I think we can all be mature and admit that at least a couple of incidents were the player's fault and threatened to sidetrack the whole shebang, and the GM makes the ruling so as to actually play the game.
Eh, nobody's perfect.
Reminder: Offscreen Villainy does not count towards Complete Monster.
No more fish assassination plots.
Got a degree in Emotional trauma via fictional characters aka creative writing. hosting S'mores party in Hell for fellow (evil) writers