Webcomic / Ask Her Lustrousness, Yellow Diamond

Ask Her Lustrousness, Yellow Diamond is a Steven Universe Fan Web Comic askblog by pixiedustandfairypowers.

Having started on August 8th, 2018, the premise is that the stories are focused on the Diamonds (but mainly Yellow Diamond) after a canon divergence following the episode "Familiar".

The webcomic can be read on tumblr and here on Tapas Media.

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Ask Her Lustrousness, Yellow Diamond provides examples of:

• Actually, I Am Him: When the leader of the assassin trio of the Thrupud king's legion demands for Steven to hand over the Kruvian queen in exchange for his cheeseburger backpack, Steven claims to know no such person, only for the alien he helped earlier confess that she is the true Kruvian queen.
• And Then What?: When Blue tries a donut:
  Bella: Now that you've put that thing in your body, you'll eventually have to expel it somehow and I am NOT going to stick around when that happens.
  Susan: Wait, then what am I supposed to do?!
  Bella: You figure that out yourself, Blue.
• Art Evolution: The comic gradually developed far more stable lineart and coloring, especially when compared to the first few strips.
• A Day in the Limelight: The storyline "Pearls' Day Out" focuses on Yellow Pearl and Blue Pearl being sent to Earth for 24 hours for a break by their respective Diamonds.
• Big Damn Kiss: After Steven comes back to life, Connie tackles him into a kiss that causes both of them to fall into Rose's fountain.
• Big "WHAT?!": Yellow Pearl yells this when her Diamond tells her that's now free from her duties.
• Breaking the Fourth Wall:
  • The first time it happens, Sardonyx suddenly appears to declare this certain fancomic non-canon.
  • A Sapphire and, later, Ruby lampshades that there won't be any foul language used because "the author of the comic dislikes profanity".
• Curse Cut Short: Parodied when a Ruby is about to suggest to her teammates that they fuse, Blue Diamond cuts her off, yelling at her not to say the 'F' word, prompting the Ruby to think that she's not allowed to swear.
• Didn't Think This Through: When Dewey suggests to Bella and Susan to eat a donut, Blue immediately goes through with it—with no clue on what happens next. She gets her rather squicky answer from Amethyst.
• Disapproving Look: Blue gives one to Yellow when calling her out about "getting flustered around humans".
• Disney Death: When Blue removes Stevens gem, the Crystal Gems try to fight her to get it back. It comes to a ceasefire when Connie yells out that's he's not breathing anymore. After she tearfully places his diamond back on his stomach, he's resurrected à la Beauty and the Beast.
• Driven to Suicide: Yellow has intentions to shatter herself with the Blade of the Fragmented Fissure after losing all hope. Luckily, her Pearl manages to save her from that fate.
• Dude, Where's My Respect?: Yellow Pearl complains that she gets no credit for her posing when Yellow Diamond compliments the new wallpaper for her computer terminal that Blue Pearl drew.
• Exhausted Eye Bags: A scene has Yellow ending up with these from emotional exhaustion.
• Explain, Explain... Oh, Crap!: Yellow Pearl reacts with horror after she inadvertently blurts out to Blue Pearl and Pearl that her Diamond has a secret weapon collection.
• Family-Unfriendly Violence:
  • Steven getting arrows through his ankles, prompting bleeding and a great deal of pain for him. He soon heals it with his spit, but still.
  • Mouthy getting shattered in full view of the readers and a devastated Steven.
• Fireball Eyeballs:
  • Yellow gains these when an anon points out that she always makes such funny faces.
  • Ruby gains these when arguing with Sapphire about helping the Diamonds with their new Fusion.
• Formula-Breaking Episode:
  • "The Welcome Home Party" is entirely a written story with a few drawings splashed in.
  • Steven's death and resurrection both come in the form of animated comics.
• Hugh Mann: Yellow Diamond and Blue Diamond first disguise themselves as humans (under the aliases "Bella Azula" and "Susan Azula" respectively) in order to safely visit Earth and understand the meaning of Steven's birthday. Even though they end up blowing their covers right in front of Greg, they really don't end up in any actual problems despite some awkwardness with the Beach City citizens here and there.
• Gravity Sucks: When travelling to a planet with stronger gravity and air pressure, Steven finds it a tad hard to breathe and float.
• Hypocrite: Blue and Yellow get into an argument when Blue accuses Yellow of shirking her work (she was only stranded on Earth), something that Yellow points out that she's been doing this whole time.
• Hypocritical Humor:
  • In an early strip, after Yellow Pearl boasts that her Diamond doesn't waste time on "silly and inefficient pursuits", she then proclaims that she must take 46th selfie of the day. Cue facepalm from Yellow Diamond.
  • Pearl calls out Yellow Pearl and Blue Pearl for being so "clingy". Steven even outright calls her a hypocrite in the next strip.
• I Kiss Your Hand: Dewey does this to Bella when bidding her farewell after their time at the pizza place. Cue a frozen Bella.
• Interspecies Romance: After Bella and Susan lose their jobs the Big Donut, after talking to each other for a while, Dewey and (unbeknownst to him) Yellow gradually start dating.
• I Resemble That Remark!: Yellow blows up spectacularly when one anon points out that she always makes such funny faces.
• Jaw Drop: Susan does this upon watching Pearl and Rose fuse in Greg's music video.
• Killed Mid-Sentence: After Aquamarine immobilizes Yellow with her weapon, she proceeds to gloat to a protesting Topaz that she wasn't actually going to try it when Yellow destabilizes her halfway through her talking.
• Laser-Guided Karma: One certain ask wonders if Aquamarine could use her weapon to stop Yellow in her tracks; Aquamarine proceeds to do so, and it seems to actually work! Cue epic poofing by Yellow.
• Line-of-Sight Name: Yellow names a newly discovered, first cut of a Gem "Stevensite" (the author's note clarifies this by saying that, yes, Stevensite is in fact an actual kind of mineral).
• Luminescent Blush:
  • Yellow blushes deeply and cuts Greg off from explaining the birds and the bees any further to her.
  • Yellow Pearl blushes when her disguised Diamond hugs her.
  • Blue Pearl and Yellow Pearl blush when Steven hugs them.
  • Steven blushes when Connie kisses him.
  • Yellow blushes quite a few times the more she interacts with Dewey.
  • Yellow Pearl blushes deeply when Steven compliments her on her scientific analysis skills.
• Mama Bear: Upon finding out that some members of an alien race shattered Steven's first Gem, Mouthy, Yellow orders her army to eliminate every last one.
• Not Quite Back to Normal: After Steven gets resurrected, he not only now possesses a taller height, but he also has Pink Diamond's hairdo and pink diamond-pupil eyes.
• "Not So Different" Remark: Yellow Pearl's overall concern for Steven when his human half can't breathe on a certain alien planet is compared by Steven himself to the CG Pearl's own behavior.
• Please, I Will Do Anything!: When White gets ready to mind control, Yellow tearfully begs her that she'll promise to fall back into line.
• Post-Kiss Catatonia: Yellow freezes up when Bill kisses her hand. It takes a couple of calls from Blue in order to get her to snap out of it.
  Author's commentary: Sorry Susan, but Yellow.exe has stopped working.
• Puppy-Dog Eyes: Steven pulls these in order to try and get Yellow to play video games with him.
• Rebus Bubble: Blue has one when she misinterprets "son" as "sun".
• Right in Front of Me: Happens numerous times when Yellow and Blue are disguised as Bella and Susan respectively.
  • At one point, Steven decides to bring them along to meet Lars and the Off-Colors. Cue him introducing the two to them by saying that "They're refugees from their home planet on the run from the tyrannical Diamond overlords!" Blue and Yellow are NOT amused.
  • When Lapis, Peridot, and Bismuth replace Bella's and Susan's jobs at the Big Donut, the first two end up getting into an argument over who did what to save them from Blue and Yellow, completely unaware that their ex-Diamonds are standing right in front of them.
• Secret-Keeper: Blue and Yellow Pearl promise to keep to themselves about their respective Diamonds' part-time Earth gigs. Greg also makes a promise to the Diamonds when he sees their true identities.
• Shout-Out: Word of God has a complete list of these regarding the scenes following up to and during Steven's death and resurrection, which includes those to Tangled, Frozen, My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic, and Doctor Who.
• Silent Treatment: Blue completely shuts out Yellow after they accidentally fuse.
• Slice of Life: A number of the comics focus on the days in the Diamonds' lives.
• The Talk: Poor Greg has to deliver one to Yellow, and then much later to Blue, offscreen regarding how Steven was able to be conceived.
• Tsundere: Yellow is in denial about her growing crush on Bill.
• Uncatty Resemblance: The Ruby that Steven creates by himself comes out having some of his hairstyle in her own.
• Vomit Discretion Shot: One scene has the disguised Blue eating a donut—without shapeshifting a digestive system whatsoever. Amethyst later whispering to her how to do so turns out to be far too squicky for her to handle.
• Wall of Text: Appears when Yellow Pearl infodumps on the planet she, her Diamond, and Steven are visiting.
• We Hardly Knew Ye: Mouthy is created in Steven's effort on making his very first Gem, and is later shattered by an alien attack.
• Wham Episode:
  • Steven being kidnapped and his gem being removed by Blue.
  • Blue and Yellow accidentally Fusing with each other.
• Wham Shot: An unconscious Steven's gem being inside a bubble.
• You Won't Like How I Taste: When Steven is about to be eaten by a group of alien natives, he yells that he's not even very tasty.

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