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Dramatic Hearts is a Machinima Web Animation of the Affectionate Parody variety, based (very loosely) on the story of Kingdom Hearts II. The series, which started shortly after the game's Japanese release in December of 2005, is essentially composed of edited cutscenes in the original Japanese with different subtitles that tell a story of their own. Most famous as a radical case of Refuge in Audacity / Vulgar Humor, just about any filthy, racy, Not-Suitable-For-Children subject matter you could think of is elaborated on, and frequently.

The new story is centered around a young boy named Luke—wielder of the mighty Dildo Blade—and his friends Ronaldo and Poofy, as they travel about saving the world from Negro Slaves, the Jackson family, and a dastardly and mysterious order of Jewish Bankers, among many other assorted villains and wackos.

The main series itself had three "seasons", with the occasional special episode here and there. A fourth (and "final") season was planned, and would have presumably been made entirely with The Bouncer cutscenes, but it was scrapped for unknown reasons after the first episode was posted online in Summer of 2006. Later on, after the RE: Chain of Memories was released, another series, called Dramatic Hearts XD, was produced. So far there has been no word on whether any plans exist to expand the series further with scenes from 358/2 Days or Birth By Sleep.

Those who want to watch the series should start here, if you dare.


This series contains examples of:

  • Aerith and Bob: Some characters' names are based on the KH character's name, but the rest come from a wide variety of places, which means we have Luke, Andrew, and Joanna in the same world as Mansex, Hardon, Malifacent (sic), and Dickey.
  • Animate Inanimate Object: Sort of. Apparently, Namine Betty is a book who murdered Austin's mother and is wearing her skin. Also, Malifacent is a living door. Yes, really.
  • Applied Phlebotinum: Brandon's "Originalization" beam.
  • Big Bad: Mansex, leader of the clan of Jewish Bankers.
  • Black Comedy Rape: Poor BHK!Luke, always getting raped and nobody seems to care all that much.
  • Breaking the Fourth Wall: "I can't see the subtitles!"
  • Christmas Special: The two-part special entitled "The Best Kwanzaa Ever", in which the racial humor is taken up to eleven.
  • Depraved Homosexual: Sephiroth, Mansex.
  • invokedDude, Not Funny!: Onit lets Austin know his random one-liner about Princess Diana's death is "horrible". Of course, the series then just laughs it off by having Austin start "warming this pimp hand".
  • Even Evil Has Standards: A variety based on sexual deviancy: In the special "Showdown of Sexiness", when Tifa Titties tells Sephiroth she's done a Cleveland Steamer, Sephiroth calls that (with a completely straight face thanks to game engine graphics) completely disgusting and says that not even he would do that shit.
  • Freudian Excuse: Mansex's reason for wanting to destroy all yuri? His "horrible" mother was a lesbian.
  • Fun with Subtitles: Of course.
  • Gag Sub: The modus operandi of the series.
  • Idiot Hero: Luke
  • Jerkass: Pretty much everyone.
  • Leaning on the Fourth Wall: "This town's really fucked up".
    • In fact, every time a character actually points out how fucked up everything in this series is, it probably counts.
  • Medium Awareness: Numerous times. Among them, Luke gets teary-eyed when "Dearly Beloved" starts playing at the end of Episode 2x02.
  • Mr. Exposition: Father Porn
  • Power Trio: As with their game counterparts: Luke, Ronaldo, and Poofy.
  • Public Service Announcement: One of the specials is a PSA that essentially exists as a big Take That! to every single perceived Dramatic Hearts rip-off on Youtube.
  • Punny Name: King Dickey, Handsome
  • Refuge in Audacity
  • Screwed by the Network: In-Universe
  • Seinfeldian Conversation: Handsome and DIZ talking about Lost in the first season.
  • Soundtrack Dissonance: Thanks to the series' practice of using the raw cutscenes from the game. Most notable in Episode 3x08 when Mansex's line "Next you'll say your dick feels like corn" is met with operatic fervor by "Darkness of the Unknown".
  • Space Whale Aesop: Not quite, but close—the description for Episode 08 presents the following moral quandaries: "Is it wrong to call a black man a crook if he stole from you? Is that racist? What if he was invisible and only you could see him?"
  • Spy Speak: King Mickey Dickey in Episode 2x02.
    "You must keep quiet. Remember the code word! Waffles."
  • Suspiciously Specific Denial:
    Luke: (waking up) What happened?
    Fuu: Nothing.
    Rai: We didn't put you in a dress.
  • Tempting Fate: "If there is a God let him kill me with a rock!" Made all the more hilarious if you played Kingdom Hearts II first and know what happens later in the scene...
  • Title Drop: Frequently from Episode 1x12 on, after it is revealed that Dramatic Hearts is the name of the Yuri channel DIZ and Handsome are determined to create.
  • Unsympathetic Comedy Protagonist

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