"After previous investigations in four different states, we've seen and heard some strange things, but even we were surprised at what we found here in Florida."
“Kim Jong-un doesn't understand that we aren't afraid of him. What that guy doesn't get is that we already have an unstable peninsula that will ultimately bring down America. It’s called Florida.”
Conan O'Brien, at the 2013 White House Correspondents' Dinner
"It was what amounted to a happy ending for the starring couple in a tragic and inimitably Floridian morality tale involving sex, liquor, self-defense law, erectile dysfunction and a man shot to death with his pants around his knees."
—The Tampa Bay Times, describing the case of a man killing his wife's lover.