Follow TV Tropes

Following

Quotes / I Take Offense to That Last One

Go To

    open/close all folders 

    Anime and Manga 
Nijika: You're in your thirties and you can't sleep without holding onto a stuffed toy!
Seika: I'm only 29!

Officer Jenny: So tell me what you know about this Team Rocket Trio.
Ash: Well, officer, all I know is they're three of the sneakiest, snakey-est, lyingest losers you'll ever meet.
Jessie: Who are you calling losers?!
James: But he's got the rest right.

    Comic Books 
Melissa Coolridge: Sheesh! Forget it. I wouldn't expect an old nerd like you to understand.
Peter Parker: Old?!
Melissa Coolridge: I see you didn't argue with the nerd part.
Peter Parker: Old?!

Inventor: The Grid's carbon-neutral, non-pollutive, and better yet... it's taken a bunch of useless brats off the streets. We can reduce our carbon footprint and curb overpopulation at the same time! So... what do you think?!
Ms. Marvel: What do I think? I think you're a wannabe evil genius who thinks he's saved the future when really he's just given up on it. I think you're a megalomaniac with some kind of weird Pied Piper complex. I think you're a bird!
Inventor: I AM NOT A BIRD!

Student 1: Did you see that new girl Linda Lee?
Student 2: I can't believe how dorky she looks!
Student 3: Her head is totally huge!
Student 4: Almost as big as her ego...
Student 5: Who does she think she is?
Student 6: She looks like some kind of monkey!
Student 7: Goofy.
Student 8: Outta her mind...
Student 9: Her nostrils must be at least a foot in diameter! Like caverns leading to a lost world...
Linda: Okay... For the record, just so everyone knows, I have petite nostrils! They're tiny and cute!

    Comic Strips 
John: I'm spending Friday night with a fat, worthless cat!
Garfield: That fat part was uncalled for.

    Film — Animation 
Mirabel: Some of us have bigger problems, you selfish, entitled princess!
Isabela: Selfish?!

    Film — Live-Action 
The Dude: Fuck the tournament. Fuck you, Walter.
Walter Sobchak: "Fuck the tournament?"

John Daggett: You dumb bitch.
Catwoman: Nobody ever accused me of being dumb!

Princess Leia: Why, you stuck-up... half-witted... scruffy-looking... nerf herder!
Han Solo: ...who's "scruffy-looking?"

Phil: You old crook.
Anne: Young crook, please!

Ken: Harry, let's face it. And I'm not being funny. I mean no disrespect, but you're a cunt. You're a cunt now, and you've always been a cunt, and the only thing that's gonna change is that you're gonna become an even bigger cunt. Maybe have some more cunt kids.
Harry: Leave my kids fucking out of it! What have they done?! You fucking retract that bit about my cunt fucking kids!!
Ken: I retract that bit about your cunt fucking kids.
Harry: Insulting my fucking kids?! That's going overboard, mate!
Ken: I retracted it, didn't I? Still leaves you being a cunt.
Harry: Yeah, I fucking got that.

Roger Murtaugh: See how easy that was? Boom, still alive. Now we question him. You know why we question him? Because I got him in the leg. I didn't shoot him full of holes or try to jump off a building with him.
Martin Riggs: Hey, that's no fair. The building guy lived.

Man: "Yo, get off the road, freak!"
Gargamel: "How dare you!? How dare you call me 'yo'?!"

    Live-Action TV 
Beggar: Oh, that's typical of t'Tory trash 'oo live 'round 'ere, innit? Won't even spend a bit of change for someone 'oo's 'ungry and 'omeless. And wha' about a bit of social responsibility? Tight-fisted slag!
Sharon: 'Oo are you callin' a Tory?!

Jesse: Some straight like you, giant stick up his ass, all a sudden at age — what, sixty? He's just gonna break bad?
Walt: I'm fifty.

Jeff: God's sakes! What did I tell you guys?!
Abed: (imitating Jeff) Oh, for god's sakes, everybody! Do whatever you want! Leave each other alone!
Troy: Whoa! That's a good Jeff! How did you do that?
Abed: 10% Dick Van Dyke, 20% Sam Malone, 40% Zach Braff in Scrubs, and 30% Hilary Swank in Boys Don't Cry.
Jeff: ...Zack Braff?
Abed: Sorry.

James May: I believe deep in my heart that I look good in [the Rolls Royce Drophead Coupé] and it suits me because it's stylish and contemporary.
Jeremy Clarkson: Every time I see you those are the words that pop into my head: "stylish" and "contemporary."
James May: Thank you.
Jeremy Clarkson: ...After other words like, for instance, "beige," "Stannah Stairlift," "The War." Can anyone think of any more?... "Homosexual."
[Beat]
James May: I object to the "beige."

Woman: "You bald, electrical newt!"
Uncle Fester: "Newt!?"

    Radio 
"Ghost the Racist Fruitbowl, had a very shiny hambone! Ghost the racist fruitbowl, he is a reptilian! On one foggy Hannukah night, Ghost was beating his son—"
"Wait a minute! Hanukkah night? HANUKKAH NIGHT!?!? YOU STUPID...!"
Ghost and an unfortunate caller

    Video Games 
Chelle: Ugh. I am certain you would be a MOST unruly equine companion.
Mym: Who are you calling an unruly equine?! I am an unruly DRAGON!
Cleo: That's not the part of that statement I thought she'd object to...

Leon: Finished?
Cid: Would be, if it weren't for the old loon's magic.
Merlin: OLD loon, you say!?

Timmy Turner: Hey you wiener! You don't look so scary from up here! You look like a toy monster!
Mawgu: NOBODY CALLS THE MAWGU A TOY!
Danny Phantom: But apparently, calling him a wiener is okay.

Phoenix Wright: ...this witness is a big, fat liar!
April May: F-fat?!
Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney, "Turnabout Sisters"

Interviewer: What about this "Gnasty Gnorc" character? Now, I understand he's found a magic spell to turn gems into warriors for his cause.
Lindar: I'll take that question. Gnasty Gnorc is a simple creature.
Gnasty Gnorc: Simple?!
Lindar: He has been contained in a remote world, and is no threat to the Dragon Kingdom.
Gnasty Gnorc: No threat?!
Lindar: Besides, he is ugly!
Gnasty Gnorc: Ugly?! THAT DOES IT!

    Web Animation 
Cinder: I'm Cinder Fall. This is my associate, Arthur Watts. And these are my disciples, Emerald and Mercury.
Raven: Two children you've tricked into following you, a disgraced Atlesian scientist, and a Fall Maiden with a surname so appropriate she probably picked it herself. Something tells me you've more than a slight case of egomania. Is that about right?
Watts: (Clears his throat) Technically, I was also a doctor, but the rest was spot on.
RWBY, "A Perfect Storm"

    Western Animation 
Hector: Godbrand, you never met anything you didn't immediately kill, fuck, or make into a boat.
[...]
Godbrand: ...I like boats. I'm a fuckin' Viking! We're s'posed to make boats outta things!

Sting: You're fat, greedy and selfish, Bumble! You only think about yourself!
Bumble: I am not fat!

Roach Coach: I am not just an insect! I am Roach Coach! I am the future ruler of this planet, you stupid biped!
Bubbles: Who you calling a biped?

Jack: (finding a near-dead villager) Poor unfortunate creature.
Villager: HEY! I'm not poor!

Ned Flanders: You ugly, hate-filled man!
Moe: Hey! Hey! I may be ugly and hate-filled, but I... um, what was the third thing you said?

Eeth Koth: Your reputation precedes you, general. The reputation of a coward, and a murderer.
General Grievous: Murderer? Is it murder to rid the galaxy of you Jedi filth?

Peppermint Larry: Everybody in Stormalong knows you don't have any money.
K'nuckles: Stop lying! Not everybody in Stormalong knows that!

Leela: "No offense, Fry, but you've become a fat sack of crap."
Fry: "Sack!?"
Futurama, "Why Must I Be a Crustacean in Love?"

Eugene Krabs: "Lame! You're nerds! Geeks! Creeps! And babies!"
SpongeBob SquarePants and Patrick Star: "Not babies!"
SpongeBob SquarePants, "Mid-Life Crustacean"

    Other 
"I read in her diary that she thought me 'a talentless gigolo'... in any case, I'm only disturbed if the phrase means that I had no talent as a gigolo. I believe that this is actionable in law even if proof is no longer demonstrable by me in life."
Gore Vidal on the diaries of Anaïs Nin, Palimpsest

"He called me a rapist and a recluse. I'm not a recluse."
Mike Tyson

Norman Osborn: (on the phone) Okay, so, once he starts thanking people, we need to steal his fish. His Goldfish. It's gonna, it's gonna be hilarious.
Kingpin: I'm gonna do something to you. I'mma fuck you up. I'mma kill your ass.
Norman Osborn: You can't kill me. Yeah right, you can't kill me, I'm everyone's favorite Spider-Man villain.
Kingpin: That red hair's gonna be covered in your blood after we scalp you.
Norman Osborn: It already is, I've been scalped twice already. You're way behind schedule, Kingpin.
Kingpin: Guess what? Your wig: snatched.
[Norman's smile fades]
Norman Osborn: It's... it's not a wig. It's not a- he knows it's a wig! He knows it's a wig!

Momo: Hey, I'm just trying to help the kid out! I don't see you doing anything besides dicking around and buying your Dragon Ball Z figurines off eBay, you FAT. BROWN. DIRTBAG COW!!
Appa: "BROWN!?" That's IT!!

Guy: That motherfucking cop has driven past here twice in the last fifteen minutes.
Cop (on car's loudspeaker): I'm not a motherfucker.

Top