Quotes / I Take Offense to That Last One

"Ghost the Racist Fruitbowl, had a very shiny hambone! Ghost the racist fruitbowl, he is a reptilian! On one foggy Hannukah night, Ghost was beating his son—"
"Wait a minute! Hanukkah night? HANUKKAH NIGHT!?!? YOU STUPID...!"
Ghost and an unfortunate caller

Princess Leia: Why, you stuck-up...half-witted...scruffy-looking...nerf herder!
Han Solo: ...who's "scruffy-looking?"

"I read in her diary that she thought me 'a talentless gigolo'... In any case, I'm only disturbed if the phrase means that I had no talent as a gigolo; I believe that this is actionable in law even if proof is no longer demonstrable by me in life."
Gore Vidal on the diaries of Anaïs Nin, Palimpsest

"He called me a rapist and a recluse. I'm not a recluse."
Mike Tyson

Leon: Finished?
Cid: Would be, if it weren't for the old loon's magic.
Merlin: OLD loon, you say!?

Ned Flanders: You ugly, hate-filled man!
Moe: Hey, hey, I may be ugly and hate-filled, but I... um, what was the third thing you said?
The Simpsons, "Hurricane Neddy"

Officer Jenny: So tell me what you know about this Team Rocket Trio.
Ash: Well officer, all I know is they're three of the sneakiest, snakeiest, lyingest losers you'll ever meet.
Jessie: Who are you calling losers?!
James: But he's got the rest right.

Faultline:What have you done that’s worth a seat at this table?
Skidmark: We hold territory-
Grue: You hold nothing. You’re cowards that hold onto the areas nobody else cares about, making drugs and selling them to children.
Skidmark: We sell to everyone, not just-
Grue: Find a booth.

Jack: (finding a near-dead villager) Poor unfortunate creature.
Villager: HEY! I'm not poor!

Red: You contemptible canine!
Carface: Hey, don't call me canine!