Japanese Animes and Commas
Even electronic brain pancake crystal elderly.
What a beautiful duwang. chew. There must be no other place as pretty as this town. This feels like a picnic.
That's the reason he attacked Chaos Control! He found out I collected all the Chaos Emeralds to keep them out of his grasp! You know how reckless Sonic is! I was afraid of what he might do if he got a hold of the emeralds, so I set up defenses, but there was no stopping Sonic! He was determined to push his selfish search for thrills all the way this time, no matter who got hurt! Finally, Sonic invaded Chaos Control, and to my horror, he finally achieved his goal! Sonic destroyed Chaos Control and sent us all here, just for the fun of it!
— Dr. Eggman calling the power of the explosion the name of his base, Sonic X
Vegeta, Yamcha, Tien Shin, and Clearinnote , they had survived!
—Dragon Ball Z History Of Trunks (AD Groupe dub), during a scene of them being killed.
You're too fool and optimistic.
— Godatz, Delicious Party♡Pretty Cure
Conpoota Seftwar/Herdwar
This Driver can't release to failure!!
—An error message that Gigabyte Technology software sometimes throws
Censooma herdwar
Be Unique Yourself, Enjoy Every Moment.
— The tagline of a Buyee portable DVD player/Nintendo Entertainment System emulator that was part of the second wave of SouljaGame consolesnote
Visual Tele Action in the Live
Paul Gretton: The story on the back makes no sense.
Robert Martinez: No.
Paul Gretton: "Anna's sister cold snow queen to her under a curse". And so it goes on; it doesn't make any sense at all.
Robert Martinez: No.
Paul Gretton: "Anna's sister cold snow queen to her under a curse". And so it goes on; it doesn't make any sense at all.
—Fake Britain, featuring counterfeit Frozen (2013) merchandise
Litter Archer
To inform oneself of a person.
How is that gentilman who you did speak by and by.
Is a German.
Tongh he is German, he speak so much well italyan, french, Spanish, and english, that among the Italyans, they believe him Italyan, he speak the frenche as the Frenches himselves. The Spanishesmen belie ve him Spanishing, and the Englishes, Englisman.
It is difficult to enjoy well so much several langages.
How is that gentilman who you did speak by and by.
Is a German.
Tongh he is German, he speak so much well italyan, french, Spanish, and english, that among the Italyans, they believe him Italyan, he speak the frenche as the Frenches himselves. The Spanishesmen belie ve him Spanishing, and the Englishes, Englisman.
It is difficult to enjoy well so much several langages.
— From "Familiar Dialogues" in English As She Is Spoke
by Pedro Carolino note
by Pedro Carolino note Many experiments have been conducted in which an English sentence (preferably an idiom) is translated by one computer into Russian, then a second computer translates the Russian back to English. The purpose of the experiment is to see how much distortion results. In one case they tried the idiom: "The spirit is strong, but the flesh is weak." What came back was: "The vodka is good, but the meat is rotten."
—Raymond Smullyan, What is the Name of This Book?
Teeter
Bernardo: How quiet guard?
Francisco: I am looking for the excitement of the mouse.
Francisco: I am looking for the excitement of the mouse.
— Hamlet I.i, courtesy of http://translationparty.com
Vidyo Gaems
"UH - OH! THE TRUCK HAVE STARTED TO MOVE!"
—Metal Gear (NES version)
"THIS is what I call frue destruction!"note
"Barret, be careful! Attack while it's tail's up! It's gonna counterattack with its laser."
— Cloud leading the player to eat a face full of laser, Final Fantasy VII
"This guy are sick."
— Aeris, Final Fantasy VII (PlayStation version)
"It really doesn't matter! But you really got guts doin' my boss (Tseng) in like that!"
— Elena, Final Fantasy VII (This mistranslation, corrected in the PC release, caused many to incorrectly believe that Tseng was dead.)
EGGIE!DRUG
BAG FUCK
BAG FUCK
— Vietnamese bootleg of Pokemon Crystal (For the record, it's "Eggie put the Potion in the Item Pocket". Yeah.)
CONGLATURATION!!!
YOU HAVE COMPLETED A GREATnote GAME.
AND PROOVED THE JUSTICE OF OUR CULTURE.
NOW GO AND REST OUR HEROES!
YOU HAVE COMPLETED A GREATnote GAME.
AND PROOVED THE JUSTICE OF OUR CULTURE.
NOW GO AND REST OUR HEROES!
—Ghostbusters (1984) for NES
There's a noble American girl named Rose
She tried to get away
From her "arranged married",
Oh oh naaaye!
At the same time she met Jack
Tap A quickly to not die as fast!
He "lighted on her life"
He lighted on a couple of her other things, too!
They were also "fall in love with each other"
Hoo hoo hoo!
She tried to get away
From her "arranged married",
Oh oh naaaye!
At the same time she met Jack
Tap A quickly to not die as fast!
He "lighted on her life"
He lighted on a couple of her other things, too!
They were also "fall in love with each other"
Hoo hoo hoo!
"Sound of Ten persons Pulling out Mode."
— Wangan Midnight Maximum Tune 4, likely meant to be translated as "10 Outrun Mode Soundtrack".
"SUDDEEN KILL"
— Wangan Midnight Maximum Tune 3, if a 10 Outrun Mode stage is completed with an S rank.
Because nutrition sucked by the huge monsters, sor all the plants have shriving one. This atmosphere of peace has been destoyed.
The green land is becoming to wasteland. And peoples lives were also threaten by monsters.
Till one day, a little hero called Jony has come up. He must defeat all these monsters by his magic flower.
The green land is becoming to wasteland. And peoples lives were also threaten by monsters.
Till one day, a little hero called Jony has come up. He must defeat all these monsters by his magic flower.
—The intro to Magic Jony
''The story is wordy and confusing and translated from Russian by a mystical rat that only speaks in riddles."
— H.Bomberguy describing the infamous original English translation of Pathologic
A Unique Webzone
Pourquoi débourser pour un pro quand Google Translate est gratuit? Ce n'est pas comme anyone'll connaître la différence.note
[roll end credits]
These guys are cool, I mean, the puzzles were brutal and the maps were good. The magic effects kicked ass. YOU SUCK ASS TRANSLATORS! WHAT A SHITTY JOB YOU DID! AND TEXT CONSULTANT? YOU DIDN'T DO SHIT.
These guys are cool, I mean, the puzzles were brutal and the maps were good. The magic effects kicked ass. YOU SUCK ASS TRANSLATORS! WHAT A SHITTY JOB YOU DID! AND TEXT CONSULTANT? YOU DIDN'T DO SHIT.
Look, I'm not going to lie to you guys: Samurai is not a good series. Its big problem is in its writing. The acting is not great overall, but frankly, even really talented actors would struggle with dialogue like this. And the reason that the writing is so terrible is that in a lot of places, it's a note-for-note translation of the Sentai. There are several episodes where it's pretty clear they just ran the script through a translator and adjusted a few words. But otherwise, it sounds like something that was originally in Japanese and made much more sense in Japanese.
Of course, in the sucking ass tradition, the person doing the transcribing is either dyslexic or doesn't speak English. "Party on Wayne! Oh... OH! I no feel so great now Mista Wayne! I think I am going to schwing! kill all american devils"
—Seanbaby reviews Wayne's World: The Game
"The famous master making guitars are: Nicola Amati (nicolas, Marty)..." WHAT-!? (bursts out laughing, but is able to mostly regain his composure) If you're going to Anglicise names, you have to be able to speak English! That's really important!
"Note: If the talk nonsense, touch the key put a bar drum cycle do background talk nonsense, if is talk nonsense long time no touch, about 26s automatic turn off, into energy saving mode, the process of ring to set off drum background". Only one person talking nonsense here, and it ain't us, old boy. Um, yeah. So, what, it can detect if you talk nonsense and shuts itself o-? I'm very confused by that.
The fun with this product starts with the packaging. At first glance, it looks rather normal, but look a little bit closer and you'll see that the certificate of authenticity tells you that the product is "dripping genuine dissapearancenote ". And rather confusingly, it tells you to "Meet the golden section of the mini-size". And finally, as everyone knows, "The instructor must have the best weapon".
I don't think I'd trust any of these marks along the bottom here, because look at this. "Use ing in room." Um, yeah... I won't be using that in my room.
— Techmoan, regarding a cheap Chinese USB wall plug, The Glitchy Clock - Taking one for the team
The whole idea was born after witnessing yet another translation debate on touhouwiki.net. After a while, you realize that Touhou translations never seem to be final. No matter how long a particular translation of some aspect has endured, years later, someone with perhaps a bit more knowledge of Japanese culture can come in, debate it, and eventually have it changed. During these debates, people are sometimes shocked about how little sense the original translation made or how it distorted the original meaning, and thus, the general perception of the content. That's why touhouwiki.net's policy openly encourages this process. In the end, the wiki page everyone looks at is edited and the correction is made. And all of this would be fine if we were merely translating pieces of literature. But we're talking about games here. The English patches stay frozen at a certain state and are never updated - because their original developers continue to believe in their own translation, they considered the job done as soon as they've released the patch, or even have long abandoned this fandom in case of the older games.
— Touhou Patch Center explaining one of the reasons why the THCRAP project exists, referencing the older, static system of patches.
explaining one of the reasons why the THCRAP project exists, referencing the older, static system of patches.In The West Animation
"I know those words, but that sign makes no sense."
— Lisa Simpson, "Bart vs. Australia"
"This is what you get for using a free online translator."
Life Realtor
"They were being manufactured and the manual was all done, there were some spectacular boo-boo's in the manual. One of the descriptions for a magic effect was 'blows wizard.' As opposed to be "blows blizzard," which it should've been, or something like that."
—Ted Woolsey on localizing Final Fantasy IV
Pardon my French, but this was a goddamn mess. The SF title, "Murder Hollace," was laughable. I'm going to try to break down what happened here. First, there was a transpositional error in the game itself: the designer tried to write "murder holes" phonetically, but transcribed "holes" slightly incorrectly. This was misread by the SF translator as "Hollace," and from there... I honestly don't know what happened. I've left in their translation note below, but for whatever reason they concluded that "murder hollace" was to "trap yourselves and the enemy in a single room and fight them to the death". Problem is, "hollace" isn't a word. The OED, the definitive record of the English language, has no record of it. Common online dictionaries have no record of it. It is, quite simply, not a word - and I have no idea what logic led the translator to conclude that it referred to some kind of Sun Tzu-esque "desperate ground" notion.
— Cirosan, on Fire Emblem: Thracia 776 Chapter 11x, which he has renamed "Balistrariae".
Fire Emblem: Thracia 776 Chapter 11x, which he has renamed "Balistrariae".