As this is a Funny Moments page, spoilers will be left unmarked. You Have Been Warned!
During the tutorial mission, the party muses on where Verge is — Whisper informs them that he hailed a cab and is on his way. But what really pushes it into funny territory is when you get the puppeteer ability for him at his final rank, as one of the things he may say simply is "Let me drive", implying that he "Hailed the cab" by mind controlling its driver and driving himself to the crime scene.
Sacred Coil employs androids and mechs, these mechs can prime their self destructs. How do they do this? By rearing a fist back and punching themselves.
What makes this funnier is just how frequently the androids blow themselves up to the point where commonly it's the first thing one will do. You'd think Sacred Coil would be hamstringing their operation with how often they need to replace them.
On the topic of android, after you pull off a raid to stop Sacred Coil from using the "recall" anti-theft function of androids, you get a transcript of a funny call:
Caller: I think there's something wrong with my neighbor's android.
31PD: Your neighbor should call the android's manufacturer, sir.
Caller: I don't think he'll be able to do that right now.
31PD: Why not?
Caller: He's, huh, handcuffed to the android. Thoroughly handcuffed. It's just walking down the streets saying "recall" over and over.
One of the random radio chatter dialogues that can come on between missions is an advertisement for a live grub-based cereal called BIG CRUNCH (The cereal that writhes!) that can be eaten by Humans and Hybrids. But not Sectoids because it's apparently toxic to them. Cue disappointed Sectoid in the commercial.
Another commercial from the same In-Universe company for NotDogs has a Sectoid at a company picnic state that Chicken Eggs and later Hot Dogs are both also toxic to Sectoids, though the stilted delivery of his lines implies that this might actually be an In-Universe stereotype about Sectoids.
The NotDog commercial goes on to read a series of warnings in a rapid fire manner: That no alien should eat more than one pack a week without consulting a licensed gene therapist, that NotDogs should never be exposed to sunlight, and that NotDogs should be discarded if they "turn the human perceptible color blue".
A possible conversation between Cherub and Verge reveals that Sectoids are just as allergic to human foods as the ad suggests, and Verge is willing to get around this by splitting costs with Cherub just to taste the food vicariously through a Psychic Link. The way he describes, of all things, a Philly Cheesesteak makes it sound like he's done nothing but dream about it for years on end.
There are a lot of amusing little posters and pictures scattered in the city's backdrop:
The interior of the viper nightclub can be visited in one of Chimera Squad's missions. They've got a stage with a dance pole set up, with a messy pile of notes at the base of the pole, suggesting that a viper pole-dancer had been at work before the night was disrupted by armed criminals.
There's a poster of mutons wearing human clothing, complete with a female muton in a dress.
Torque notes to Verge that she's surprised XCOM would recruit aliens like him. When Verge points out she's an alien, she denies it — she was hatched on Earth, making her an Earthling. The poison sacs, fangs and scales just means that some Earthling hatch luckier than others.
A commercial is about "Burger Palace" is a chain of burgers opening across the city, following a rebranding and some trouble with the "Truth and Reconciliation Commission". The implication that they are ADVENT Burgers, forced to rebrand after the war.
The commercials for Burger Palace get more and more weird:
The first reveals their burgers are made of Kelp protein, which means that they've been forced to switch it from using excess human meat during X-COM 2, and they've somehow settled on kelp.
Then a later commercial mentions that something called a "Flavor Bulb" is implanted in the patty. And that it's left to "mature". Okay. Weird.
Then a third commercial mentions that they now offer a Com-patty-bility guarantee, in that each of their "flavor bulbs" are keyed to be edible by a specific species — if you can't eat it, the flavor bulb ensures the patty simply flees from you.
The text on the billboard advertisements visible during some missions is written in English, but in a weird font and horizontally mirrored. One ad encouraging pet adoption feels the need to remind its viewers, "Do not eat cats please. Do not eat them."
A sequel poster involves a Sectoid marketing edible fish, with the caption "Tastes better than cat!" as a subtitle. People really don't want anyone to get desperate enough to try eating the cats.
There is a billboard that has a picture displaying a Faceless coming to the rescue of a cat. Yes, Faceless. The concept of a fifteen foot red-eyed sludge monster taking a page out of Superman's book is hilarious.
If you make Torque use Tongue Lash on Terminal, the later exclaims "Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! AGAIN!" in glee.
Whisper trying to warn the team to be careful around the city archive. A team member will offer a random bad suggestion.
Whisper: City Archive has a lot of irreplaceable artifacts, so you know...
Torque:(Excitedly) Shoot the duplicates to drive up the value of the remaining goods!
Claymore: Light it up?
Terminal: Test the limits of the post-war insurance industry?
Axiom: Smash softly?
Whisper: ...Let's go with "Not that".
Expanding on the above, when Whisper tells the squad to be careful with their shots during another mission in sensitive territory, Claymore deadpans that all he heard was "throw explosives everywhere". Also serves as a Running Gag of poking fun at Vahlen's request for the soldiers to be more careful with explosives in Enemy Unknown and Enemy Within.
Another mission involving caches of explosive fuel has Claymore helpfully suggest that they can feel free to blow everything up as long as they maintain a minimum safe distance.
Claymore really gets some fun out of being a Demolitions Expert who is not a Mad Bomber. As when a VIP is confirmed and Claymore chimes in that "He'll be careful where he throws his explosives". Whisper is starting to berate him for it when Claymore cracks a smile and reveals that was the joke. Another VIP hiding in a dam has Whisper remark that a live capture is preferred, to which Claymore responds:
Claymore: 'Claymore, don't blow up the dam'. Whisper: Good advice in general. Why'd you bring it up? Claymore: Efficiency, I said it so no one else had to.
This exchange:
Cherub: Blueblood! I need your help for some training!
Blueblood: Sure, what are we doing?
Cherub: I want to test an adjustment to my shield. I need you to shoot me.
Blueblood: What? No! I'm not shooting you.
Cherub: It's the only way to test my shield in field conditions!
Blueblood: No it's not! We got ballistic mannequins for this very purpose. Let me set one up.
Cherub: Oh, right. Thanks. I don't know what I'd do without you.
Blueblood: Probably get shot in the face.
Terminal suggest she and Patchwork should have a Gremlin fight. Patchwork is offended by the idea because she has better things to do than be forced to repair Terminal's Gremlin when it's been turned into a pile of burning slag. Prompting this reaction from Terminal.
Terminal: Did you just talk smack to me? Oh Patches, I'm so proud of you.
Other dialogue from Patchwork indicates that she has long stopped naming her Gremlins, as she has gotten more than forty replacements. She cites lightning strikes and freak accidents for most of her Gremlin losses.
During the Very Definitely Final Dungeon, Whisper spots what is apparently an empty room on the building blueprints. There's no windows or doors there, so he has the squad crash the APC into the side of the building to make their own entrance, only to discover that the 'empty room' has, in actuality, since been repurposed as Shrike's live fire target range.
Blueblood: I'm going to go with "get some better maps."
Your agents can also deliver some sick burns in response to the final boss' Motive Rant.
Sovereign: A handful of casualties today, or a whole world tomorrow. It's an easy choice. Zephyr: That is the craziest crap anyone's said in this room. And this used to be ADVENT's headquarters.
Cherub naively asks when they'll get to the field office, only for Whisper to admit the repurposed railyard warehouse IS their office (at least until the actual office is constructed). Whisper tries to tell Cherub he'll get used to it, before admitting he won't, due to it being a total dump. Cherub cheerfully states that it's THEIR dump, so they'll make it work, causing Whisper to want to bottle up his enthusiasm.
The conversation with Blueblood is similar, with Whisper saying that until they get the actual office constructed, they're stuck sleeping in a railcar repair yard. Cue Blueblood saying "See? Every job comes with a few perks," to which Whisper mutters "Let me know when we have any."
Axiom tells Whisper there's a problem - namely that he took the biggest locker. Whisper says he knew Axiom was coming, and that he only reserved the locker so the other members wouldn't take it for themselves. When Whisper promises to remove his stuff from the locker, Axiom admits he already did so. Violently. Whisper than asks if Axiom saw the note that presumably explained everything to him, and Axiom says he only saw it AFTER he trashed Whisper's gear, before sheepishly promising to replace what he could.
Patchwork is upset due to her taking the time to spec out a workshop for the new field office, only to find it's just a warehouse while the actual building is still under construction. When Whisper apologizes for that, Patchwork than says she needs to find a place to tinker. Whisper allows her to pick out any open floor space, and Patchwork immediately brightens up due to so much of it available.
Whisper: Zephyr! You made it! Zephyr:Yeah. Whisper: You grab a locker? Zephyr:Yep. Whisper: Have everything you need? Zephyr:Yeah. Whisper: Good talk. Zephyr: (Death Glare) No.
When Whisper asks Verge what he has to say about their temporary new home's exposed steel girders, Verge says this:
Shelter is irritated that the city stashed them in the warehouse, and when Whisper tells him it's not so bad, Shelter says he doesn't need his psionics to tell Whisper is lying (to which Whisper says he isn't lying, just "morale-building"). Shelter then asks if there's anything good to eat, and Whisper says he saved a bowl of chili for him in the fridge, to which Shelter proclaims THAT is morale-building.
In the ending cutscene, the squad reminisces about their old temporary HQ. Torque licks her chops at the mention of the place's rat infestation.
The first credits sequence shows the staff members of the key groups of Firaxis employees that worked on the project, along with stylized depictions of various humans and aliens performing some... related tasks. The QA department? A muton with a baseball bat fighting off several tiny chryssalids. That is, debugging.
This exchange:
Whisper: Gray Phoenix is here to erase that server. Cherub:Permanently! Whisper: ...Well, yeah. Cherub:With guns! Whisper: ...Are you going for some sort of Dramatic Announcer thing? Cherub:Yes!
Whisper explains that Sacred Coil is running a protection racket on an apartment block for hybrids. Chimera Squad needs to take them down so the poor residents can reclaim their homes and peace.
Claymore: Yes, yes... Keep structural damage to a minimum. You can all stop looking at me.
For added hilarity it's entirely possible that this is immediately followed by one of the Breach points being exploding a wall with Claymore.
During another mission in an apartment complex...
Torque: I really wanna push someone over the edge. Whisper: For the last time, no. Torque: (sulkily) I said I wanted to, not that I was gonna do it...
Blueblood plays fashion critic:
''What kind of [ADVENT] contraband? Plasma grenades, or those stupidhelmets?"
In one notable bit of base chatter, Torque calls up Director Kelly to have a heart-to-heart about her difficulties bonding with her squadmates. Torque's confused when Kelly tells her she reminds her of herself ("You had fangs?"), but eventually gets the point and is reassured. Then...
Torque: You going to start wearing sweaters? Kelly: Bite your tongue.
Digging into the files of the game reveals that Patchwork is banned from entering ADVENT Tech Vaults. Why?
, in witch costumes