Funny / Recess: School's Out

  • "Bon voyage, TEEEEEEEEE JAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
    • T.J. and every kid, staring on like "WTF?", when Mikey does that.
    • Not to mention that he shatters the window next to him; the kindergartners then remark, "...big kid sing good."
  • T.J. mimicking Principal Prickly's voice with a voice modulator:
    "And I want you all to know that I have a fat, saggy butt, which I like to scratch every hour, on the hour."
    • And just before that, after Prickly (seemingly) instructed the kids to eat the ice cream and ignore Ms. Finster, she says in a hushed tone "This can't be happening."
  • Benedict's Motive Rant:
    Benedict: I've always thought about you! How you embarrassed me! How you humiliated me! How you destroyed my relationship with Muriel Finster! The only woman I ever loved!
    T.J.: That part still grosses me out, sir.
    Prickly: Shhhh!
  • Vince:(right after tractor beam is fired, but shorts out) "Okay that right there... that was messed up."
    • Promptly followed by Mikey fainting with an audible thump.
  • Vince getting in line to board the bus to baseball camp, only to see the Ashleys in line, too.
    Vince: Don't tell me you Ashleys are going to baseball camp!
    Ashley T.: Eww, as if!
    Ashley A.: Cheerleading camp is like, across the lake, duh!
    Vince: I hope it's a big lake.
  • The scene where T.J. is upset about not having his friends around during the vacation, when the audience is introduced to Becky, who comes into the room right before going to work.
    Becky: Bye Mom, bye Dad...bye T-jerk.
    Mrs. Detweiler: Now Becky, be nice to your brother. He's feeling a little S-A-D right now.
    T.J.: I can spell, Mom.
  • The gang finding out that the villains weren't using a laser on the moon, but a tractor beam.
    Mikey: You mean they're going to plow the moon's surface? Whatever shall they plant?
    Spinelli: Not a tractor, you goomba; a tractor beam!
  • The kids at the wrestling camp's version of "Kumbaya":
    Someone's wrestling, my lord, kumbaya/Heads are smashing, my lord, kumbaya/Bones are cracking, my lord, kumbaya...
  • The scene where they are hiding in the vent. TJ's line: "Sssh, the bad guys are talking!" Then Mikey lets out a burp so loud that not only does it shock everyone that hears it, it blows their cover too. What Benedict says sounds both funny and badass.
    • And when Benedict puts his head up at that, the expression on his face just reads "What the hell was that?"
  • When T.J. witnesses some scientists testing a miniature tractor beam, and immediately runs home to tell his parents.
    T.J. (running): Mom! Mom!
    (runs smack into the sliding glass door to his house)
    Mrs. Detweiler: T.J.! Are you alright?!
    T.J.: Mom! There are these evil bad guys at the school, and they've got a laser beam, and—!
    Mrs. Detweiler: Oh, T.J.! That bonk on the head must have rattled your little brain!
    T.J.: But Mom!
    Mrs. Detweiler: (feels T.J.'s forehead) You're feverish! Wait right here! I'll go get the baby thermometer and the petroleum jelly!
    T.J.: Uh... Dad! Dad! (runs off to the garage, where Mr. Detweiler is working on his car)
    Mr. Detweiler: What is it, boy?
    T.J.: Those evil bad guys at the school have a laser beam, and they're lifting a safe, and—!
    Mr. Detweiler: T.J., did you run into the sliding glass door again?
    T.J.: No, but... (beat) Well, yeah, but... (beat) GAH! (runs off again)
    Mr. Detweiler: Come back! Your mom's gonna want to take your temperature!
  • Spinelli headbutting Ugly Bald Guy in the crotch (both an awesome and funny moment)
  • Benedict punishing Rosenthal after the laser suddenly shuts down. Considering how the former is voiced by James Woods and the latter by Tony Jay, it gives off the darkly humorous mental image of Hades sentencing Frollo to eternal damnation.
    Benedict: Dr. Rosenthal? Why did the beam suddenly, oh what's the technical word for it, um...stop?!
    Rosenthal: (nervously) Well... as I believe you were told before—
    Benedict: "Told before?" [chuckles, then walks menacingly towards Rosenthal] Do you think I care what I was told before?
    Rosenthal: P-P-Please, sir! I-I-I'll do better next time.
    Benedict: "Next time?" Isn't that cute? Rosenthal, lemme ask ya something. Say you were a teacher—or even better say... the principal of a school, and you had to deal with a delinquent student, a naughty child, who didn't know his place, who kept telling you over and over that he'd do better next time... but he never did. What would you do?
    Rosenthal: Oh, no! N-Not detention! NOT DETENTION!
    Benedict: Take him away!
    Rosenthal: No, please! I can fix it! DON'T DO THIS TO ME-E-E-E-E! [is dragged out the room by Bald Guy and a guard]
  • Ms. Finster tries to climb the rope TJ & the gang climbed...only for the rope to snap and she falls right on top of Randall.
    Randall: (muffled) Ms. Finster? Could you please get off of me?
    • Then as she tries to go through a basement window:
    Ms. Finster: (squelch/"stuck" noise) I'm stuck! (move legs futilely inside basement) Curse these bodacious hips of mine! Randall, run back to my place and get the butter!
    • As Randall's running home to get the butter, Ms. Finster sees the green laser from Benedict's tractor beam.
    Ms. Finster: What are those kids up to in there?
    Ms. Finster: What the J.P. Morgan is goin' on around here?
  • When T.J. is gathering the kids from their camps and it comes to be Gus' turn, they find his superior officer yelling for Gus to not move a muscle. And indeed, not even Gus' expression changes when the rest of the gang picks him up and carries him off as if he's a statue.