Funny / Pocahontas
The Disney film
- From the first few minutes, after John rescues a crewmember - namely Thomas - on the maiden voyage to America:
Crewmen #1: Well done, laddie! Well done!
John: [swinging down from the mast inbetween the two crewmen] But of course. You'd have done the same thing for me.
Crewmen #1, 2, and 3: [beat, then awkwardly] Oh, sure! Of course! Absolutely!
- This little exchange:
- "And he came so highly recommended."
- An alternate scene has Wiggins saying, "Ooh! I do so love a fracas!" He mimics shooting a gun with a soup ladle, until he trips and an axe barely misses him, before Ratcliffe says the above line.
- Even funnier- in this alternate take, the axe was mere inches away from Wiggins' balls. For a split second he looks absolutely terrified and can only chuckle nervously.
- John Smith's first meeting with Grandmother Willow.
Pocahontas, that tree is talking to me. Pocahontas: Then you should talk back.
Say something. John:
What do you say to a tree?
- Most of Wiggins and Ratcliffe's dialogues, but this one in particular:
- Nakoma's reaction to Pocahontas jumping off a cliff. And when Pocahontas hits the water she grumpily says "show off".
Pocahontas, your father's back! Come down here! [as Pocahontas dives off the top of the cliff]
No ... not that ... way. [Then, when she can't find Pocahontas in the water] Nakoma:
Pocahontas? Are you all right? Well, you'd better be all right, because I'm not coming in after—(Pocahontas surfaces from the water and overturns the canoe)
YOU-HOO-HOO! [cut to both of them under the canoe; Nakoma surfaces] Nakoma: Don't you think we're a -splut- little old for these games? [Pocahontas spits water in her face. They laugh and splash each other.]
- Meeko when he jumps down the cliff after Pocahontas. He goes from confident to REALLY scared in a second when he realizes too little too late that he can't swim and it's hilarious.
- Meeko's expressions while Pocahontas is singing "Just Around the Riverbend", especially when she goes down the waterfall.
- Meeko and Flit's reaction to Pocahontas suddenly managing to learn English.
- Grandmother Willow's scene with John Smith.
Grandmother Willow: [on John Smith] He has a good soul. And he's handsome, too.
John: I like her.
- This dialogue.
- And this dialogue between Ratcliffe, Ben, and Lon.
You there, where's Captain Smith? Lon:
Well, he's...gone. Ben:
Aye, your singing must've scared him off. Ratcliffe:
Well, then go get him, for heaven's sake! Lon:
What if we run into the Indians? Ratcliffe:
That's what guns
are for! Now, arm yourselves and get moving!
- This bit:
- Ben and Lon when Grandmother Willow hides John and Pocahontas from view.
(Grandmother Willow lifts her root and trips Ben and Lon) Ben:
Watch your feet, ya big oaf! Lon:
It wasn't me! It was the tree! Ben: Oh, of course! The tree just felt like liftin' its roots andľ (They turn to see the root lower itself into the ground. They are clearly freaked out)
...Let's get outta here! (Grandmother Willow slaps Ben and Lon in the butts with her vines) Both
: OW! Ben
: RUN! Lon
: But what about Smith? Ben
: He's a big lad! He can take care of himself!
- When John Smith is trying to show Pocahontas what a handshake is. He has his hand held out and the expression on her face as she says "Nothing's happening".
- John accidentally offending Pocahontas and trying to stop her from rowing her canoe away - so she climbs the tree to get away from him.
- His Digging Yourself Deeper, trying to say 'savage' is just a word for people who are uncivilised. The fact that Pocahontas delivers her line "like me?" while hanging upside down from a tree branch makes it even better.
- When John approaches the bush where Pocahontas is hidden, Flit angrily flows out and attacks him. As John dodges him the rest of his biscuits fall from his sack and Meeko eats them all.
John: Hey! Wh— What? Watch out. What? Get— No. get— Uh, look out...
- John's attempt to break the fight bewtween Percy and Meeko.
John: It's all right, Percy, he [Meeko] is a friend. [Percy won't calm down.] BAD BAD DOG ! SIT !
- When Meeko steals the compass.
John [shrugs] It's all right, he can't hurt it. [Meeko bangs it against a rock] HEY!
- Flit's constant attempts to peck at John, which annoy him. On the final attempt to peck him, John was prepared and traps Flit's beak in a biscuit (as pictured above), which he then tosses. The indignant hummingbird then makes the mistake of looking upwards while the biscuit was still stabbed into his beak, causing it to slide down and crush him under the weight.