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Funny: Everybody Hates Chris
  • This piece of dialogue from Everybody Hates Fat Mike when Rochelle gives Julius a grand chewing out for saying that he does house work better than her which can be found here.
    Rochelle: Well, ain't this about a bi-! (crash) Are you crazy?! You do my job for one day (crash) and now it ain't that damn hard?! (crash) You bakin', fryin', (crash) biscuit bakin', pancake makin', bald-headed bastard! (crash) You must think I'm crazy! (crash) You can kiss my ain't that hard a-! (crash) HAVE YOU LOST YOUR MIND?!
    • And then what Chris says afterwards:
    "And that was my mother's way of letting him off easy."
  • Chris is pretending to be a bad boy to impress a girl. He's confronting a waiter who threatened to throw him out while "Everybody Plays the Fool" plays and his parents walk up behind him.
    Rochelle: Chris!
    Chris: What?!
    • To the sound of his heartbeats, we see a black screen, then Rochelle's angry face, then a black screen, then Chris' Oh Crap face, then a black screen, then Chris lying on a bed in the hospital. A nearby X-ray reveals that Rochelle's shoe got stuck in his anus.
  • "Hey mom, can I have some cookie?" No, that's not a typo.
  • When Chris gets a dog, he takes him to a trainer in a Puerto Rican part of town to which he claims is just like Bedstuy just with more Puerto Ricans. "There was a Puerto Rican Killmoves." Cut to Killmoves wrapped in a Puerto Rican flag trying to dance to latin music.
    • The episode ends with Chris being chased by the dog, with the the usual episode-ending Recurring Riff being sung in Spanish.
  • Everybody Hates the Subsitute:
    Subsitute: Veni. Vidi. Vici....I came. I saw. I conquered.
    Chris: Eenie. Meenie. Miney. Mo....Catch a tiger. By the toe.
  • From the above:
    Subsiture: "The Vitruvian Man."
    Chris: "The Hang Man. Pick a letter."
  • Julius having a phobia of rabbits? Funny. Finding out that he has this phobia because he saw Night of the Lepus? Hilarious.
  • Rochelle gets mad at Julius for not telling her about a credit card he has, to which he tells her that the only thing he bought using it was her wedding ring, which gets her to be quiet. While he's calm about it, we then see an Imagine Spot of him doing a hilarious victory dance while singing about how he was right.
  • Why did Chris decide against admitting to his father that he drove his car without permission? He imagined that his dad would throw him out the window if he found out.
  • In "Everybody Hates Malvo", Caruso gives Chris a "comedy" video for his Betamax system. The film? The Birth of a Nation
    Narrator: Whatever it was, it couldn't be as bad as Soul Plane.
  • When Rochelle threatens to smack Chris "into another nationality", she does so and Chris is now Chinese.
    • Similarly, in the Thanksgiving episode, Chris' grandmother threatens to "hit him into another family". Smash Cut to Chris on a couch with a white family.
    Woman: How did you get here?
    Chris: You don't want to know.
  • In "Everybody Hates Ex-Cons", when Julius feels betrayed when he finds out that Drew is a fan of the Mets and not the Dodgers (which he only likes because they had Jackie Robinson for a player).
    Julius: What are you listening to?
    Drew: The Mets, they're my new favorite baseball team.
    (cut to a shot of the earth exploding)
  • In "Everybody Hates Earth Day", Tonya gets busted at school for threatening a classmate, which Rochelle finds out is a trait that she got from her. And to add to it, Tonya repeats the threat to her family in Rochelle's voice.
Even StevensFunny/Live-Action TVEverybody Loves Raymond

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