Fan Fic: Saruman Of Many Devices
aka: Saruman Of The Many Devices
Saruman of Many Devices
I optimize the world-line of civilization, Saruman. Not the world-line of any particular being.
can be read here, by author Saphroneth
Summary by the author: Alone of every power in Middle-Earth, Saruman innovates, notably gunpowder. But he lost. What if he had a little help? Actually a cross-over between The Lord of the Rings
and The General
series by David Drake. Uses both book and movie elements.
A chipped Palantir stone has Saruman the White dial in to a master much different from Sauron. Central - an AI made to bootstrap fragments of human civilization up to the level at which it once was, one step at a time. Well, not only human.
Armed with advanced scientific knowledge and the ability to see projected futures, he sets on the uneasy task of imposing peace and progress upon the rather stagnant and traditionalist nations of Middle Earth. With an army of Uruk-hai, of course.
Tropes contained in Saruman of Many Devices
- Alternate Universe: Seems to be a fusion of the Peter Jackson movie (Lurtz is present), and the original books (female orcs are present; Uruk-Hai are bred from orcs and humans instead of orcs and goblins, Eowyn takes the pseudonym Dernhelm when riding with the Rohirrim), and the Games Workshop Tabletop Wargame (a squad of rifle uruks is persued by the Ringwraith Khamul the Easterling, Black Numenorian magicians are part of a probing attack on a fortified town, the Nazguls called The Shadowlord and The Undying are slain during the Battle of the Pelenor Fields), on top of its being a crossover with The General.
- Arms Dealer: Saruman sends arms and ammunition to the Elves when it's revealed that the Mordor orcs are starting to make their own guns.
- Artificial Intelligence: Central is one. Fortunately, his sole motivation is to improve the lot of technologically backwards civilizations.
- BFG: The Anduin field guns and Branduin mortars that the Army of the White Hand uses.
- Badass Army: The Army of the White Hand is well trained, has excellent leadership, and is by far the most technologically advanced army in the world right now. Lurtz's company alone is able to deal with forces many times its size. And they're only going to get better.
- Boom, Headshot: Uruk-hai snipers are very good at this.
- Legolas too, but he can do it with a bow and arrow.
- Boring but Practical: Central's way most of the time - there's little use to Wunderwaffen if you can't equip your army with them effectively.
- Very much justified, in this case. The Free People of Middle-Earth face a vastly-numerically superior foe that has a mix of magical wonder weapons (or wonder fortifications, in the case of The Black Gate and Barad-dur) and semi-rare superweapons (Olog-Hai/Battle Trolls, mumakil, the Nazgul and their Fell Beasts, skilled Black Numenorian mages, etc). The Alliance needs to hold off Sauron's forces/allies on every front, not just the one where Saruman could deploy his potential wonder weapon.
- Cool Guns: Since gunpowder and weapons based off it are entirely new technologies within Middle Earth, this pretty much applies to every gun.
- Common Military Units: The Army of the White Hand is divided into regiments which are further broken down into companies, platoons and squads.
- Common Ranks: The Army of the White Hand seems to follow the same rank system as a modern day army.
- Cultured Warrior: Lurtz is fluent in several languages and apparently is well read too.
- Curb-Stomp Battle: The Battle of Minas Tirith goes a mite differently.
- Also the result of Sauron clearly not taking the threat of firearms seriously, not having bothered to inform his commanders of the possibility or change his battle plan much.
- An expeditionary force Saruman sends to help Dale hold off Rhun's invasion also wins a number of victories like this. However, the Rhun forces actually adapt (to an extent) rather quickly, ensuring that any second battle with a Rhun army is, at most, a Curb Stomp Cushion.
- Seriously averted in the Battle of Cair Andros. With a modest Gondorian garrison and only a hundred or so Isengard troops (plus its warg mounts and werewolf scouts), it struggles to hold out against an onslaught of Easterlings, Black Numenorians (including a few mages), and orcs, with the siege being broken in the nick-of-time by a surprise charge by the remaining muster of Rohirrim. Against a force with good morale, discipline, and an adaptive commander, even a fortress and 19th century firearms won't help you for very long.
- Depleted Phlebotinum Shells: Mithril-tipped bullets, made from melting down a dwarven ring of power in Saruman's possession (making the mithril also enchanted). Given how ridiculously few of these he has, he saves them for one task and one task only: a last resort for killing Nazgul. He ends up making use of them in chapter 10.
- Fantastic Racism: The uruk-hai meet with suspicion or outright discrimination from most, at least until they prove themselves. Rather interestingly, the uruk-hai take it in stride—which helps them overcome this considerably.
- A Father to His Men: Pretty much every commander in the Army of the White Hand. Lurtz especially finds it hard to watch his men die and be unable to do anything about it.
- Five Rounds Rapid: Said word for word by Lurtz in Chapter 4.
- For Want of a Nail: All this comes from Saruman's Palantir being damaged.
- Frontline General: Saruman becomes this in the later chapters.
- Future Loser: Central shows a projection of the original LOTR timeline to Saruman (where he is very much the loser), in order to persuade him to go along with the plan. He also convinces Saruman to give up any notion of acquiring the One Ring for himself with a concise, excellently logical argument: the One Ring is an agent of entropy, ultimately leading all who wield it and seek it for their own gain to ruin—even Sauron himself. Saruman pretty much takes the point in stride, being unable to find any holes in the argument.
- Giving Radio to the Romans: If the Romans were taller, greener and meaner. And radio was a gun, plus the assortment of industrial technology required for their manufacture and deployment.
- Grand Theft Prototype: Inverted. Instead of the good guys acquiring a prototype from the bad guys, it's the other way around. Even though their own gun versions are vastly inferior to those produced by Isengard, it's still worrying that they could even do that in such a short amount of time.
- Great Offscreen War: Averted. Unlike in the books, the battle for Dale is shown quite clearly.
- Guns Are Worthless: Completely and utterly averted. The rifles and field artillery used by Saruman's forces give them a massive advantage against everyone else and as such are prized beyond most anything else. The orcs of Mordor even begin making their own, albeit far cruder and more primitive versions.
- Heel-Face Turn: Saruman, who, instead of trying to claim the Ring for his own, is now aiding the West and the Fellowship of the Ring. Also Lurtz, who, in this alternate universe, is now the commander of an elite company of reconnaissance dragoons and lends invaluable help to Frodo and Co. from Rivendell on south.
- Henchmen Race: While the uruk-hai are bred and trained primarily for battle, they are first and foremost Saruman's valued officers and soldiers. However, he also hires craftsmen and refugees from other races.
- Saruman's argument to Gandalf in the first chapter clearly indicates that he takes pride in the uruk-hai as a people, rather than as his henchmen (like in canon). He trains them to think creatively, take initiative, and be multifaceted. Lurtz, for example, is a linguist by hobby; Raza is a logistical expert, medic, and inventor.
- Horse of a Different Color: Saruman's cavalry is composed not of horses, but wargs. The reason for the replacement is that wargs are both smarter and have better endurance than horses. Oh, and they can also rip apart enemy combatants with their jaws.
- Immune to Bullets: Averted. Even trolls get brought down by them.
- Played straight with the balrog in Moria. It barely seems to notice them and Lurtz and his men have to get resourceful.
- Improbable Aiming Skills: Legolas of course. As just one specific example, in chapter eight, he makes with his bow and arrow a 1300m shot - one Lurtz gapes at as impossible even for rifles.
- Irony: Boromir becomes friends with Lurtz, the Uruk-Hai that killed him in the films.
- Leave Behind a Pistol: In chapter 12 Earl Dorwinion is offered the medieval equivalent for his treachery - a dagger is given to him and he is told to shave before his sentence is served. He has a "shaving accident".
- Magic from Technology: At one point, hidden orcs snipe at an enemy force holding a town. Due to the extended range and poor visibility, all they perceive from the Uruk-hai units (asides from their commander) are gunshots, which leads them to believe the Uruk-hai have potent magic on their side.
- When Central shows him visions from an alternate reality where science reigns supreme, even Saruman can barely comprehend the technology he sees.
- The Magic Versus Technology War: Falls on both sides of the fence - magic is not completely invalidated, but a rifle volley beats a fireball nine times out of ten. It helps that most Tolkienian magic is subtle, on the level of enchanting weapons or amplifying voices.
- Saruman utilizes his own magic in very subtle ways to have a significant effect on a large scale; breeding special crows that are intelligent and can (in effect) facilitate telepathic communication between himself and whomever the crow is physically touching, for example, or making a detailed, 3D map projection of a fortress to help his commanders come up with a battle plan. Sauron, on the other hand, tends to use more overt magic for a more immediate, obvious effect—darkening the sky, cloaking a strike force from sight for a short time, creating wonder weapons like Grond, etc.
- Medieval Stasis: Central warns Saruman that this is the fate of Middle-Earth if it keeps going down its current path and so assists him in breaking the stagnation.
- Mythology Gag:
- In chapter 6 the author notes that the Fellowship still ended up getting broken by Lurtz at Amon Hen, albeit this time under friendlier circumstances.
- In chapter 11 Denethor tells Faramir that "I will not burn my city and my people on a pyre of my own self-aggrandizement."
- Overnight Conquest: Happens on both sides. The Easterlings are able to capture one of the most fortified cities in Dale by running a colossal bluff. The city gets recaptured during the night by the allied forces of Isengard and the Dale, with the help of some people on the inside.
- Reveille: Happens a lot within the Army of the White Hand.
- Revolvers Are Just Better: Given that Central can only advance Saruman's forces so far, this is pretty much justified for close quarters.
- Simple Yet Awesome: Central stresses that simplicity is something to strive for, particularly in regards to weapon technology. Making things more complex just leaves room for more problems to arise. That being said, in a time of swords and spears, even simple gunpowder weapons like rifles and cannons are nothing short of astounding.
- Stock Weapon Names: The guns made by Isengard are all named after rivers. The rifles are called Isens, revolvers Limlights, rapidguns Lunes, mortars Branduin and field guns Anduin.
- Unobtanium: Mithril. Its hardness and other properties come in handy for Saruman. Its magical properties (or magical potential) make them effective (though phenomenally expensive/rare) weapons against Nazgul, too.
- War Elephants: The Haradrim's Mumakil, which are elephants on steroids. It takes several shots from a battery of field guns to bring them down. Fortunately, they are pretty easy to hit.
- The War to End All Wars: The War of the Ring is shaping up to be this, especially with Saruman bringing his gunpowder weapons into it.
- The Women Are Safe with Us: Uruk commanders warn their troops against "messing with the women", due to Sacred Hospitality. Easterlings, on the other hand...
- X Meets Y: The Lord of the Rings meets Sharpe.