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The example itself, in case anyone here can lend a hand directly, but also to keep the OP from being more of a wall of text than can be helped:
- Usagi Yojimbo: Usagi and his Old Master are at a swordfighting competition. Usagi is told that the important is not to win... and when asked what will happen if he doesn't, correctly replies that his master will beat him to a pulp.
There is a fuller version of the quote on the Usagi Yojimbo page currently on the Broken Aesop example
Working on cleaning up List Of Shows That Need Summary
Thanks. I think I can create a clearer version of the entry now.
- Usagi Yojimbo: Usagi and his Old Master are at a swordfighting competition. Usagi is reminded that he is there to test his skills, not necessarily to win and that winning is unimportant. Usagi is then promptly also reminded that if he doesn't win his master will be beat him to a pulp.
"Reminded" isn't really the right word though, because Usagi is the one to say it rather than his master.
The way the quote went was the master saying "you remember why we're here?", which I took as a reminder. The second use of it was more for flow than anything.
Yes, but the wording is now saying that his master is telling him all this, rather than Usagi answering the question (it wouldn't be as funny otherwise).
Good point. How's this (if tweaking like this isn't too against ATT rules, it's at the top of the page atm anyway):
- Usagi Yojimbo: Usagi and his Old Master are at a swordfighting competition. At his master's prompting, Usagi repeats his instructions that he is there to test his skills, not necessarily to win and that winning is unimportant. Also at his master's prompting, Usagi says that he knows that if he doesn't win, his master will be beat him to a pulp.
I'd also suggest that "repeats his instructions" be made a Pot Hole to As You Know, since this is dialogue that both characters already know and it's getting repeated for the audience.
Link to TRS threads in project mode here.
This doesn't seem expository enough to warrant that.
A few weeks ago I Wiki Walked into the page Losing Is Worse Than Death. I did a bit of curating there and, in the process, came across an entry for Usagi Yojimbo. However, the grammar was such I was legitimately unsure what the entry was even trying to describe. Hoping to get some clarification, I popped the entry into the Usagi Yojimbo discussion page
, since the last edit before I found Losing Is Worse Than Death was back in February.
However, that was weeks ago and there's been no response. If there's an actual example there I'd like to preserve it, but I don't know the comic enough to re-write it. This doesn't really seem like a job for the Is This an Example? forum thread, since I'm not even sure what the example even is.
What I'd like is maybe a point in the right direction for where to get help with this. Should I go to the Is This an Example thread after all? Is there a thread I'm not thinking or aware of?
Edited by sgamer82