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Adulthood has turned me into a cynical, miserable hag

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BlueNinja0 The Mod with the Migraine from Taking a left at Albuquerque Relationship Status: Showing feelings of an almost human nature
The Mod with the Migraine
Apr 20th 2015 at 1:47:54 AM

[up] Probably true; I only made the joke because you were talking in military terms.

Thatís the epitome of privilege right there, not considering armed nazis a threat to your life. - Silasw
vanishingreality from Sinnoh
Apr 27th 2015 at 2:12:13 PM

I have always been cynical and miserable hag, yeah, because I have depression.

I'm learning slowly every day. I don't have to be controlled or give people I don't like any power. I'm learning what extent my negativity is physiological and slowly managing it. Before, I did not do this.

The most valuable lesson that it is okay to accept myself if I don't meet societal standards, and how many standards are truly arbitrary and wrong. I'm learning to be unapologetic about my opinions and existence.

I still am filled with bitterness and it feels like I never will be happy in my life time. I worry about my mental health all the time. Thats how it is but I won't go down without fighting.

PadurKaril Bile Connoisseur from San Josť, CA Relationship Status: Cigarettes and Valentines
Jun 26th 2015 at 10:28:34 PM

So many world weary 20 somethings in here.

I'd hate to see y'all when you're 40. It's a hard life here in the western world.

I'd rather the world betray me, but I won't betray the world.
Jun 27th 2015 at 1:19:30 AM

Well, it is a thread about people talking about how adulthood turned them into et cetera. I would hardly think it's indicative of the average adulthood. :P

edited 27th Jun '15 1:19:39 AM by Cozzer

TuefelHundenIV Watchman of the Apocalypse from Wandering Relationship Status: [TOP SECRET]
Watchman of the Apocalypse
Jun 27th 2015 at 1:16:11 PM

Also some of us are a bit older then you might think. I am a bit jaded and beat up from my time in military service. I joined the military just over 15 years ago.

"Who watches the watchmen?"
BlueNinja0 The Mod with the Migraine from Taking a left at Albuquerque Relationship Status: Showing feelings of an almost human nature
The Mod with the Migraine
Jun 27th 2015 at 8:34:51 PM

I joined the military 16.5 years ago ... wait, does that mean I'm actually older than Teuf?? Or did you join older than 18?

Thatís the epitome of privilege right there, not considering armed nazis a threat to your life. - Silasw
TuefelHundenIV Watchman of the Apocalypse from Wandering Relationship Status: [TOP SECRET]
Watchman of the Apocalypse
Jun 28th 2015 at 11:06:37 AM

No you are likely older then me by a bit. I joined at 18. I will be 34 this year.

"Who watches the watchmen?"
BlueNinja0 The Mod with the Migraine from Taking a left at Albuquerque Relationship Status: Showing feelings of an almost human nature
The Mod with the Migraine
Jun 29th 2015 at 9:53:02 AM

Holy cow, I'm more than a year older than Teuf! And all this time I thought you were in your 40s!

Thatís the epitome of privilege right there, not considering armed nazis a threat to your life. - Silasw
TuefelHundenIV Watchman of the Apocalypse from Wandering Relationship Status: [TOP SECRET]
Watchman of the Apocalypse
Jun 29th 2015 at 5:17:26 PM

Lol. Usually IRL they think I am younger. Still baby faced apparently.

"Who watches the watchmen?"
Pyrite Until further notice from Right. Beneath. You. Relationship Status: Hiding
Until further notice
Jun 30th 2015 at 9:14:26 AM

Face of a baby, head of a... jar?tongue

edited 30th Jun '15 9:14:35 AM by Pyrite

Not a substitute for a formal medical consultation.
InverurieJones '80s TV Action Hero from North of the Wall. Relationship Status: And they all lived happily ever after <3
'80s TV Action Hero
Jul 2nd 2015 at 2:14:26 PM

I believe the appropriate response to that would be 'oorah'...?

'All he needs is for somebody to throw handgrenades at him for the rest of his life...'
TairaMai rollin' on dubs from El Paso Tx Relationship Status: What is this thing you call love?
rollin' on dubs
Jul 2nd 2015 at 10:12:05 PM

Ah you kids in your "Twenties"...

All you need it a few more years and you'll see how silly the "youths" are wink

Actually, it's just a change of perspective. The things that seemed so important are less so and other things take their place.

abloogy woogy woo
InverurieJones '80s TV Action Hero from North of the Wall. Relationship Status: And they all lived happily ever after <3
'80s TV Action Hero
Jul 3rd 2015 at 6:54:48 AM

Yeah, just wait 'til you've been on fire a couple of times...

'All he needs is for somebody to throw handgrenades at him for the rest of his life...'
TairaMai rollin' on dubs from El Paso Tx Relationship Status: What is this thing you call love?
rollin' on dubs
Jul 4th 2015 at 5:46:43 AM

[up]Or have a kid, all my friends who have children are much different now that they have spawned.

Or join the rat race for real. Once you're in the job market, a lot of the sh_t you worried about in your early twenties don't mean much when you have the bills to pay.

abloogy woogy woo
Pyrite Until further notice from Right. Beneath. You. Relationship Status: Hiding
Until further notice
Jul 4th 2015 at 5:48:07 AM

Can we get a two-for-one and just set the kids on fire instead?

edited 4th Jul '15 5:48:22 AM by Pyrite

Not a substitute for a formal medical consultation.
InverurieJones '80s TV Action Hero from North of the Wall. Relationship Status: And they all lived happily ever after <3
'80s TV Action Hero
Jul 5th 2015 at 5:38:57 AM

I believe that is generally contraindicated.

'All he needs is for somebody to throw handgrenades at him for the rest of his life...'
GAP Formerly G.G. from Who Knows? Relationship Status: Hugging my pillow
Formerly G.G.
Jul 11th 2015 at 3:58:37 AM

This basically sums my attitude having children. The truth I am sure if I will ever be ready since I had been ingrained since birth to have a strong foundation to support others via have a house, money and degree. Also, I still feel like I need to wait awhile before I consider it as it feels like huge step. Is your life really over when you have kids? It is true in metaphorical sense as it is no longer your life anymore but still the media portrays it as I bad thing. I am still single myself but it seems like life is passing me by.......

"The original slime is always the best one."
InverurieJones '80s TV Action Hero from North of the Wall. Relationship Status: And they all lived happily ever after <3
'80s TV Action Hero
Jul 11th 2015 at 5:06:03 AM

The media is run by a certain kind of person and they have little time for any other kind.

No, your life isn't over after you have kids. You just find yourself very busy. I can't imagine not having them around now, to be honest.

Who would want to miss out on the opportunity to be woken up in the morning by a little voice softly repeating 'Daddy...Daddy...' then being handed a beer opener and being told that it is 'for Daddy's juice'...?

Kids are a bit like the process that creates them, really; tiring as hell, but great fun.

'All he needs is for somebody to throw handgrenades at him for the rest of his life...'
GAP Formerly G.G. from Who Knows? Relationship Status: Hugging my pillow
Formerly G.G.
Jul 11th 2015 at 7:50:34 AM

[up] I see.

I wonder why it is portrayred as that? I gues might be one of those individuals who adopted this notion.

edited 11th Jul '15 7:51:51 AM by GAP

"The original slime is always the best one."
InverurieJones '80s TV Action Hero from North of the Wall. Relationship Status: And they all lived happily ever after <3
'80s TV Action Hero
Jul 11th 2015 at 4:05:56 PM

Possibly because the majority of people in media are narcissists who are appalled by the idea of not being the single most important person in their own life any more? That's probably why they can never make marriages last.

'All he needs is for somebody to throw handgrenades at him for the rest of his life...'
TairaMai rollin' on dubs from El Paso Tx Relationship Status: What is this thing you call love?
rollin' on dubs
Jul 11th 2015 at 6:15:41 PM

And because there is a market for youth and not "I like paying bills and the kids come first".

It's fun to be the rebel and not pay bills or have responsibily. It's not fun to be the one who has to put up with a broken X-box because little Jonny needs school supplies and he busted his lip and you had to take him to the ER.

And the world (real and fictional) is filled with parents who should never have had kids. Some think Babies Make Everything Better, some are accidents, some are people who think they have it all sussed only to have their family life fall apart.

And people there are people who are man or woman enough to admit that they either: A) don't want kids, B) aren't ready for kids or C) not sure either way but don't want to take any foolish chances.

It's a sign of maturity to postpone (or decide not to) having kids. Just as much as it's a sign of maturity to take care of the kids you have.

abloogy woogy woo
KingFeraligatr King of Feraligatrs, Typo Master, from why would I tell you where I live?
King of Feraligatrs, Typo Master,
Aug 28th 2015 at 9:13:55 PM

I'm probably quite young in comparison to some others here(I'm beyond my teenage years. I won't say my exact age though.), but dam I feel old. Even when I was 19, I felt like an old man. I've even said "you dam kids" before, and I'm not too old. A lot of my childhood energy died a long time ago and now I'm a motivationless, pessimistic, lazy, old fart. I've realized things during my teenage years that some people can't realize ever. People are stupid, selfish, lazy, and jackasses. And I doubt anything will get better. The U.S.'s economy continues to decline and the corporations and politicians grow more powerful, evil, corrupt, rich, etc. every day. I doubt I will get my simple dream of getting a small place to myself that I can pay off in a couple years, get maybe a pet, get a stablish job, get a good gaming desktop, and play lots of video games and mod in my spare time (at least I can remain single grin. Thank fucking gosh). I'll probably stay in my current state of working part time (fine by me) and going to college part time for a while. Then I work for the corrupt people at the top for many years until things go to shit and I die, which means it's really over. I don't know if it's adulthood that's made me cynical (doubt it). It's probably the fact that I've grown up. But yeah; I'm a mentally retarded, useless, pessimistic, lazy, etc. fuck that feels older than he really is. My two cents I guess.

Hail to the King of Feraligatrs! Shameless advertising
GAP Formerly G.G. from Who Knows? Relationship Status: Hugging my pillow
Formerly G.G.
Aug 28th 2015 at 11:48:07 PM

[up] I feel almost the same way. Lately, I feel like an old man even though I am young and it is not a good feeling to have. I feel like I am not making any sort of difference, that Is hould be out there contributing somehow and I cannot find myself doing it. I feel somewhat cynical towards lots of things and I feel like I lost my drive. I wish I could turn back time but I can't. sad

"The original slime is always the best one."
Aug 31st 2015 at 11:55:51 PM

I've come to appreciate the difference between cynicism and healthy enlightenment. Likewise, I strongly feel that as we age, we are too harsh on our younger selves and others who have yet to share our experiences. It's the reason why the "kids are stupid" platitude has never jived well for me. There's a difference between being a bad person on a moral and intellectual level and being an inexperienced person.

Most of the 19-22-year-olds I see on campus aren't necessarily entitled, spoiled or dim-witted. They just haven't had the exposure to rectify their behaviors, and it's a bit snobbish to pretend like you didn't do a lot of the same silly things they did with your own set of rationalizations.

That said, cynicism does not confer age or life experience necessarily. I've met 24-year-olds who have experienced everything from homelessness to life-threatening disease. I've also found many people offline and online who are well into their fifties, yet they precisely act like the stereotypical youth they decry, if not far worse.

I think a lot of negativity from those 35 and up is coming from a frankly immature reaction to the fact that social media has made our world more immediately communicative than ever before. This subsequently means that you're going to be exposed to worldviews, philosophies, strategies and cultural values you've probably never seen up close. When you're old enough to have grandchildren and your perspective has been calcified, you probably won't respond well when you see a perspective that openly interrogates many of the things you've been led to believe for several decades.

edited 1st Sep '15 12:01:13 AM by Aprilla

Sep 1st 2015 at 12:04:15 AM

[up]Oh God yes, the "cynicism means enlightenment" and "youths these days" stock phrases. Everytime I hear one of them my whole body cringes.

I mean, you are free to be a pessimist or to dislike young people. I have seriously no problems with that. But please don't act like your choices are the only logic conclusion instead of, you know, choices.

Oh, also, the "being more intelligent and educated means you'll be a pessimist" bullplatitude. God, how I hate that.

edited 1st Sep '15 12:06:06 AM by Cozzer


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