1000 things we've learned from video games

92. With the proper application of science, even lemons turn into incendiary devices.

edited 22nd Apr '12 8:25:15 PM by RoyalArchetype

92a. ANYTHING can be used as a lethal weapon. Full stop. Even a fruit.

92ai: Aladdins Corollary: You can make a guards pants fall down by throwing fruit at them. (Very old game reference.)

edited 25th Apr '12 2:12:18 AM by GameChainsaw

• 93. It is entirely possible to make a sword out of diamonds with your bare hands.
• 94. Italians can jump ten feet in the air.
  • 94b. And ride dinosaurs.
  • 94c. And fly if wearing a cape.
  • 94d. And shoot fire out of their hands by eating a flower.

edited 17th Jul '12 1:15:02 PM by kagescorpionakki

95: Running up walls is enitrely possible if you're already jogging towards it.

• 96. Frag grenades- despite being filled with shrapnel- do not give off any shrapnel and if you are out of its reach (about... 10 feet) you will not be harmed in the least.

• 97. Med kits instantly restore any injury sustained when walked over.

• 98. If you get a limb shot off you either die instantly (even if an arm or leg) or die in a few seconds. You don't bleed out in a few minutes or simply pass out.

• 99. Sniper rifles, semi automatic rifles, and single shot guns in general do much more damage than their automatic counterparts, even if they fire the same kind of round.

edited 17th Jul '12 1:48:01 PM by Prometheus136

100. Medgel fixes all wounds, except in the third installment.

101. Being struck by lighting makes you small.

102. If you are married, expect him/her to die really soon.

103. Farmers all live in cities, commuting to work in the countryside every day.

edited 17th Jul '12 3:56:13 PM by RJSavoy

104. Mahatma Gandhi was brutal tyrant who used nuclear weapons.

105: If you don't like how history turns out, you can reset the Universe and try again. (ANY strategy game ever, especially the historical ones.)

106: One person really can kill armies, especially if that one person knows magic words that do awesome and powerful things. Like Control H! (Heal code for Mount and Blade. )

107. Nobody needs to die forever, unless it's a major plot twist.

edited 17th Jul '12 7:03:12 PM by ZeikHunter

107a. This does not mean that one CANNOT die for good, so stay sharp.

108. < See this? It's symbolism. See also: thing 666, thing 777, and thing 256.

edited 17th Jul '12 7:11:04 PM by ZeikHunter

109: Good writing is hard to come by.

110: When in doubt, churn out generic military first person shooter.

111: If you write a well-done game, or even just a wonderful character, people will roleplay the Heck out of that character in any game they can.

112: If you write said character, people might role play him/her in real life, too.

113. Give your character an elaborate costume whenever you can. It won't discourage the cosplayers at all.

114. If he has a sword, he's the main character. No exceptions.

115: If you have to fight a bosmore than once, it's the Dragon. No exceptions. It doesn't matter its rank. It doesn't matter if there's anyone ranked between it and the final boss, it won't mean a thing. (Learned in Spartan: Total Warrior}

116: Investigate anything that glows. Or not.

117. You can run sideways on walls.

118. The Earth will someday have plant/animal hybrids, but long after humans go extinct.

edited 18th Jul '12 4:09:06 PM by Landorkus

119: If it is Japanese it will have mechs.

120: If it is Japanese it will have overtly fetishized Caucasian women.

121: If it is Japanese then the plot will be convoluted and filled with "twists".

122: If it is Japanese it will almost certainly be weird.

123: If it is a Japanese horror game than it will sure as SHIT be scary.

124. Guards can tell which of your items are stolen, even if they didn't see you steal them.

125. Eight-year-olds are allowed to control mechs without anyone questioning them.

126: 'Realistic' military shooters are so realistic that the player character can carry around twenty magazines of assault rifle ammo along with ten magazines of a secondary weapon with no movement penalty and reloading magically puts the discarded bullets into a magical pool of ammo even if the animation shows the character dumping the magazine.

127: Ammo is magically attached to individual weapons or weapon types so that instead of the ammo being in pouches or on a tactical vest they are immediately treated as discarded along with the weapon they belong to.

128: You can pick up extra ammo by walking over it.

EDIT: Just realized the numbers were wrong.

edited 18th Jul '12 4:34:53 PM by Prometheus136

Woop, a power of two milestone.

129. Furnaces are just cubes of rocks with flammable objects inside.
130. It takes a few seconds to mine out a cube meter of rock with a good pickaxe.
131. Sex is just kissing after eating wheat in most cases.
132. There are infinite amounts of oxygen underground.
133. Plants grow instantly upon contact with calcium.

edited 18th Jul '12 5:52:39 PM by Reecer6

134: When you die in the Underworld, you are laughing in despair with THIS: DAH-DAH-DADAH!!! (duuuuum, DUH!)

135: No matter what Pokemon you verus, you try to do your best!

136: People can lose what looks like 3 liters of blood with every few rounds as well as leaking a lot more when downed and still be able to fight like nothing happened if someone just comes up to you and lift you up.

137: The idea of mixing Disney and Final Fantasy together is more than a bit bizarre, but somehow it works.