A Beautiful Thread for the Beautiful Game

Germany is my second favourite national team, and I wished they could've won silver. (A Finn would say that's losing gold, but 2nd place is still the 2nd most awesome thing you can achieve, so to hell with us!)

I saw them play England, and I must say that the game would've been more balanced without England having to take the psychological impact of having one of their goals missed by the referee and the assistants. Still, I enjoyed the game and the energy and joy that Germany brought into the field. I missed the game against Argentina, but I think I saw all of the group games and obviously I was nailed to the couch in front of the TV when Germany faced off against Spain with revenge on their minds.

If Germany beats Spain in the final of EURO2012, I'll be sorry for Spain but I'll also probably feel that the right team won, because there's no way Germany would win without earning it. (Another team that Spain recently faced in the final game of an international tournament will cheat to win, but Germany won't.)

Germany's demolition of Argentina was one of the highlights of the tournament for me. My reaction to the England game was, as a Brit, a mixture of that peculiarly British brand of stoic, stiff upper-lip disappointment, and the sheer joy of watching a fantastic counter-attacking team do what they do best - crush teams who are desperately trying to get back into a game they've already lost. The disallowed goal was a mental blow, yes, but in the end we never deserved to get anything out of that game, or out of that World Cup in general.

Oh, and yes, the Dutch were dirty cheating bastards, which is a shame given my admiration for their youth system, as I mentioned yesterday. Lest we forget◊.

Yeah. Even Johan Cruyff, the most legendary Dutch player in history and one of the guys who invented Total Football and by extension Spain's style of play, said of the Dutch team that "this ugly, vulgar, hard, hardly eye-catching, hardly football style – yes, it served the Dutch to unsettle Spain. If they got satisfaction from this then fine, but they ended up losing. The Netherlands were playing anti-football."

I also remember reading somewhere that he said that the Netherlands should've gotten two red cards in the first half.

Wikipedia has some quotes from the guy:

• "Zonder de bal kun je niet winnen. (Without the ball you can't win)"
• "Voetbal is simpel, maar het moeilijkste wat er is, is simpel voetballen. (Football is simple, but the hardest thing there is, is to play simple football.)"
• "Italianen kennen niet van je winnen, maar je ken wel van ze verliezen. (Italians can’t defeat you but you can lose to them.)" (I think this one is exceptionally true.)
• "Als je een speler ziet sprinten, is hij te laat vertrokken. (When you see a player sprinting, he left too late.)"
• "Voordat ik een fout maak, maak ik die fout niet. (Before I make a mistake, I don’t make that mistake.)"

This reminds me of one of our own national heroes, Matti Nykänen. He's a ski jumper and not a footballer, though. Also, Cruyff actually makes sense, even with blatantly obvious quotes like "If we have the ball, they can't score", while Nykänen... Well, I'll try to find a couple of quotes...

Couldn't find any in English, so I'll have to translate some.

• (After being asked what he'll do if he's not invited to the Finnish Winter Olympic team because of his unacceptable behaviour - fighting and drinking and all that: "Mä muutan Kööpenhaminaa ja haen Ruotsin kansalaisuuden. (I'll move to Copenhagen and apply for Swedish citizenship.)"
• "Elämä on Laiffii (Life is Life)" ("Laiffi" is not a genuine Finnish word, but rather a bastardisation of the English word "life".)
• "Ehkä otin, ehkä en, so not, kunhan hyppy kulkee. (Maybe I had some [alcohol], maybe I didn't, so not, as long as the jump goes far.)" (Note that he really likes to misuse English words without really knowing what they mean.)
• "Elämä on ihmisen parasta aikaa. (Life is the best time a human has.)"
• "Se on ihan fifty-sixty miten käy." (I'm having a hard time translating this... "The chances of this going well are fifty-sixty")
• "Elämä on kuin lankakerä - se alkaa ja loppuu. (Life is like a ball of yarn - it has a beginning and an end.)"
• "Huominen on aina tulevaisuutta. (Tomorrow is always in the future.)"
• "Lahti on ihan mesta paikka. (Lahti is a place location.)" (It doesn't make any sense in Finnish, either.)
• (When a reporter asks what he's thinking about before a competition): "No pilluhan se on aina mielessä mutta hypätään nyt ensin! (Pussy is always in my mind but let's jump first!)"

There's plenty more, even dumber ones that these, but translating these is breaking my mind. What I put here is just the tip of the iceberg.

edited 6th Apr '11 4:06:08 PM by BestOf

Wow, those are... dumb. I do like the Cruyff one about playing against Italy though. So very true!

One of my all time favourite footballing quotes of all time is Roy Keane's rant at Mick McCarthy at the 2002 World Cup: "You were a crap player, you are a crap manager, the only reason I have any dealings with you is that somehow you are manager of my country and you're not even Irish, you English c**t. You can stick the World Cup up your b*****ks." Quality stuff.

And of course, the legendary Bill Shankly: "Some people believe football is a matter of life and death, and I am very disappointed with that attitude. I can assure you it is much, much more important than that."

edited 6th Apr '11 4:40:23 PM by Saeglopur

Well, it looks like American sports franchise tycoon Stan Kroenke has roughly doubled his shares in Arsenal FC stock, which would give him a controlling stake in the club as the majority shareholder.

Indeed. Probably better than Alisher Usmanov, who was the other likely candidate, but seeing as he had sided with the now villified David Dein, while Kroenke sided with the chairman Peter Hill-Wood and the rest of the shareholders, Stan was always going to come out on top with this one.

From what I hear, he's a fairly quiet fellow who is unlikely to make any major changes either on or off the pitch, and seen as he's been on the board for 4 years, he knows how the club works and is pretty good friends with both Wenger and Ivan Gazidis, the executive director.

However, my worry is this - if Kroenke manages to get Usmanov to sell his 27% stake in the club, this will take Kroenke over the 75% required to make major changes to the financial structure of the club - i.e. he can saddle us with all of his personal debt, a la the Glazer family with Man U. So, any American sports fans have any idea of Kroenke's style, based on his tenure as owner of the Denver Nuggets, St. Louis Rams, Colorado Rapids etc?

Oh, how I wish that all shareholders of sport clubs would let the manager manage the team, so the team ownership would only be involved in the team's finances...

But that would presumably leave the manager with too much power, which would be a problem. Maybe it could be solved by asking the fans what should be done in cases where the manager clearly hasn't a clue?

^^ He isn't very well known for getting too involved with his other sport franchise investments. That's about all you could say.

I just watched the second half of the ManU-Chelsea game. Drogba's goal was awesome, but Park's was even better!

I missed the first half because I was distributing flyers with a guy who I'm helping to run for Parliament (telling you this 'cause you know I wouldn't miss a game like this without a good reason). Glad I only missed the first half, though it must've been beautiful. I found the goal in Youtube. It wasn't as nice as the ones I saw as they happened, so I guess I was lucky.

I also checked the goal by Messi in Barca's game against Donetsk. It was the best goal today. Absolutely beautiful, he's even better than Drogba.

I'm glad ManU won. They simply were the better team. I hope they'll get to face Barcelona in the final.

Tottenham - Real Madrid round 2. BWAHAHAHA Fail Goalkeeping from Heurelho Gomes. 1-0 Real, 5-0 on aggregate. Oh deary deary me Spurs, it's all going wrong isn't it?

Meanwhile, it currently stands at Schalke 1-1 Inter Milan. Raul turning back the years for Schalke to score a very nicely taken goal, typical poacher's finish.

edited 13th Apr '11 1:09:27 PM by Saeglopur

Hilarious Gomes strikes again, lovely

One is reminded of Green's marvellous effort at the World Cup.

Sorry, English tropers!

Meh, I found Robert Green's cock-up just as hilarious as the rest of the world did. Well, in hindsight anyway. But wow, tonight's was a Gomes Classic, just like when he first joined Spurs and everyone thought he was the worst purchase in the club's history. BACK ON FORM.

Anyways, final scores, Tottenham 0-1 Real Madrid (aggregate 0-5), and Schalke 2-1 Inter Milan (aggregate 7-3). Your semi-finals are Real Madrid vs Barcelona (AWW YEEEAAH) and Man U vs Schalke (hmmmm, okay).

Don't go celebrating just yet, Man U fans. Schalke are clearly much better than many gave them credit for, what with a 7-3 aggregate trouncing of the title holders.

Though Inter sure is bad at the moment (I dunno what's gone into them this season), Schalke is indeed a mighty foe, certainly strong enough to challenge ManU for an interesting game.

But Barca versus Madrid... The mere thought of seeing that game brings tears to my eyes (well not really, but you get the picture.)

It's less what's got into them and more what's gone out. Namely Mourinho. They have an ageing team, and they sold their main 'wonderkid' Balotelli to Man City, where he is currently absolutely hated and reviled (and rightly so, he's a money-grabbing, violent, laddish arse). The rest of their young players are out on loan elsewhere in Serie A.

They are stuck in their ways, playing a redundant style of football that has been worked out and picked apart by more talented managers playing more inventive tactics. They're behind the far younger, more inventive and exciting Napoli in the table, which just about says it all.

I guess I should watch Serie A more often...

But it's almost never on the free channels in Finnish TV and no way in hell am I subscribing to pay channels ('cause I'd be stuck watching football for the rest of my life, which wouldn't be long because I'd never sleep.)

^^ Balotelli was a huge twat when with Inter, too. He even once went out in public wearing an AC Milan jersey!

What a douche. Which other footballers have proved themselves to be complete muppets?

I would argue that Nicklas Bendtner is up there, if only for his ridiculous egotism.

edited 13th Apr '11 4:42:42 PM by Saeglopur

Nigel de Jong, for kicking Xabi Alonso in the chest in the World Cup final, as well as the referee for not giving him a red card (he did receive a warning, though).

Seriously. Look at this.

^ van Bommel, in my opinion, had a worse track record for the entire tournament.

Anyway, Maradona is a fucking cunt, and he's fat, too!

edited 13th Apr '11 8:21:39 PM by SeanMurrayI

I was linked to this article just now by a friend and told to find what was wrong with it... looks pretty normal at first, but then you notice the URL [lol]

... I dunno how long that's gonna be up for so savour it. It's harsh, but someone at the Independent website seriously deserves a big fat high five for pulling this one

...Wow.

The Copa del Rey trophy getting crushed by a bus, in my opinion, was the funniest soccer story of the week.

So.....6-3 Real Madrid.....nasty.

^ I only caught the first half at a bar in an LAX terminal while my flight was delayed, so I saw the first four goals Madrid scored with ridiculous ease. Nice to know that Valencia changed things up in the second half; I do have a bit of a soft spot for that side.