Audience-Alienating Premise: The concept behind An Old Story, which is an elderly woman aging up two kids to marry them off to her friends, is a turn off for a lot of readers. While the whole Rape by Proxy angle is really Fridge Horror from adult readers projecting onto the story (there are a lot of stories aimed at children that have the villain trying to force one of the heroes to marry them), it still comes across as really icky regardless.
Squick: Charlie eating raw eggs might be hard to read about, depending on how strong your stomach is.
