The first ever episode. Broadcast 6 September 2002.
OAP Jack Jarvis is fed up with his inconsiderate neighbours and wants to move house. Best friend Victor McDade shoots down Jack's suggestion of moving in with him, but an opening comes up when Victor's next door neighbour dies, leaving the house empty.
Meanwhile, Winston Ingram is training his grandson, Joe, for an upcoming boxing match. The Craiglang locals mock Joe for his lack of talent.
Tropes:
- Boxing Episode: Joe, Winston's grandson, is an amateur boxer training for a fight with Barry Drummond. Joe has a severe lack of talent and fails. Miserably.
- Comically Missing the Point:Victor: Jesus, Jack; there’s a lassie on this tinnote . It’ll be well past its sell-by.Jack: Mind you, they didn’t put sell-by dates on them way back then.Victor: So it’ll be okay then?Jack: Oh aye.
- Comically Small Bribe: Jack and Victor try to bribe a housing officer with two £1 coins and a fiver.
- Early-Installment Weirdness: Being the pilot episode, several examples crop up. Firstly, Victor's son is referred to as "Jamie", but for the rest of the series, it is established that Victor's son is actually called John. Also, Boabby refers to a "Kelly-Ann", suggesting a family member/partner. All other episodes make it clear Boabby is a single man.
- Nice Guy: Jackie, the housing officer, is friendly and polite and although he knows he'll get into trouble for doing so, pulls a few strings to allow Jack Jarvis to move into the recently deceased Old Man Hannigan's vacated house.
- One-Steve Limit: Averted. The main character is name Jack Jarvis and a housing officer named Jackie.
