Quotes / Zap Dramatic

Have a pastry.

— Helen, inexplicably shifting the focus of a marriage counseling session to pastries

Mmmm, Helen makes the most sumptuous pastries!

— Yale in response to the above quote

Hi, My name's Jim. Put your hands in the air! What are you upset about?

— Jim the cop, looking like a complete idiot (this is actually the correct choice, by the way)

I can take my clothes off in the bathroom. Do you think I can take my clothes off here?

— Ted

Because I'm a terrorist!

— Duke Crabtree, in response to the question of why he has hijacked the player's cab

Objection, irrelevant!

Sustained! You're off the case!

— The prosecutor and the Judge (if you actually play Episode 10, be prepared to hear this or some variation of it a lot)

I'll blow us all to Hell!

— Practically Ted's Catchphrase in the first two episodes

The only ring I've got is around the collar. Suck on this, sinner!

— A cop after being asked if he's married, who responds to that query by shooting the player