Funny / Twister

• The MPAA description of the film’s PG-13 rating is worth a chuckle: Intense depiction of very bad weather.
• Jo and Bill are being chased by the Big Bad F5 Tornado. They run towards a farm and dodge fence pickets thrown by the tornado. A giant tractor flies at them and they duck under it. Then they run into a barn and realize that the owners stuffed it with scythes, pitchforks, and knives.
  Jo Harding: Oh my God, who are these people?
  Bill: ... I don't think so.
• "Where's my truck?" followed by an absolute deadpan of, "There it is" after it lands right in front of Melissa.
• In a bit of Black Comedy, Preacher cheers triumphantly as he grabs the loose air hose in the shelter during the drive-in tornado. Until a hubcap is thrown about by the wind and slices his head open, leaving him incoherent from the shock.
• Anything said by Dusty, who is a Cloud Cuckoo Lander and Large Ham.
• Bill's stubborn refusal to let Jo make use of his truck, grinning wildly as he knows exactly what she's thinking. Gilligan Cut to Jo, Bill, and Melissa leading the team with Dorothy II loaded in the back.
• "Cow."
  Melissa: I've gotta go, Julia, we've got cows!
  • Everything about that scene, from the trio's heads slowly turning to follow the cow's flight, to Melissa's expression when Jo says "Another cow" and Bill remarks that actually it's the same one.
• Melissa talking to a client while on the road.
  Melissa: "She did not marry your penis....Okay, she didn't only marry your penis."
• After they run through a house, a teddy bear smacks against the windshield, complete with a comical squeaky noise.
• At one point Bill and Jo are arguing about Melissa while driving. Bill begins to drift off-road leading to this quickfire gem.
  Jo: "Can I drive?"
  Bill: "No!"
  Jo: "Then will you?"
  Bill: *realizes they're off-road and about to hit a harvester* Holy shit!
  • Thanks to a hot mic on their radio, the other stormchasers in their convoy could hear the whole spat, and at one point, Haynes quips, "I think they're getting better at this." to which Beltzer nodded in agreement.
• After Jonas's team refuses to check on the hero team after the first tornado, Dusty runs up to their truck to taunt them for being late and even leans in through the front window and kisses the driver on the cheek to troll them even more.
• This entire exhcnage:
  Meg: "OK, I'll go, but I'm going to drive myself."
  "Honey, your car's in a tree around the corner."
  [Meg groans]
• The Suck Zone.
• Rabbit asking Meg where she got her current massive supply of beef:
  Rabbit: "God Meg, you got a lot of beef. Where'd you get all this beef?"
  Meg: "Did you see my cows out front?"
  Rabbit: "No... Oh!"
  • In a meta sense, the entire steak and eggs scene was director Jan De Bont's least favorite scene to film because of him being a vegetarian.
• The team shares a story to Melissa about how Bill garnered the nickname "The Extreme"; during a tornado, Bill, naked and drunk off his ass on Jack Daniels (Bill disputes the naked part), walked up to the twister and said "Have a drink!" and threw the bottle of Jack at it, being so close to the twister that the bottle never touched the ground before being picked up by the current.
  Bill: Honey, this is a tissue of lies; see, there was this other Bill, an 'evil Bill'. And I killed him.
  [the team cheers in approval]