Funny / Top Coppers

A page for description stand-out funny moments from Top Coppers.

"The Chill of the Cockney Freezer"

• "Not the filth!"
• After Rust is kicked out of Mahogany's car, he's shown stumbling around in a depressing montage, becoming more and dishevelled and beaten down. Then he runs into Mahogany again, where it's revealed it's only been thirty minutes.
• Mitch is inspired by how swans will always be there for their mates...and impressed by how they have a retractable penis.
• The mixture of hardened criminals (one of whom is called RIPete) and cockney workers in an ice-cream factor. One of them, Sandra, even gets involved in their shady activities, legitimately jolly and in good spirits all the while.

"The Girdle of Randall Rodgers"

• Randall Rodgers has an ego the size of Justice City, but a brain that's about as big as Rust's. He thinks that things like pizza delivery and barbers are exclusively for big-shot actors like him, completely ignoring Mahogany pointing out that he - a regular detective - does those things too.
• The Running Gag of the Chief trying to tell a story, but everyone walking away from him before he can finish - it even extends to the song!
• During the song in the middle of the episode, Mahogany makes a particularly sad face, and you'd think it's still because of Randall Rodgers' Broken Pedestal - until you listen to the lyrics and realise that Mahogany just shut his finger in the locker door.
• Mahogany has a "Eureka!" Moment about the Villain of the Week and races back into the station to tell everyone - only to arrive after the culprit has revealed himself and is holding the station hostage. Mahogany's frustration is palpable.
• The second actor to be interrogated regarding the case thinks his longtime nemesis, Randall, is behind a one-way mirror. Except it's an actual mirror, which he only figures out when he smashes it with a chair. The way the now empty frame falls forwards is perfect timing to end the mistake.

"The Venom of Dr Schäfer"

• The sheer fact that Dr Schäfer is played by an actor of Horrible Histories.
• Chief finds himself unable to move on from his dog's death. It doesn't help he keeps his stuffed body in his office.
  • What Isaac does to Chief's deceased dog.

"The Twist of the French Nicker"

• "There goes my sculpted physique. Really wish there had been someone to hear that."
  • And later, there is...when Rust makes the joke about a broken statue. Cliche can only protest he came up with it first.
• The case after Cliche starts out as a full-blown run, until the museum guard bellows "No running!". Cue the assembled detectives instead speed walking.
• The Retirony around Chief's old partner is so thick, you could cut it with a knife. His boat is called Hope I Don't Die, and he and Chief are hunting for a suspect having left his retirement party for Pete's sake.
  • As he lies dying, he asks Chief to hide something from his wife; a picture of him and a man in a romantic embrace.
    Chief: Yeah, probably a good idea.

"The Escape of Vince Rust"

• The epic fight between Mitch and Vince is pretty much just an overblown brotherly scuffle, complete with juvenile tactics like wet willies, "stop hitting yourself" and turning their phrases back on each other.

  "You're such a dick!"

• The Running Gag of the mayor being constantly caught in scandalous situations and his Blatant Lies that he uses to explain himself. It culminates in him and the press walking into the climax just as Mahogany yanks Vince's trousers down to expose his ass, a situation the mayor is completely uninvolved in but gets blamed anyway. His final appearance in the episode - and indeed the series, suggesting his political career is sunk - is him desperately claiming on TV about how he's "actually innocent this time - and all the other times!" He then apparently loses his temper as the announcement ends, viciously shouting at someone off-camera and trying to end on a winning smile.

"The Passion of the Chris"

• In much the same way as you'll recognize Dr Schäfer's actor, you might recognize Chief's rival police chief as Danny John-Jules, AKA The Cat.