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  • The description of Tech's day in 'A Blade is a Blade', pointing out his waking up ridiculously early, sitting on a six hour flight, and stopping a robbery. This statement is followed up by:
  • Tech's awkward conversation with the black market shopkeeper.
    Shopkeeper: Well, that depends. How much you got?
    Tech: Um...all of it?
    Shopkeeper: "All of it?
    Tech: Yes. All of the moneys. All of them.
  • Tech's first conversation with Alvono, and discussing why he's even stuck there in the first place.
    Alvono: Dude, his backpack has, like, all of the guns! I wouldn't even be able to get near it without being blasted to bits!
  • Aquadilus's reaction to Tech asking how the store's (non-existant) stocks are doing.
  • Warlord Kroz's confused frustration to how calm Tech and Aquadilus are when he announces his plans to battle Benjamin Tennyson for the Earth. The situation is not made any better when they start suggesting the places he destroys and/or visits first.
    Tech: I vote the first place you destroy is Mr. Smoothies, or at least the new mascot. Your thoughts, Aquadilus?
    Aquadilus: I hear there's a nice sushi place around 300 North. You should check that out while you're there.
  • Tech taking "offense" to Alvono saying that humans have no special abilities.
    Tech: Well now, that's hardly true. One of humanity's defining traits is the ability to adapt to any situation and then murder the crap out of it.
  • Tech reassuring Alvono that they won't be seen in the mine because nobody sane would be down there at night. Alvono then asks why they're there if that's the case.
    Tech: I thought we had previously established that I have issues. You're here because I'm paying you.
  • Tech brushing his teeth fifteen times and gulping down fifty-two breath mints in an unsuccessful attempt to get the taste of The Creature out of his mouth.
    • For the record, he ate The Creature as a two-story carnivorous plant alien. Whether that answers more questions than it raises is up for debate.
  • Alvono indignantly defending his lack of helpfulness by saying that he needs beauty sleep to keep up his winning complexion. Tech responds by giving him a glare so intense it actually sets the computer desk Alvono is sitting at on fire.
  • The Stinger at the end of 'Into The Pit' showing a nest woven from human bones, clothes, and a nametag that reads 'Dean'.
  • Pretty much everything Alvono says in 'Ready To...Rock?'.
    Alvono: I say we tackle him anyways.
    Tech: No.
    Alvono: Okay, we'll tackle him stealthily.
    Tech: Alvono, no.
    Alvono: Aawww...
  • After Tech regenerates an arm as Terminano, Igneoux takes the opportunity to make a couple of puns about it. Tech is not amused.
  • Tech and Alvono's yelling match about how bacon should be cooked. Made even funnier by the fact that Alvono technically doesn't even have a mouth, and has never had bacon in his life.
  • When checking out a customer, Aquadilus asks if they would like to donate to the "Interplanetary Hospital For Puppies, Orphans, and Puppy Orphans With Super Cancer”
    Customer: Super Cancer?
    Aquadilus It's like regular cancer, but super.
  • Tech introducing himself to The Inspector.
    Tech: Hey, I’ll have you know that I have multiple issues, not just teleportation sickness. To put it simply, my therapist is a rich man.
  • Tech begins chastising Kroz for using his powers to manipulate people's emotions, which leads to:
    Tech: Didn't your mother ever teach you any manners?
    Kroz: My mother attempted to eat me.
  • Tech lamenting how often he ends up defeating the Death Hounds by eating them, and snarking that if the pattern kept up, he would have to start an on-the-road cooking show. Starring Gordon Ramsey.
  • As Tech is on the ground, dying from having a hole blown through his chest, his only response is to flip the person who shot him the bird.
  • Tech's dying thoughts contain a good amount of morbid joking at his situation.
    Tech: So...I'm dying. Man, my parents are going to kill me.
    Tech: Oh, right, hole through the lungs. Not good for breathing-related activities.
    • After seeing his life flash before his eyes:
      Tech: Well, that was...disappointing.
  • The Void complaining that it's perceivable body is basically just a bunch of circles.
  • When Tech asks The Void why he's there:
    Tech: Next question: why am I here?
    The Void: Well, when a mother and father love each other very much-
  • After having his body restored to its healthy human form by the now-broken SpecTrix, Tech takes a moment to survey the area and ponder what just happened.
  • Tech listing off to Azmuth all the enemies he's made. Azmuth is not pleased.
  • Aquadilus and Tech arguing when the latter finally makes it back to Earth, which leads to this exchange:
    Aquadilus: We thought you were dead!
    Tech: I WAS dead!
    Aquadilus: ...
    Tech: ...
    Aquadilus: ...Say what?
    Aquadilus: That explains nothing.
  • Tech spews quite a bit of nonsense at once, getting Aquadilus to rage-quit the conversation and leave the room. After this happens, Tech pulls out a pocket calendar and puts down a checkmark for the week.
  • Tech getting progressively angrier at the stupidity of aliens actually being involved with the pyramids. Once he finally snaps, this happens:
    Tech: Onward, B-movie protagonists! We have a Sharknado to unleash Godzilla upon! Allons-y
    Igneoux (To the talking lion statue): I think you broke him.

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