Funny / Death on the Nile (1978)

• The exchanges of insults between Mrs. Van Schuyler (Bette Davis) and Miss Bowers (Dame Maggie Smith).
  Mrs. Van Schuyler: Come Bowers, it's time to go, this place is beginning to resemble a mortuary.
  Miss Bowers: Thank god you'll be in one yourself before too long, bloody old fossil.
  Mrs. Van Schuyler: Now, temper, temper, Bowers. What you need is a nice cool holiday. I was thinking of a trip through the Gobi Desert!
  • "[Bowers] did fifteen rounds once with Jack Dempsey. He was never the same man again."
• Any scene with the perpetually drunk Mrs. Otterbourne (Angela Lansbury).
  Mrs. Otterbourne: Do forgive me for butting in, but I have a bet with my daughter here, that you're Hercules Porridge, the famous French sleuth.
  Hercule Poirot: Not quite. I am Hercule Poirot, the famous Belgian sleuth.
• Race's reaction to Louise's opinion of the crime, after everyone has been commenting on how many different motives there are and how much they disliked the murder victim.
  Louise: Cette pauvre Madame Doyle! Tout le monde l'aimait.
  Poirot: She says that - er - all the world loved Madame Doyle.
  Race: Well, at least that's a fresh approach.
• In a Funny Background Event, Poirot does a quadruple jump in checkers, to a flabbergasted Col. Race.
• Poirot has a sleeping hair net and a sleeping mustache net.
• "Frankly, Mrs. Otterbourne, I don't consider being likened to a nymphomaniacal baboon flattering."
• Poirot asks Race to order him a plate of morilles. Race thinks he means moray, so Poirot arrives at dinner to find an eel on his plate.
  Poirot: I asked for a plate of morilles!
  Race: Well, what's that when it's at home?
  Poirot: Mushrooms!

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