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->''"If you're still in control, you're not going fast enough."''
-->-- '''Mario Andretti'''
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->Everyone knows New York traffic is a nightmare, but every New York driver knows to ''fear'' Boston drivers. If New York is ''Film/MadMax'' then Boston is ''Film/ThePurge''. No one is safe, traffic laws are meaningless, and the only goal is to survive as long as possible. When I told a Boston friend the drivers are nuts, she seriously told me that using your blinker is a sign of weakness. I laughed. ''She didn't.''
-->--'''Red''', ''WebAnimation/OverlySarcasticProductions''
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->How the hell did he manage that with an electrically-powered segway?
-->--'''[[http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-666-j SCP-666-J]]'''[[note]]captioned over an image of a [[StuffBlowingUp fiery explosion]][[/note]], ''Wiki/SCPFoundation''

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->I saw a pickup truck, with its horn blaring and its driver forming a sort of salute with one raised finger.\\

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->I saw a pickup truck, with its horn blaring and its driver [[FlippingTheBird forming a sort of salute with one raised finger.finger]].\\






[[folder:Theatre]]
->''Who’s that madman flying at full gallop down the street?\\
Who’s that madman knocking people over\\
Running people down\\
While his fine gentlemen\\
Hold on to their seats?''
-->-- "Balaga", ''Theatre/NatashaPierreAndTheGreatCometOf1812"
[[/folder]]



[[folder:Theatre]]
->''Who’s that madman flying at full gallop down the street?\\
Who’s that madman knocking people over\\
Running people down\\
While his fine gentlemen\\
Hold on to their seats?''
-->-- "Balaga", ''Theatre/NatashaPierreAndTheGreatCometOf1812"
[[/folder]]



->Even though giant toothy ball of batshit crazy Gary Busey is playing life on Expert Level at all times, sometimes he fucks up and backs his car into a person in the parking lot of a grocery store. We all make mistakes, but Gary Busey’s are just that much more WTF worthy... Instead of looking both ways behind him as he backed his car out of his parking spot, he was all ''“T.Y.I.G – trust your instincts, Gary”'' and just pulled out.\\\

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->Even though giant toothy ball of batshit crazy Gary Busey Creator/GaryBusey is playing life on Expert Level at all times, sometimes he fucks up and backs his car into a person in the parking lot of a grocery store. We all make mistakes, but Gary Busey’s are just that much more WTF worthy... Instead of looking both ways behind him as he backed his car out of his parking spot, he was all ''“T.Y.I.G – trust your instincts, Gary”'' and just pulled out.\\\
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->'''Ziva''': ''(Storms into the bullpen, muttering something in Hebrew underneath her breath)'' Unbelievable!\\

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->'''Ziva''': ''(Storms into the bullpen, [[ForeignLanguageTirade muttering something in Hebrew Hebrew]] underneath her breath)'' Unbelievable!\\
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->'''Heather:''' ''(at the moment driving a car)'' I thought we could fly to my place in the mountains!
'''Jon:''' FLY?!
'''Garfield:''' Two more miles per hour and THIS THING may take off!
'''Jon:''' But the airport is back in the other direction!
'''Heather:''' Yes... but MY private plane is over there!
''(The car finally comes to a screeching halt in front of said private plane)''

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->'''Heather:''' ''(at the moment driving a car)'' I thought we could fly to my place in the mountains!
mountains!\\
'''Jon:''' FLY?!
FLY?!\\
'''Garfield:''' Two more miles per hour and THIS THING may take off!
off!\\
'''Jon:''' But the airport is back in the other direction!
direction!\\
'''Heather:''' Yes... but MY private plane is over there!
there!\\
''(The car finally comes to a screeching halt in front of said private plane)''plane)''\\

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->'''Heather:''' I thought we could fly to my place in the mountains!

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->'''Heather:''' ''(at the moment driving a car)'' I thought we could fly to my place in the mountains!


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'''Jon:''' But the airport is back in the other direction!
'''Heather:''' Yes... but MY private plane is over there!
''(The car finally comes to a screeching halt in front of said private plane)''
'''Garfield:''' [[OhCrap Private plane?]] I think I just discovered the joys of WALKING...
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->'''Heather:''' I thought we could fly to my place in the mountains!
'''Jon:''' FLY?!
'''Garfield:''' Two more miles per hour and THIS THING may take off!
-->-- ''WesternAnimation/GarfieldAndFriends'', "Model Behavior"
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->''No short-cut is too dangerous. No risk goes untaken. When the Reckless Driver steers, the crew prays.''
-->--''Videogame/SunlessSkies''
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->(While being strafed by a fighter jet in ''VideoGame/GrandTheftAutoV) I'm trying to drive erratically, but it's no more or less erratic than I normally drive.
-->--'''Jane Douglas''', ''WebVideo/OutsideXbox''
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'''Wife''': Have you considered that possibly [[PeripheryHatedom this video wasn't made just for you]]? After all, you're not allowed to drive since [[NoodleIncident the incident]].\\

to:

'''Wife''': Have you considered that possibly [[PeripheryHatedom this video wasn't made just for you]]? you? After all, you're not allowed to drive since [[NoodleIncident the incident]].\\
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->''Woah'', Mrs. Ping! Every drive with you is like an adventure in almost ''dying!'' ...Don't get me wrong, though, you know, it's awesome.
-->-- Cam, ''WesternAnimation/{{Detentionaire}}''

to:

->''Woah'', ->''Whoa'', Mrs. Ping! Every drive with you is like an adventure in almost ''dying!'' ...Don't get me wrong, though, you know, it's awesome.
-->-- Cam, '''Cam''', ''WesternAnimation/{{Detentionaire}}''
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->''I just want you all to know that if you're ever on the highway behind me, I hear you honking, and I also don't want me to be doing what I'm doing. I don't like that I'm in that lane either, but I sure would like to get out of it.''
-->-- '''Creator/JohnMulaney'''
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[[folder:Theatre]]
->''Who’s that madman flying at full gallop down the street?\\
Who’s that madman knocking people over\\
Running people down\\
While his fine gentlemen\\
Hold on to their seats?''
-->-- "Balaga", ''Theatre/NatashaPierreAndTheGreatCometOf1812"
[[/folder]]
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->A car swerved slowly out of the lorry's way, its horn sounding - to nome ears - like the lost wail of a foghorn.\\
"Shouldn't be allowed on the road, drivers like that," said Angalo. There was a thump, and the remains of a street light bounced away. "[[ImplausibleDeniability And they put all this stupid stuff in the roadway, too]]," he added.\\
"Remember to show consideration for other road-users," said Masklin, severely.\\
"[[BlatantLies Well I am, aren't I?]] I'm not running into them, am I?" said Angalo. "What was that thump?"\\
"Some bushes, I think," said Masklin.\\
"See what I mean? Why do they put things like that in the road?"\\
"I think the road is more sort of over to your right," said Gurder.
-->--''[[Literature/NomesTrilogy Truckers]]''
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[[folder:Stand-Up Comedy]]
->[Australians] are warm-hearted, kind people, without exception. I've had my wallet returned twice, I've had people chase me down the street with ATM money I've left behind. Then you get in your cars, you become firebreathing psychopathic bloody maniacs! How does that work?! I'm terrified of driving in Australia! I've got people overtaking me, undertaking me, trucks trying to drive over the top of me! […] And since when did amber mean accelerate?! Everywhere else in the world, it means "proceed with caution"! Here, it means "floor it and turn the radio up"!
-->--'''Jeff Green''', [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PrzKjE8hF30 Melbourne International Comedy Festival 2011]]

[[/folder]]
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-->-- '''Creator/JohnMulaney''

to:

-->-- '''Creator/JohnMulaney''
'''Creator/JohnMulaney'''
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->''"I just want you all to know that if you're ever on the highway behind me, I hear you honking, and I also don't want me to be doing what I'm doing. I don't like that I'm in that lane either, but I sure would like to get out of it."''
-->-- '''Creator/JohnMulaney''
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->'''Andrew''': Season 10. Canada's Worst Driver is on the road. I'd get off it if I were you.
-->-- Host Andrew Younghusband, introducing the tenth season of ''Series/CanadasWorstDriver''
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[[folder: Comic Books]]

->'''Constantine:''' Fucking ''hell'', Chas! They drive on the right! The ''right!''
->'''Chas:''' Don't panic, John. It's a learning curve.
->'''Constantine:''' Yeah, well, I don't wanna be here when it flattens out!
->[''CLANK BUNK WHUMP'']
->'''Chas:''' Sorry. That was the brake.
-->--''ComicBook/{{Hellblazer}}: All His Engines''

[[/folder]]
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[[folder:Radio]]

->'''Hex:''' ...We made it!
->'''Ace:''' If you're gonna make a crack about WomenDrivers, I should warn you: [[ContinuityNod I've got a baseball bat]] in my room.
->'''Hex:''' I wasn't gonna say a word... though I've learned one thing today.
->'''Ace:''' What's that?
->'''Hex:''' That the TARDIS has a spin cycle.
->'''Ace:''' Ha ha. Very funny.
-->--''AudioPlay/BigFinishDoctorWho: [[Recap/BigFinishDoctorWho162ProtectAndSurvive Protect And Survive]]''

[[/folder]]

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->'''Jake:''' Get off the sidewalk, you lunatic!



<He has experience.>\\

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<He <[[ExactWords He has experience.>\\]]>\\



-->-- Marco drives to a meat-packing plant, ''{{Literature/Animorphs}}'', "The Experiment''

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-->-- Marco drives a truck full of cows to a meat-packing plant, ''{{Literature/Animorphs}}'', "The Experiment''
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'''Nyamo''': [[DeadpanSnarker Isn't it better for fewer people to die]]?

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'''Nyamo''': [[DeadpanSnarker Isn't it better for fewer people to die]]?die?]]



They shot over the edge and onto the tracks at over 120 kph, to the chorus of the Children screaming in alarm. The darkness of the train tunnel into the Geofront loomed in front of them, angling steeply down.

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They shot over the edge and onto the tracks at over 120 kph, to the chorus of the Children [[OhCrap screaming in alarm.alarm]]. The darkness of the train tunnel into the Geofront loomed in front of them, angling steeply down.



''They made it to Misato’s apartment in record time again, screeching to a halt in a backward power slid into a parking space that violated at least two laws of physics and, Shinji thought, at least one of causality, but didn’t appear to implode the universe.''

to:

''They made it to Misato’s apartment in record time again, screeching to a halt in a backward power slid slide into a parking space that violated at least two laws of physics and, Shinji thought, at least one of causality, but didn’t appear to implode the universe.''
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->'''ComicBook/JeanGrey:''' You know. We don't have to take the bus. I could drive us to where ever we're going.\\
'''[[ComicBook/{{Cyclops}} Scott Summers]]:''' I would really like to get there alive, thanks.\\
'''Jean:''' My driving isn't that bad.\\
'''Scott:''' Most people don't take turns on two wheels. Not to mention almost running down two of her teammates who were walking up the drive, minding their own business, while she was going ninety miles an hour. I don't think Hank and Bobby are ever going to recover. Every time they see you blasting up the drive now, they instinctively dive for cover.\\
'''Jean:''' I don't know why all of you are making such a big deal about this. I didn't hit them.\\
'''Scott:''' Only because both of them dove into a ditch to avoid the path of your oncoming car. You know, most people try to steer the car away from pedestrians not towards them. Then there was the time you knocked Warren's side mirror off, and glued it back on with Super Glue. Or the time you managed to get that huge scratch along the side of the professor's Buick and tried it hide it with six bottles of nail polish.\\
'''Jean:''' Okay, okay. Quit the ragging.\\
'''Scott:''' Somebody has to; Hank's too traumatized to do it since you almost ran him down.
-->--''Fanfic/XMenTheEarlyYears''
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->'''Liara:''' Truck!
->'''Shepard:''' I know.
->'''Liara:''' ''Truck!!''
->'''Shepard:''' ''I know!''
->'''Liara:''' ''Ahhhhhh!''
->'''Shepard:''' There we go.
->'''Liara:''' ''You're enjoying this!''
-->-- Exchange from ''VideoGame/MassEffect2''
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-->-- Cam, ''WesternAnimation/{{Detentionaire}}

to:

-->-- Cam, ''WesternAnimation/{{Detentionaire}}
''WesternAnimation/{{Detentionaire}}''
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->''Woah'', Mrs. Ping! Every drive with you is like an adventure in almost ''dying!'' ...Don't get me wrong, though, you know, it's awesome.
-->-- Cam, ''WesternAnimation/{{Detentionaire}}
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->This month is all about doing the impossible in Alabama.\\\
It snowed here last week.\\
[[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/United_States_Senate_special_election_in_Alabama,_2017 We elected a democrat this week.]]\\
Next week, we will finally learn how to use a turn signal.
-->-- '''The Ostrich''', [[https://twitter.com/ALostrich/status/940983886477185024 Twitter]]
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'''Obi-Wan:''' I don't mind flying, but you're committing suicide!

to:

'''Obi-Wan:''' I don't mind flying, but what you're committing doing is suicide!
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[[folder:Webcomics]]

->'''Sam:''' Bottom line. How safe is a .2 millirem dose [of radiation]? \\
'''Florence:''' It's safer than driving with you across town. \\
'''Helix:''' Florence, standing in a burning building while blind circus midgets throw knives at you is safer than driving across town with Sam. \\
'''Florence:''' You're right. Bad example.
-->-- ''Webcomic/{{Freefall}}''

[[/folder]]

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