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** Shouldn't this be in WildMassGuessing?
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* I'm still not sure how the SAINT robots would be a viable weapon. Were they supposed to replace conventional human soldiers? I can't really think of a military role that they could fill better than what we have now. The lasers are pretty cool, but you could mount them on a vehicle just as easily. And $11 million is a pretty hefty price tag, comparable to an A-10 Thunderbolt, which could easily destroy dozens of robots.
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**** Actually, the S.A.I.N.T. robots were designed to transport nuclear weapons, hence ''Nuclear'' Transport." It doesn't necessarily mean they're nuclear powered. It's possible that the laser weapons are either a) far too heavy for humans to carry around or b) too dangerous due to heat or contamination of some sort. Also in the second movie, Johnny 5 tells Ben that his new battery is an "improvement on your design. Cut the bugs out." meaning that his original battery was inefficient.

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**** Actually, the S.A.I.N.T. robots were designed to transport nuclear weapons, hence ''Nuclear'' "''Nuclear'' Transport." It doesn't necessarily mean they're nuclear powered. It's possible that the laser weapons are either a) far too heavy for humans to carry around or b) too dangerous due to heat or contamination of some sort. Also in the second movie, Johnny 5 tells Ben that his new battery is an "improvement on your design. Cut the bugs out." meaning that his original battery was inefficient.
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** Oh look, it's someone turning something loveable from their childhood all grimdark. [[AustinPowers There's nothing worse than an aging hipster...]]
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** Actually, if you watch, they try to have him do the shutdown command a few times when they remote link in. It doesn't work because #5 is working off his own programming now and doesn't want to shut down. They basically thought they had a working software failsafe and just didn't think a hardware one was necessary.
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Removed because Headscratchers isn\'t a place for random bitching. (It was my bitching in the first place, so I feel justified in removing it.)


* One of the main characters is played by a white guy in {{Blackface}}. Newton Crosby is only satisfied that No. 5 is sentient after the machine laughs at a joke about how [[GreedyJew Jewish people are stingy.]] UnfortunateImplications doesn't cover it.
** It's not blackface.
*** "Sikhface" being as yet a fairly unknown term, "blackface" manages to get the image across while highlighting its cultural insensitivity. I stand by it.
**** It's not even "sikhface." It's a makeup job that attempts to make a white actor look like a South Asian character. Whereas blackface is a makeup job designed to turn a white actor into a stock ''caricature''. A white actor made up to look like a realistic black character (within the limits of makeup artistry) would not be blackface, either. It may be offensive, especially if played four laughs, but it's not even on the same ''planet'' as actual blackface.
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****It's not even "sikhface." It's a makeup job that attempts to make a white actor look like a South Asian character. Whereas blackface is a makeup job designed to turn a white actor into a stock ''caricature''. A white actor made up to look like a realistic black character (within the limits of makeup artistry) would not be blackface, either. It may be offensive, especially if played four laughs, but it's not even on the same ''planet'' as actual blackface.
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** The military in movies, from the 60s on down, is almost ''proud'' of their nuclear deterrent force's lack of any such measure - which the Russkies might use to somehow thwart "Operation Gotcha Last" - right up to the moment that The Unthinkable Happens and There's Nothing We Can Do To Stop It. The only difference between this and all the other times is that (they believe) the robot's off to laser some Americans rather than bomb Moscow and start WW3.
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*** "Sikhface" being as yet a fairly unknown term, "blackface" manages to get the image across while highlighting its cultural insensitivity. I stand by it.
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** It's not blackface.

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Thought this merited a little expansion. In short: yeah, I was joking.


*** I'm proposing transforming a family-friendly (well, apart from the racism, that is...) romantic comedy series about a gentle, pop-culture-quoting robot into an ultra-gritty cyberpunk thriller, and your main objection is that ''it's been done before?'' Well, if it helps, maybe Newton Crosby could show up in the third act with a suit of powered armor...
** Dude, it's a comedy, not a cyber punk movie.



** Dude, it's a comedy, not a cyber punk movie.
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*** [[spoiler:Dude, DontExplainTheJoke!]]

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*** [[spoiler:Dude, DontExplainTheJoke!]][[spoiler:DontExplainTheJoke!]]
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*** [[spoiler:Dude, DontExplainTheJoke!]]
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** He metabolizes resources to stay functional (electricity), responds to external stimuli, and he can reproduce another entity similar to himself that could be subject to some sort of selection (i.e., there's a hereditable instruction set for his anatomy). Pretty much all the qualifications for 'life' right there. The real question is why he doesn't create a duplicate that he keeps powered down but backs up his memory to every night. If the one out in the field were to 'disassemble', the backup could be woken up and Johnny wouldn't lose more than a few hours of his life.
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** Dude, it's a comedy, not a cyber punk movie.
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** So, let's see what science-fiction says about the future. Either [[{{Terminator}} robots have taken over]], [[CaptainPowerAndTheSoldiersOfTheFuture robots have taken over]], [[TheMatrix robots have taken over]], [[IRobot robots have taken over]] or [[PowerRangersRPM robots have taken over]]. What was your plot about, again?
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** My reading of the situation was that the SAINT models being displayed were technology demonstrators and prototypes, not intended for actual deployment. The demonstration being given was to show off what their technology demonstrators could do and secure government funding for a ruggedised weaponised version that would be of actual use on the front line.
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** Thousands of years of philosophical, scientific and religious debate still hasn't given us a definition of life that can be universally applied. Single-celled organisms, for example, are obviously alive, but they don't learn, they have no intelligence, could never be sentient and can only react to stimulus by reflex actions built into them. They are considered alive because they can reproduce on their own. But mules, a donkey-horse cross-breed, are incapable of reproduction as they are sterile. As they can't reproduce does that mean that they are not alive? And what of virii? There is still fierce debate raging as to whether they constitute a life-form or non-living masses of genetic material. Clearly we have a way to go before we have a definition of life that is entirely satisfactory.
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* One of the main characters is played by a white guy in {{Blackface}}. Newton Crosby is only satisfied that No. 5 is sentient after the machine laughs at a joke about how [[GreedyJew Jewish people are stingy.]] UnfortunateImplications doesn't cover it.
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* ''The year: 2011. Twenty-three years ago, SAINT No. "Johnny" 5 was legally declared alive and granted US citizenship. Three years ago, Ben Jahrvi's company -- formerly a manufacturer of children's toys, more recently a manufacturer of domestic and industrial robots -- closed in disgrace after accusations of robot slavery, and millions of sentient machines have entered society. However, anti-robot discrimination and violence are running rampant, and robots speak in hushed whispers of a savior named Saint John who will come and lead them to equality. Meanwhile, Jahrvi's factories have mysteriously begun operating again... and their new owner, a heavily modified SAINT-model robot, has plans that ''don't'' involve human-robot equality. ''Short Circuit 3.'' Revolution is not a malfunction.'' And they're doing a remake instead? Man, [[TheyWastedAPerfectlyGoodPlot They Wasted A Perfectly Good]] CyberPunk [[TheyWastedAPerfectlyGoodPlot Plot.]]

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* ''The year: 2011. Twenty-three years ago, SAINT No. "Johnny" 5 was legally declared alive and granted US citizenship. Three years ago, Ben Jahrvi's company -- formerly a manufacturer of children's toys, more recently a manufacturer of domestic and industrial robots -- closed in disgrace after accusations of robot slavery, and millions of sentient machines have entered society. However, anti-robot discrimination and violence are running rampant, and robots speak in hushed whispers of a savior named Saint John who will come and lead them to equality. Meanwhile, Jahrvi's factories have mysteriously begun operating again... and their new owner, again under the supervision of a heavily modified SAINT-model robot, has robot whose plans that ''don't'' involve human-robot equality. ''Short Circuit 3.'' Revolution is not a malfunction.'' And they're doing a remake instead? Man, [[TheyWastedAPerfectlyGoodPlot They Wasted A Perfectly Good]] CyberPunk [[TheyWastedAPerfectlyGoodPlot Plot.]]
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* ''The year: 2011. Twenty-three years ago, SAINT No. "Johnny" 5 was legally declared alive and granted US citizenship. Today, Ben Jahrvi's company -- formerly a manufacturer of children's toys, more recently a manufacturer of domestic and industrial robots -- has closed in disgrace after accusations of robot slavery, and millions of sentient machines are entering society. However, anti-robot discrimination is running rampant, and robots speak in hushed whispers of a savior named Saint John who will come and lead them to equality. ''Short Circuit 3.'' Revolution is not a malfunction.'' And they're doing a remake instead? Man, [[TheyWastedAPerfectlyGoodPlot They Wasted A Perfectly Good]] CyberPunk [[TheyWastedAPerfectlyGoodPlot Plot.]]

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* ''The year: 2011. Twenty-three years ago, SAINT No. "Johnny" 5 was legally declared alive and granted US citizenship. Today, Three years ago, Ben Jahrvi's company -- formerly a manufacturer of children's toys, more recently a manufacturer of domestic and industrial robots -- has closed in disgrace after accusations of robot slavery, and millions of sentient machines are entering have entered society. However, anti-robot discrimination is and violence are running rampant, and robots speak in hushed whispers of a savior named Saint John who will come and lead them to equality. Meanwhile, Jahrvi's factories have mysteriously begun operating again... and their new owner, a heavily modified SAINT-model robot, has plans that ''don't'' involve human-robot equality. ''Short Circuit 3.'' Revolution is not a malfunction.'' And they're doing a remake instead? Man, [[TheyWastedAPerfectlyGoodPlot They Wasted A Perfectly Good]] CyberPunk [[TheyWastedAPerfectlyGoodPlot Plot.]]

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* Okay, elevator pitch.
->The year: 2011. Twenty-three years ago, SAINT No. "Johnny" 5 was legally declared alive and granted US citizenship. Today, Ben Jahrvi's company -- formerly a manufacturer of children's toys, more recently a manufacturer of domestic and industrial robots -- has closed in disgrace after accusations of robot slavery, and millions of sentient machines are entering society. However, anti-robot discrimination is running rampant, and robots speak in hushed whispers of a savior named Saint John who will come and lead them to equality. ''Short Circuit 3.'' Revolution is not a malfunction.
** And they're doing a remake instead? Man, [[TheyWastedAPerfectlyGoodPlot They Wasted A Perfectly Good]] CyberPunk [[TheyWastedAPerfectlyGoodPlot Plot.]]

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* Okay, elevator pitch.
->The
''The year: 2011. Twenty-three years ago, SAINT No. "Johnny" 5 was legally declared alive and granted US citizenship. Today, Ben Jahrvi's company -- formerly a manufacturer of children's toys, more recently a manufacturer of domestic and industrial robots -- has closed in disgrace after accusations of robot slavery, and millions of sentient machines are entering society. However, anti-robot discrimination is running rampant, and robots speak in hushed whispers of a savior named Saint John who will come and lead them to equality. ''Short Circuit 3.'' Revolution is not a malfunction.
**
malfunction.'' And they're doing a remake instead? Man, [[TheyWastedAPerfectlyGoodPlot They Wasted A Perfectly Good]] CyberPunk [[TheyWastedAPerfectlyGoodPlot Plot.]]

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* The year: 2011. Twenty-three years ago, SAINT No. "Johnny" 5 was legally declared alive and granted US citizenship. Today, Ben Jahrvi's company -- formerly a manufacturer of children's toys, more recently a manufacturer of domestic and industrial robots -- has closed in disgrace after accusations of robot slavery, and millions of sentient machines are entering society. However, anti-robot discrimination is running rampant, and robots speak in hushed whispers of a savior named Saint John who will come and lead them to equality. ''Short Circuit 3.'' Revolution is not a malfunction. And they're doing a remake instead? Man, [[TheyWastedAPerfectlyGoodPlot They Wasted A Perfectly Good]] CyberPunk [[TheyWastedAPerfectlyGoodPlot Plot.]]

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* The Okay, elevator pitch.
->The
year: 2011. Twenty-three years ago, SAINT No. "Johnny" 5 was legally declared alive and granted US citizenship. Today, Ben Jahrvi's company -- formerly a manufacturer of children's toys, more recently a manufacturer of domestic and industrial robots -- has closed in disgrace after accusations of robot slavery, and millions of sentient machines are entering society. However, anti-robot discrimination is running rampant, and robots speak in hushed whispers of a savior named Saint John who will come and lead them to equality. ''Short Circuit 3.'' Revolution is not a malfunction. malfunction.
**
And they're doing a remake instead? Man, [[TheyWastedAPerfectlyGoodPlot They Wasted A Perfectly Good]] CyberPunk [[TheyWastedAPerfectlyGoodPlot Plot.]]

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*** That still doesn't quite explain why there are spares of the central memory module in the NOVA vans. The ''one part'' that is essentially irreplaceable, and yet there's at least one in the van, because Number Five was able to build a complete duplicate of himself--albeit admittedly, it was only programmed to run away while screaming
incoherently.

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*** That still doesn't quite explain why there are spares of the central memory module in the NOVA vans. The ''one part'' that is essentially irreplaceable, and yet there's at least one in the van, because Number Five was able to build a complete duplicate of himself--albeit admittedly, it was only programmed to run away while screaming
screaming incoherently.


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* The year: 2011. Twenty-three years ago, SAINT No. "Johnny" 5 was legally declared alive and granted US citizenship. Today, Ben Jahrvi's company -- formerly a manufacturer of children's toys, more recently a manufacturer of domestic and industrial robots -- has closed in disgrace after accusations of robot slavery, and millions of sentient machines are entering society. However, anti-robot discrimination is running rampant, and robots speak in hushed whispers of a savior named Saint John who will come and lead them to equality. ''Short Circuit 3.'' Revolution is not a malfunction. And they're doing a remake instead? Man, [[TheyWastedAPerfectlyGoodPlot They Wasted A Perfectly Good]] CyberPunk [[TheyWastedAPerfectlyGoodPlot Plot.]]

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*** That still doesn't quite explain why there are spares of the central memory module in the NOVA vans. The ''one part'' that is essentially irreplaceable, and yet there's at least one in the van, because Number Five was able to build a complete duplicate of himself--albeit admittedly, it was only programmed to run away while screaming incoherently.

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*** That still doesn't quite explain why there are spares of the central memory module in the NOVA vans. The ''one part'' that is essentially irreplaceable, and yet there's at least one in the van, because Number Five was able to build a complete duplicate of himself--albeit admittedly, it was only programmed to run away while screaming screaming
incoherently.
**** because it's ''not'' irreplaceable. They have no idea Number Five is sentient and they would need that part to repair him if me memory was damaged (which is their assumptions as to ''why'' he went rogue in the first place) but his body is basically intact.


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* Speaking of the S.A.I.N.T. Robots and their weaponry, why the hell don't they have a remote failsafe shutoff, at least for the laser alone?
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** As their powerful, accurate, narrowly-directed weapon and opening scene of the first movie indicate, the SAINT robots are expected to rumble with enemy vehicles rather than infantry. Presumably, a tank round would take down a SAINT no matter how much armor it had anyways, so they decided to make them glass cannons with little defense, both because it is cheaper and because less armor makes them faster and more agile, improving their chances of survival.
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** If I'm not mistaken, when he was given a larger role in the second movie, the decision was made to change his name from the patently ridiculous "Jabituya" (say it out loud) for the more realistic--and more importantly, less racist--"Jahrvi." Considering that Ben is already played by a white guy in makeup, which is really no better than a white guy wearing blackface, it was probably a wise choice.
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** Aside from the fact that most of the damage done by the jewel thieves involved hitting J5's weak spots, in the first film we did in fact see standard rounds damage him. Remember, SAINT was designed to bring a nuke right to Insert Commie Here's front door in 30 minutes or less or your money back; the things already cost eleven million apiece. Adding excessive armor to their standard steel and titanium "skin" would be an even bigger waste of taxpayer money. Not that this has ever stopped the Pentagon in the past, but...at least it ''kind of'' makes sense. (There's also the possibility that the production model of SAINT ''would'' have had more durable exterior armor.)
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*** That still doesn't quite explain why there are spares of the central memory module in the NOVA vans. The ''one part'' that is essentially irreplaceable, and yet there's at least one in the van, because Number Five was able to build a complete duplicate of himself--albeit admittedly, it was only programmed to run away while screaming incoherently.

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