History Funny / MurderOnTheOrientExpress2017

-->'''Bouc:''' Ah, you only have me for an hour. I ride on the Orient Express at 7--official "director" business. Uncle pays me ''absurdly'' to stay onboard his ''gorgeous'' train and [[ReassignedToAntarctica far away from him at the home office,]] consigned to wine and dine handsome officials for all eternity. [[DoWrongRight There is an art to nepotism]].
-->'''Poirot:''' [[StealthInsult And you are its]] ''Michaelangelo!''

--->'''Bouc:''' Ah, you only have me for an hour. I ride on the Orient Express at 7--official "director" business. Uncle pays me ''absurdly'' to stay onboard his ''gorgeous'' train and [[ReassignedToAntarctica far away from him at the home office,]] consigned to wine and dine handsome officials for all eternity. [[DoWrongRight There is an art to nepotism]].
--->'''Poirot:''' [[StealthInsult And you are its]] ''Michaelangelo!''

* Bouc explains to the prostitute that he has long been friends with the famous Poirot (before he was "the esteemed Poirot," even) because he never asks Poirot anything about his cases because he doesn't care, and Poirot in turn never judges him for being a ''[[InformedAttribute terrible]]'' person.
* Bouc explains why he can't join Poirot for a meal:
--->'''Bouc:''' Ah, you only have me for an hour. I ride on the Orient Express at 7--official "director" business. Uncle pays me ''absurdly'' to stay onboard his ''gorgeous'' train and [[ReassignedToAntartica far away from him at the home office,]] consigned to wine and dine handsome officials for all eternity. [[DoWrongRight There is an art to nepotism]].
--->'''Poirot:''' [[StealthInsult And you are its]] ''Michaelangelo!''

-->'''Debenham:''' I always liked a good rosé.

-->'''Poirot:''' You were fond of him?\\

-->'''Bouc:''' ''[first sees Ratchet's dead body]'' Good God. First the snow, and now this. [[SkewedPriorities I'll have to make a statement at some grimy police station]].
-->'''Poirot:''' A man has died.\\

* Poirot trying to make Ratchett's dessert even.
* One of the reasons Poirot won't protect Ratchett? He doesn't like his face. No, literally. He doesn't like how there's a scar on one side of Ratchett's face.

--> '''Poirot:''' *lying on the floor of his compartment in a daze* Did we die?

-->'''Poirot:''' Did he have any enemies?
-->'''[=MacQueen=]:''' Pick a number.

-->'''Poirot:''' You were fond of him?
-->'''[=MacQueen=]:''' I was fond of his ''money''.

--> '''Poirot:''' A man has died.
--> '''Bouc:''' And a man has died.

* While solving the case of a stolen holy artifact, Poirot doesn't hesitate to mention the irony that the three suspects happen to be [[StockShticks a priest, a rabbi and an imam]].

* On his way to a crime scene, Poirot accidentally steps in camel excrement. It's not stepping in the poop that bothers him, it's the [[SuperOCD "imbalance"]]. And so, he hesitantly proceeds to step his ''other'' foot in the poop.

* One of the reasons Poirot won't protect Ratchett? He doesn't like his face. No, literally. He doesn't like [[SuperOCD how there's a scar on one side of Ratchett's face]].

* During his interrogation, Gerhard talking bad about different races, mentioning the Belgians. Given Poirot is Belgian himself, Gerhard realizes he's DiggingHimselfDeeper and shuts up. But already, Poirot has a wide-eyed, offended frown as though thinking "''Excuse me''?" It's even funnier when you realize [[spoiler:he was doing it deliberately.]]

!!Meta
* Johnny Depp was clearly having the time of his life playing the unrepentant gangster.

* On his way to a crime scene, Poirot accidentally steps in.. camel excrement. It's not stepping in the poop that bothers him, it's the [[SuperOCD "Imbalance"]]. And so, he hesitantly proceeds to step his ''other'' foot in the poop.

* Ina DeletedScene: The reason Poirot appears to be far more slender than his usual appearance? [[OfCorsetHurts He wears a very tight corset that isn't very comfortable.]]

* Poirot laughing while reading his books. It feels relateable, reading something funny in a good book. Better yet, it's a book by Creator/CharlesDickens.

* During his interrogation, Gerhard talking bad about different races, mentioning the Belgians. Given Poirot is Belgian himself, Gerhard realizes he's DiggingHimselfDeeper and shuts up. But already, Poirot has a wide-eyed, offended frown as though thinking "''Excuse me''?"