History Funny / AdoptedDisplaced

* When the Equestrians come for Fluttershy the first kill she gets is [[DidYouJustPunchOutCthulhu Discord]]. She headshots him but doesn't get a kill notification and he casually regenerates hid head. Her response is a PrecisionFStrike about him being a cheater, just like anyone else who's playing shooter would when a certain kill does jack squat.

* While looking for books on how to care for Twilight Ratcher passes on one called ''WesternAnimation/MyLittlePonyFriendshipIsMagic'', declaring it useless. Oh if only he knew.

* When asked why she doesn't work for Gadgetron Twilight responds "[[LooneyTune I'm only three and a half years old]]."
* Twilight says she wants to make things explode for a living and Ratchet jovially asks her to include him. She's actually being literal and brings out the paperwork for Gadgetron. She's gleeful at getting to explode stuff but Ratcher points out that he's doing the actual work while she just designs, which leads to this line:

* Kyubi, Henriette's answer to Carmelita, not only proves to be essentially a male counterpart to Carmelita but pairs this with basically being a cop version of [[Film/PiratesOfTheCaribbean Captain Jack Sparrow and reenacts the "Why Is The Rum Gone?" scene while drunk]].

*

* After Coco foils Suri's scheme and returns Rarity's fabric, Rarity admits she should have seen the possibility and thanks Coco, saying she can see Coco isn't the type to do such things. Coco gasps and avows ""Oh, I'd never do that! That would be stealing, and that's just wrong!" Then Coco's narration informs "I ''really'' could have done without all the derisive laughter in my ears right then...even if it ''did'' help me keep up the flustered act through the rest of the show."

* Medic apparently ran into the [[HellsingUltimateAbridged abridged version of]] [[{{Hellsing}} Alucard]] one Halloween.
* Spy's gift is a bowler hat, which he notes isn't really his style. He gets told to throw it and finds out it's an [[{{Goldfinger}} Oddjob bowler]].

* Ratchet creates a diaper changing machine to change Twilight but she hates it. Ratchet says that she can stop using it once she's potty trained. She promptly trains herself so she doesn't have to use the machine.

* The RED team dresses up as Santa and his reindeer. Hilarious enough on it's own but Fluttershy asking Spy as a reindeer if he can really fly is gold.

* The Equestrians meeting Chompy. Only Luna isn't freaked out and doesn't see what's so bad... until she sees it's tongue. She notes that she's fought ''and'' created untold horrors and what she just saw scares her. Even Discord gets spooked and hides behind Luna form that one, even grabbing Demoman's canteen [[DrowningMySorrows to cope]].

* The fact that this story involves the characters from Machinima/RedVsBlue guarantees that there will be plenty of funny moments in this story. And let's face it, a crossover with Red vs Blue requires it's own page dedicated to the funny moments:

* The fact that this story involves the characters from Machinima/RedVsBlue guarantees that there will be plenty of funny moments in this story. For the full list:

* The fact that this story involves the characters from Machinima/RedVsBlue guarantees that there will be plenty of funny moments in this story.
* In the first chapter, when Church first finds filly!Maud, she clings onto his arm so tightly that the the armor gets crushed, establishing her as a PintSizePowerhouse.
--> '''Church:''' And Captain, I'm going to need a replacement arm for my armor. Maud kind of crushed it.
--> '''Captain Flowers:''' ...she did what now?
* When Tucker, [[LovableSexManiac being Tucker]], first meets Maud, he starts saying innuendos followed by his infamous "[[CatchPhrase Bow Chika Bow Wow!]]" in no time. Maud then calmly walks up to him and casually threatens him with a groan attack. Tucker doesn't buy it and [[TemptingFate asks how she could hurt him through his armor]]. She then punches his ankle, shattering the metal, along with the ankle itself. Church certainly enjoyed it.
--> '''Tucker:''' (''While clutching his ankle in pain'') -OH MY GOD! Medic!
* When Church takes Maud to explore the cliffs, she begins to dig a hole to get to the caves (with Captain Flowers told them not to go until Maud was old enough). Then [[AxeCrazy Sage]] shows up.
** And when Sarge first sees Maud:
---> '''Sarge:''' (''in a strangely soft voice'') ...that is the most adorable mining tool I've ever seen.
---> '''Maud:''' Thanks.
---> '''Sarge:''' It talks! (''points his shotgun at her, only for Church to grab it'')
---> '''Church:''' Point that thing at me all you want! [[PapaWolf But don't you]] ''[[PapaWolf dare]]'' [[PapaWolf point it at my daughter!]]
---> '''Sarge:''' Your...daughter?
---> '''Church:''' That's right. And she's a living, thinking being, not a mining tool...
---> '''Maud:''' (''Maud picked a rock out of her mane, finds gem fragments within it, splits it open and [[ExtremeOmnivore licks the gem vein before crunching on the two halves]]'')
---> '''Church:''' ...however effective she is as one...
---> '''Sarge:''' [[LampshadeHanging Did...did she just eat a rock?]]
---> '''Church:''' Yeah, I was pretty surprised by that, too.
* There's also Sarge's attempts to not curse whenever Maud's around. Like when he first sees her eat a rock, he says [[LastSecondWordSwap badaaaaaaaples]], clearly intent on saying "badass". Also:
--> '''Sarge:''' (''to Church'') Why didn't you tell me there was a minor with you before I started cussing you out, dam dirty Blue? (''to Maud'') Dam as in the construction used to block a river, which is what I'm going to use the bodies of my Blue enemies to build, which is why it applies!
--> '''Sarge:''' What 'n (''sees Maud'') Helllllllllll's name is going on here? Hel being the Norse Goddess of the Dead, and short for Helheim, the Norse Underworld. Not a bad word, and totally alright to swear by if you're of Nordic decent, and you can't prove I'm not at least 5% Nordic!
* When Sarge threatens to shoot Church, he can't bring himself to do it with Maud watching. So, he begins to ask them to wait while he go gets Grif to do it for him. Maud punches him in the ankle for his troubles.
--> '''Sarge:''' OH MY ACHILLES!
** Church notices that Maud punched Tucker full forced, while she held back when she punched Sarge. Maud's response is that "family should know better." Church then notes that she's so much like Tex.
* Maud apparently has more in common with Pinkie Pie then she knows, as after meeting Sarge, she [[OffscreenTeleportation somehow ends up in Red Base.]]
** At Red Base, [[ThoseTwoGuys Grif and Simmons]] are standing around and talking, like always. Then Grif says that a pony just broke it.
---> '''Simmons:''' Pony? What pony?
---> '''Maud:''' Me.
---> '''Simmons:''' (''looks down and see Maud'') Grif, there's a talking pony in the base! How did that happen?
---> '''Grif:''' You're asking me? I thought I was making it up to mess with you!
** Maud continues to [[OffscreenTeleportation teleport]] while in Red Base, appearing in Simmons locker and then in front of Grif's. She's also getting agitated, wanting her "Dad".
---> '''Maud:''' I don't like it. I want Dad.
---> '''Simmons:''' Look, I don't even know what you are, let alone- (''Maud now standing in front of Grif's locker'') Wha?
---> '''Maud:''' I want Dad.
---> '''Simmons:''' I told you, I don't-
---> '''Maud:''' (''suddenly kicks Grif locker. It goes through several walls before vanishing into the sky. Then a satellite, with one of its stabilizing wings torn off, falls to the ground in a fiery ball of death'') [[PunctuatedForEmphasis I. Want. Dad.]]
---> '''Simmons:''' (''scared shitless'') ...that doesn't seem physically possible...
---> '''Grif''' Simmons, as loath as I am to suggest working hard, I think we should drop everything and find her Dad before we learn what else she can do that should be physically impossible...say, to ''us''?
** Right after that, Simmons makes the mistake of calling Maud "[his] little pony", causing her to [[NotSoStoic show some emotion (anger)]] and stomps the floor, creating a large crack that leads to the door... Where [[PapaWolf Church]] shows up, carrying a beaten and battered Sarge, demanding what the Reds have done to Maud.
---> '''Simmons:''' (''scared shitless, again'') She teleported! Please don't hurt me! She's right here!
---> '''Maud:''' (''calming down upon seeing Church'') Dad.
** Oh, and since Sarge was wearing his armor when Church beat the living crap out of him, Church's arm is seriously maimed when he finds Maud. The only reason he didn't notice was because his [[PapaWolf paternal instincts overtook his pain receptors for a little while.]]
---> '''Simmons:''' ...Grif?
---> '''Grif:''' Yeah, Simmons?
---> '''Simmons:''' ...did you see his hand?
---> '''Grif:''' [[{{Squick}} No, and I'm doing my best to keep it that way so I can eat later.]]
---> '''Simmons:''' But it was so-
---> '''Grif:''' Not thinking about it!
---> '''Simmons:''' How was he not in agony?
---> '''Sarge:''' Sheer...nerve... A true soldier...can work through...any pain! And no soldier...is as strong...[[PapaWolf as the angry wolf...]]
---> '''Church:''' (''echoing from across the canyon'') [[DelayedReaction OHMYGOD! Why does my hand hurt so much?]]
* Due to Maud appearing (and Church particle destroying his arm beyond all repair), Medical Officer Frank [=DuFrense=] appears earlier than he does in canon. [[MythologyGag Church almost immediately calls him Doc]], and Maud does as well.
--> '''Doc:''' [[LampshadeHanging ...she's never going to call me anything other than Doc, is she?]]
--> '''Church:''' Probably not.
** Then Maud asks Doc if she could borrow his skull. When he asks why, she says she wants to use it to beat him to death with it, starting that "Mom (Tex) can do it". Church, realizing that telling Maud how much like Tex she is might not have been the best move, he curses. But due to the shitload of painkillers he took to keep the pain from his messed up arm at bay, he could;dn't think of any good ones and settled for the first one that came to his mind.
---> '''Church:'''[[WebVideo/DragonBallZAbridged ...crapbaskets...]]
---> '''Doc:''' Oh, you say that too.
* Over at Red Base, Grif and Simmons are debating on how to help Sarge. Grif says that, with an absence of orders, they have to continue to follow the orders last given to them. Simmons is rather surprised by this.
--> '''Simmons:''' ...wow Grif. I'm rather proud of your work ethic. I honestly thought you'd say that being without orders meant you were supposed to stuff your face and take a nap.
--> '''Grif:''' Which is what I was doing when last I had orders..
--> '''Simmons:''' And pride is gone.
--> '''Sarge:''' ...Medic...
** When Simmons asks if Grif has any medical training, he replies he only knows mouth to mouth. Sarge, being [[DrillSergeantNasty Sarge]], immediately threatens Grif.
---> '''Sarge:''' Come near...my face... And I...will bite...your eyes out!
---> '''Grif:''' And I'm pretty sure he doesn't need that. Pretty sure 'talking' is a good sign they don't need mouth to mouth.
---> '''Simmons:''' Well all I know is the Heimlich Maneuver! I seriously doubt if more compression is any good for him in this state!
---> '''Grif:''' Well what do you expect me to do? Toss him a [[ShoutOut Senzu]] [[Manga/DragonBall Bean?]]
---> '''Doc:''' I've actually got a few of those! (''Grif and Simmons turn to the door, seeing Doc walk in'') Well, the equivalent thereof. Bone regeneraters, cellular accelerators, muscle boosters...nearly as good as a Senzu, if not viable in all situations. So who's the corpse, and where's my patient?
---> '''Sarge:''' [[ShoutOut I still...]] [[{{Franchise/Transformers}} function...]]
---> '''Grif:''' The 'corpse' is your patient.
** After Doc mentions he gave Church a [[ArtificialLimbs prothetic arm to replace the one he destroyed]], Sarge wants one too.
---> '''Sarge:''' That turns into a chainsaw! No, a shotgun! No...a shotgun with a chainsaw for a bayonet! (''falls to the floor in agony'') Damn my organs...
---> '''Doc:''' Actually, I'm reading a surprisingly low amount of organ damage. I should have you back on your feet in a matter of hours. So no cybernetic limb for you, sorry.
---> '''Sarge:''' I'll cut off my own arm if it'll get me one!
---> '''Doc:''' I'd just reattach it. Besides, I'm fresh out.
---> '''Sarge:''' Blasted Blues getting the best of everything. The cybernetic arm, the pony...
** After Doc finishes, Sarge suddenly has a ''revelation'' about [[MythologyGag why they're here]]: Maud.
---> '''Sarge:''' [[InsaneTrollLogic I know what we're doing here! I know what Command is planning! They knew the pony would show up...and she's a brand new Superweapon! This battle between Reds and Blues isn't about control of the canyon, it's about control of the pony! Whoever holds Maud holds the key to victory!]]

--> '''Engineer''': I'm not sure whether to ask why or how.
--> '''Soldier''': Fluttershy was crying.
--> '''Engineer''': A valid answer for both.

* The BLU Spy shows up as RED Pyro but Fluttershy can see through Spy disguises. She responds by grabbing a briefcase and beating him over the head with it while repeatedly saying [[{{Dinosaurs}} Not The Mama]]. Scout rushes to the scene and his biggest concern is switching out the briefcase with a frying pan so Fluttershy can continue what has become her new favorite game.

** Tatsurou names the daughter [[LaurenFaust Lauren]] on purpose, as he notes in the comments.

* Demoman gets a kiss from Pauling under mistletoe. As in a missle with a human toe attached.

-->'''Spy''': How high tall is the observation tower?
-->'''Engineer''': 59 feet from peak to ground.
-->'''Spy''': In that case, Fluttershy, I can fly exactly 59 feet.

* Fluttershy going through puberty. She repeats her anger from "Green Isn't Your Color" but she has an air horn for voice and a rocket launcher for her kicks this time.