HOORAY!
(is grading programming homework...)
Someone's code: double penetration;
long dick;
(replaces code with:)
#define ever (;;)
for ever
;
edited 11th Nov '10 1:46:08 PM by TsundeRay
http://twitter.com/raydere | http://raydere.tumblr.com
The day of today is the learning of the Engrish on the board! Read. Write of answers to the paper. Then handing in the your paper. I will be having the grade of they.
You cannot firmly grasp the true form of Squidward's technique!
Departed days ahead.
-Meanwhile, in a long forgotten section of the school-
Alright students, I'm your Prof, and this is Attaining Immortality through Narcolepsy... -snooze-
-DOORSLAMNOISE-
Huh, what, where, why?! Yes, right. Attaining Immortality through Narcolepsy 101. Take out your textbooks and pillows and I'll see you in 10 days or so. -Sleepybye-
I guess we could go... wherever we please.
[grumbles into the teacher's lounge] I keep saying and saying, if we don't get a field trip soon, absolutely none of my students will be able to pass their Breaking The Square-Cube Law Statewide exams. By the way, we need a new gym.
But soft! What rock through yonder window breaks? It is a brick! And Juliet is out cold.
-enters spacious room with a clarinet in hand- Hello, class! I'm Mr. Everest, and I'm your Band Instructor from here on out.
For our first piece, we'll be playing this.
"But Mr. Everest, this is way too hard! Most of us are freshmen, and this is only the Concert Band."
-whacks the whiny little bitch in the face with clarinet-
Shut the fuck up. This song will change your life.
"-sobsobcry- WAAH! How am I supposed to play trumpet now? :'("
edited 11th Nov '10 3:01:40 PM by Everest
HOORAY!
(Game genre appreciation class...)
So class, who can tell me what is widely regarded as the first shmup?
"Tou—"
...you are expelled from this school.
edited 11th Nov '10 3:02:08 PM by TsundeRay
http://twitter.com/raydere | http://raydere.tumblr.comJessica, who's supposed to be in my class, speaks up: Space Invaders, duh.
Who ate my fruit salad? Somebody's been in my fruit salad. Gah, I can't go back to my class on an empty stomach!
ARGH! I just removed that line!
edited 11th Nov '10 3:03:33 PM by BlackWolfe
But soft! What rock through yonder window breaks? It is a brick! And Juliet is out cold.
HOORAY!
That is correct, but you lose points in your class.
Anyways, we're gonna talk about puzzle games.
"Taaa, na-na-na—"
...OTHER THAN TETRIS.
http://twitter.com/raydere | http://raydere.tumblr.com
-class attempts to play Sequoia Throne; fails miserably-
.*sigh* -walks up to a random flute player; plays high G directly into their ear- Learn the part before I break out the whips.
This goes for all of you!
edited 11th Nov '10 3:07:09 PM by Everest
[slams the fridge door shut] Ugh. FINE. [heads back to the remains of the gym]
HEY! GAMERA! MOTHRA! YOU STOP FIGHTING RIGHT NOW OR IT'S DETENTION!
But soft! What rock through yonder window breaks? It is a brick! And Juliet is out cold.
My hair is whippable.
No Billy, I would not lose in a fight with SCP-056. In fact I woul-
Wait, how do you know about the Foundation?
Come into my office and we can talk (I think I still have some class-A amnesiacs in here. And I would SO beat SCP-056 in anything. And Able in a fight for that matter. As well as 682. Damn I'm great.)
edited 11th Nov '10 3:34:40 PM by HairWhippedByHair
No, I absolutely never forget my password. And I never have a suspiciously specific denial.
No! I will not take "AWESOMELY RAD" as your term assignment! The grammar isn't even right! Go study your 90s video game manuals and come back with a good one!
-goes to principal's office-
What's that? I've been moved to Extreme Omnivorism? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
edited 11th Nov '10 3:50:14 PM by vaguelyyaoilookingcatboy
Warning: Posts may cause derp.
Billy, why are you the good grammar? To assignment is the Engrish! YOU'VE FAIL!
You cannot firmly grasp the true form of Squidward's technique!
Your army sucks.
*Walks in*
Hello class, I'm Mr. Crimson and welcome to Re-
*Sees a room full of angry Delinquents, including one eating a pencil, a Freddie Mercury look-alike, and at least two Gorillas.*
How the hell did I get suckered into teaching Remedial English?
edited 11th Nov '10 4:11:21 PM by Neo_Crimson
Sorry, I can't hear you from my FLYING METAL BOX!Okay, that's it. Rampaging giants to the left, gentle giants to the right. No, Jessica, you do not have to grow. MY LEFT, GODZILLA! THE OTHER WAY!
SKREEEAAAW!
The hell you are! You go over and stand next to Clovy and think about what you've done!
edited 11th Nov '10 4:12:42 PM by BlackWolfe
But soft! What rock through yonder window breaks? It is a brick! And Juliet is out cold.
Blackhole for a heart
[There is a classroom in which everything is colored black, and some light barely manages to shine through the windows. A man dressed completely in black drapes and robes walks in and slouches in his chair.]
"Welcome class, to Nihilism 101, where each and every one of you can be a Nietzsche Wannabe....Not that it matters...You don't even have to listen to me.....So many muscle fluctuations and cells trading knowledge with each other, just so your ears can...hear....a jumble of sounds that have no meaning other than what your pitiful mass of muscle, or brain, "thinks" of....You are all so dedicated to these grades, these scribbles and assortments of lines, these expectations and codes which aren't even tangible....Why am I even talking? Why are you even here? We're all gonna die anyway. Just....Just go curl up and wait...It won't take very long, you're not even a speck of dust in the universe's massive beach of time...."
[Goes to corner and curls up into fetal position.]
"....No, Billy...*sigh*....You do not break into a display of joy...heh, what a meaningless thing...and song, another result of your body doing work that doesn't matter...."
edited 11th Nov '10 4:27:43 PM by Sevroy
According to the Tearjerker page and several of its editors, I am a Complete Monster with no soul.
Alright, class, time to check your homework.
Sally?
Oh... you ate it. Good job. What's that? My head is a cookie? N-no... You remember, this is what got Mr. Anoma switched. You liked him, right? Yes... That's good.
Warning: Posts may cause derp.
"Excuse me I'm your replacement. I'd run if I were you because some of these kids look hungry."
No, Billy, you're supposed to play an F at measure 21, not a B, goddamn you! Oh, wait, you don't have your left hand anymore, do you?
-snerk- Get outta my class, you little fuckface!
edited 11th Nov '10 4:46:40 PM by Everest
-Sighs- ...Hello Lolicon 101... Today's lesson is on Card Captor Sakura 34... turn your textbook to page 253... -Sighs-
Warning: Posts may cause derp.
My hair is whippable.
You know Billy, I could do something past the Moral Event Horizon to you and everyone in universe will still love me.
Wait, where are you going? Changing?
[5 minutes later]
Oh come on, just because you're goff now doesn't mean you have the power of plot on your side.
...
edited 11th Nov '10 4:54:18 PM by HairWhippedByHair
No, I absolutely never forget my password. And I never have a suspiciously specific denial.
Somebody is having the tell to me why Engrish is the occurence. Yes you?
No, resulting Engrish is not the result of a the Cthulhu result. Negative the two pointings.
You cannot firmly grasp the true form of Squidward's technique!
Now class, I'll teach you about extreme omnivorism. Sally, step up so I can demonstrate...
[SCENE CHANGE]
I was hungry and those kids looked delicious!
^ Billy stands up and announces, "A real video game genre appreciator still swears by DOOM!"
Now, class, I want you to think for a second...
What can you do with an Abe Lincoln hat, a box of baking soda, and a DVD copy of a Uwe Boll movie?
[One student raises his hand.]
I don't want you to actually answer that, George. It's a rhetorical question.