Corrupt-a-wish.

The serial killer seems weirded out by the fact that you want to die. He tells you there is so much for you to live for, giving you a Rousing Speech that makes you feel motivated. You are ready to change your live, make great achievements, and change the world.

Then he kills you.

I wish Yandere-Chan would leave Senpai alone.

The former leaves the latter alone after killing him.

I wish that the next user is turned into a fish.

granted, i still have a wish though, so…

i wish I wasn't a fish

i really don't mind.

edited 24th Jun '16 8:33:24 PM by Alucart23

Granted. You're a jellyfish.

...What? It's technically not a fish.

I wish my D&D group wasn't splitting up.

Granted, they reform, but now are playing FATAL.

I wish autocorrect was less retarded.

Granted. It now corrects all your words to the misspelled ones.

I wish that Battlebots would show all of their fights their entirety.

edited 24th Jun '16 10:48:31 PM by Savaget1337

Granted, but in doing so they reveal the horrifying truth: that the robots are sentient and you're basically watching snuff films of living beings tearing one another to shreds.

I wish my car had better gas mileage.

Granted, it can go one extra metre for every gallon.

I wish for a better economy.

Granted. The economy is "better", but economic inequality has only gotten worse.

I wish I had a bowl of Crunch Berries right about now.

Granted, it's Way Past the Expiration Date

I wish Destiel became canon.

Granted, the entire fanbase declares Ruined Forever.

I wish I was an amazing gamer.

Granted, you are now an amazingly bad gamer. One who makes Leeroy Jenkins look like a calm cool coldly calculating gamer.

I wish for a glass of iced tea.

Done, It tastes like piss.

I wish to be the Conqueror of Zee World.

Granted, but shortly after your world is conquered by the X world.

I wish I understood all your references.

Granted, everyone thinks you're a nerd for getting the references.

I wish I was a Space Marine!

Granted, you awaken on a distant planet clad in space marine armor... oh and you're currently stuck on a wall covered in resin with a xenomorph about to burst from your chest.

I wish for a day where everyone cared and nobody cried, where everyone loved and nobody lied. Where everyone shared and swallowed their pride. Feel free to kill me.

Granted. Unfortunately World War III starts the very next day.

I wish I had something good for lunch today.

Yes. But you can't eat lunch for the rest of your life.

I wish that they would cancel Teen Titans Go!.

It gets replaced with Young Justice Go!

I wish for spicy ground chicken.

Granted, but the hot sauce burns your tongue off, and now you cannot taste anything.

I wish for Sonichu to be bearable.

Granted. Your favourite webcomic ends up becoming even worse.

I wish the DC Extended Universe thread wasn't so toxic.

Granted. The thread is so clean that you die from too much harsh fumes.

I wish I can corrupt a wish.

I corrupted it for you.

I wish Michael Bay stopped making Transformers movies.

He now writes for the Marvel Cinematic Universe.

I wish that they'd cancel The Powerpuff Girls (2016).

Granted. They also cancel Steven Universe.

I wish Call of Duty wasn't popular.