The Evil Dead films are canonishIt seems rather obvious, with the cabin's extreme similarity, and any differences could come with fixing it over time. Going with working with what they have, obviously, Ash is The Virgin.
Dana is now a werewolf.She got torn up pretty bad by the werewolf before it gets shot, but she survived. It probably won't matter now that the Ancient Ones are back, but you never know...
The movie takes place in the same universe as Dollhouse.The Ancient Ones don't destroy the world (directly) but instead share the technology to make dolls. Since Marty was there when it happened he becomes the world's foremost expert in said technology, i.e. Topher.
The organization running the titular cabin is the SCP Foundation.Think about it. A huge, multinational organization with technology and resources up the wazoo, ready to do everything and anything it takes to protect the world, and having in their ownership a huge selection of apparently paranormal subjects. Rings any bells?
Dana probably survived the end of the world and joined the Ancient Ones.I mean, come on, she survived getting the shit thrashed out of her by a huge zombie and she got through a werewolf attack.
Marty is the virgin, not Dana.That is why the Zombie Redneck Torture Family couldn't kill him while the rest of the gang were still alive.
Humanity is now strong enough to take on the Ancient Ones.The worldwide sacrifice and destruction failures through wit and technology is foreshadowing that humanity might be clever enough to defeat/contain them or at least survive their onslaught without a lot of help from benevolent supernatural forces.
The Ancient Ones have surfaced before and always been beaten back.The film is a metaphor for the unchanging nature of the horror genre... and yet, if one just looks back, one realizes that horror has changed IMMENSELY! The organization represents studio executives, and like studio executives, they're blind to the reality that the Ancient Ones(audience) are not immutable.
The controllers' plan would have gone off without a hitch if Marty and Holden's roles had been switched.Holden could have been squeezed into the Fool role somehow, and given Marty's philosophical predilections, he could have fit into the Scholar role with no trouble. But by making Holden the Scholar, Marty got the Fool by default, and the chemicals in his dope negated the controllers' mind-control. And so the controllers sowed the seed of their own destruction.
The controller's plan actually worked.When the controllers died, they became sacrifices themselves. Wendy Lin was the Virgin, and Ronald the Intern was the Fool. The hand was coming out to give a standing ovation for a job well done before sinking back into slumber for another year. I thought of this after reading the Creepy Gas Station Attendant section on the main page.
Japanese schoolgirls will save the world.They're going to defeat the Ancient Ones just like they defeated that Stringy-Haired Ghost Girl.
The movie is a prequel to The Hunger Games.After the Ancient Ones sate their bloodlust, the ritual gets even more complicated, requiring twenty-three sacrifices.
The movie is a prequel to Firefly.This is the real reason we left Earth-That-Was...
Pacific Rim is an unofficial sequel to Cabin in the Woods.The as yet unreleased Guillermo Del Toro monster movie takes place sometime after the events of Cabin in the Woods. The film is reportedly about giant Lovecraftian monsters and kaiju emerging from the Pacific ocean to wreak havoc on humanity. They are the ancient ones from Cabin in the Woods. Del Toro's film will be about how mankind defends itself after the "ancient evil gods" have risen from their eternal slumber.
The facility had just finished a major renovation project.Everything's all clean and shiny, despite this evil having been around for a while. The elevators are brand-new and modern. Not a hint of dust.
The Chem department screw up in '98 is a reference to the film The FacultyThe Faculty's main cast of kids consists of the five sacrifices that the Ancient Ones require (Casey; the Virgin, Stokely; The Scholar, Zeke: the Fool, Delilah: the Whore, Stan: the Athlete), who all don't entirely fit their stereotypes once you scratch the surface much like our heroes in Cabin in the Woods. The film was released in 1998 and the main weapon against our evil beastie; A chemical compound. The Chem department did seem to screw up on that one...
Only a few of the monsters are available to be summoned each year.The "betting board" doesn't include all the monsters seen in the last act- but it does contain at least one (Kevin) whom nobody bets on. This suggests that only a select number of monsters are available to be summoned. Possibly they're chosen based on the predilections of the sacrifices, or possibly because of what seems to have made the Ancient Ones pleased recently (maybe the Controllers do some audience research each year).
The Ancient Gods planned on this happening.The ritual being screwed up is no fault of the controllers nor the teens. It was the monsters who screwed up killing The Fool. The Gods have tired of this supplication crap they put up with every year and felt it was time for a change, and the only way to get out of this contract was for everyone to screw it up.
Why was each character forced into their position of sacrifice?
Mordecai isn't humanAfter re-watching the movie, a few things stuck out about Mordecai. First, his walk isn't perfect. He's almost limping. In the slaughter picture in the house, there is a well dressed man with a cane in the background. Second, not only does he threaten the sacrifices, he tells the controllers to do their job right. Maybe Mordecai being the Harbinger isn't a term from the controllers. He's the Harbinger of the Ancient Ones's will. Possibly a lesser ancient god sent as an intermediary.
The Facility is run by Wolfram and HartBecause they have infinite resources at their disposal, no moral compunctions about sacrificing humans, and don't want the Old Ones to ruin their perfectly good global domination they have going on. They even recruited Winifred Burkle's twin sister for the job, erasing all memory of her from her family.
The Ancient Ones are Children/ImmatureThey're not satisfied by the slaughter at the facility only "The Ritual". Not because of any mystical properties....they want a Bedtime story or else they won't go to sleep.
Marty and Jules were seeing each other behind Curt's back.
The easiest way to defeat the awakened Ancient Ones before they destroy the world...Have a classroom full of Japanese nine-year-olds sing them into happy little frogs with the power of friendship.
Cabin In The Woods takes place in the same universe that Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Angel does, but...... it's a parallel universe(ala the "Wishverse") where The Old Ones such as Illyria were never driven from the Earth and remained in power until the present day.
Had the ritual not failed and life on Earth went on...Eventually, the ritual would have adapted to a new form of horror stories: something similar to Slender-vlogs. Boy, the Organization would have had a hell of a time keeping Slender Man in one place...
The ancient ones are Kajiu.This movie is a prequel to ALL Godzilla/monster films from the original to the one coming in 2014. Only Godzilla and Gamara are not ancient ones, they work for someone else...
It's not coincidence that all the rituals failed at the same time...After years of being spoon-fed their sacrifices, the ancient ones just got bored. So they decided to end the world. Being the assholes they were, they couldn't just let it happen. They decided to create scenarios where all the rituals failed at the same time, to create suffering amongst the controllers who desperately try to regain control of the situation. It's the only explanation for everything going wrong the way it did all at once. These guys wanted the controllers to fail.
The Ancient Ones are classic slasher villains.They wer'nt Eldritch Abombinations, but the film Leans to the Fourth Wall enough that classic villains could be seen as gods. When said Gods where unleashed, it was a Five-Bad Band featuring Pinhead as the Big Bad, Freddy Krueger as The Dragon, either Jason or Michael as The Heavy and Leatherface as The Brute. And the "End of the World" was simply the return of the classic killers.
The ritual was a partial success.This theory hinges on the big red button that released all the monster, and why it was there. Basically, the classic horror movie ending was the ideal, but any acceptable ending to the story, that wasn't completely happy (we know from the other failures that happy endings don't work), would at least prevent the gods from actually rising (a "partial success" as I'm going to call it). While most of the people working in the facility didn't know it, that button was a contingency plan, in case the sacrifices found the facility. The most unsatisfying ending imaginable would have been for the SWAT team to just shoot them both dead, or even just shoot Marty. But once the monsters were out, any possible outcome would have been at least somewhat satisfying: 1) Everyone Dies, 2) Just the facility people die and they survive, 3) One of them makes it out, but the facility people die, 4) they all join forces and manage to fight off the monsters, etc. As it is, the world won't be destroyed, but because the ending wasn't perfect there'll probably be some pretty bad hurricanes and earthquakes.
The Director was wrong: killing Marty in the way she suggested wouldn't have completed the ritual.Because the ritual depends on the victims being killed by what they summoned and/or by accident, having Marty shot by the guards or Dana probably wouldn't have made much difference. It might have worked if Marty had been killed by Patience Bucker, or one of the other monsters that he and Dana released into the facility; there might have even been acceptable methods found in Patience's diary, eg: temporarily putting the zombies to rest by having the Final Girl become a convert to the Buckner's Religion of Evil and torturing Marty to death. But because the controllers were in such a rush to fix the ritual after their previous blunder, they failed to take all the variables into account. Still blaming this on the chem department...
Kevin is actually shown.He's the guy with a plastic bag over his head suffocating the other guy. Take off that bag and he looks like a regular guy - we just see him when he's being ugly.
Something else kills the Ancient Ones.My money's on Kamina, alternatively the Ancient Ones are the Anti-Spiral.
The Ancient Ones are Hate DumbBeing implicitly horror fans, when the "movie" doesn't turn out exactly the way they want it to they just write it off as bad. The earth's destruction by a giant fiery hand at the end? Internet flamewars that they start because of their Hate Dumb.
The Ancient Ones represent the corporate producers funding the staff, which is televising these stories for Hell.Why else would The Ancient Ones care about overseas markets at all? Because they have their own branches in their respective countries - it also helps that they are possibly funding these Controllers by giving them the monsters. They could possibly be giving each Controller station their own criteria, as well - archetypes for every genre they're supposed to direct, and probably the sales pitch as well. Analyzing the main plot, it's also safe to say they also recycle scenery by giving the horror villains ambiguous backgrounds, so as long as the plot is internally consistent, the ritual keeps going. But if the ritual is a complete disaster (ie. it flops), The Ancient Ones go bankrupt from going over their budget, and those who they were entertaining (thus why The Ancient Ones don't bat an eye at gratuitous sexual content) riot at the company doors...Earth itself. Cue Hell on Earth.
This entire film is a prequel to the The Salvation War seriesObviously not canon, but consider it: this 'containment' of the Ancient Ones has been going on for a long, long time, always under the assumption that the world would end if the Ancient Ones were unleashed on the Earth. But a central tenant of The Salvation War is that humankind would have been wiped off the face of the Earth...but because of how immortals are affected by the passage of time (read: centuries feel like minutes given enough time), they're in absolute horror at how far humanity has advanced over the course of the brief period of two millennia. Imagine holding an unarmed man at gunpoint, take your eyes off him for a second, and turn back to see that he's turned into a Cyderdemon. Humanity is living in fear of the Ancient Ones because of what they could have done, and because of secret their organization was. But unleash them on a twenty-first humanity that's actually united against a common enemy? Nuclear weapons are the least of their problems.
The Button is punishment if a country massively fucks upIn the event of a sacrifice going massively tits up somehow, the other nations can vote to force a nation to purge their bunker, so they are absolutely determined to succeed in their job.
One year Hadley couldn't work - he was sick, death in the family, whatever. The Merman was called that year.Stitterson says "Dude, be thankful. Those things are terrifying. And the cleanup on them's a nightmare." This is how Stitterson knows how bad the cleanup is but Hadley still hasn't seen one.
The ritual failed because Marty killed that zombie with a trowel......And zombie blood was used instead of human blood. Hence, the tremor when it was pumped into the ritual symbol. The Old Ones were pissed, and there was no way to recover from that.
The Cabin in the Woods takes place in The Laundry Series universe.And the ending is CASE NIGHTMARE GREEN.
The Director was accepted as a sacrifice.She just followed orders to kill people happily and etc. She's the Fool. Marty, who saved Dana even though she moved to kill him, was chosen for the innocent Virgin, to live or die. After all, the movie was actually a success. Humans are still interesting, so the Ancient Gods spare it... this time.
The plan failed because "upstairs" wanted it to fail, and the Ancient Ones are classic exploitation horror movies of the '50s, '60s and '70sThe movie isn't just a send-up of slasher movies of the late '70s to early '80s. (Its references to those movies are quite affectionate.) It's a parody of specifically torture porn movies of the late '90s to the present. There are three key elements which distinguish between "torture porn" and older horror movies:
The unicorn is a reference to bronies and their often ridiculous penchant for over-the-top grimmification of the source material in fan-created media.
This is the prequel to "Shingeki no Kyojin".Pretty obvious, isn't it. Titans appear all over the world and human civilization goes down.