Gleb tries to hit on Varya, to no avail. When his second attempt also fails, Gleb uses Lyuba to start a rumour about his and Varya's sexual "adventures". Varya retaliates by starting a rumour that he has 3 centimetres-long penis. Meanwhile, Lobanov's patient turns out to be a gambler, and tricks Lobanov into playing with him; of course, Lobanov loses his last money. Now the patient must be discharged from the hospital, so Lobanov decides to hold him up for a little longer by assigning him additional analyses, until he finds more money and wins back what he already lost; when Lyuba refuses to lend him money, he asks Gleb. Romanenko, who's still trying to disprove Varya's rumour, agrees to lend him money if Lobanov, trough Lyuba, would start a new rumour about Romanenko's "big gun", but Lobanow botches this, and now everyone things that they are gays. Varya thinks that she had won... but then Lyuba guesses that it was Varya's fault that Gleb "became gay", and Varya is forced to make out with Gleb in front of Lyuba to prevent another rumour.
Levin must deal with a patient who refuses to accept any medicine... besides urine therapy
. Levin asks Bykov for help, who then finds out that "urine" was actually the apple juice; the patient just wants to get rid of Levin. Bykov drinks his juice, but Levin, who can't hear them, thinks that it was a real urine. Bykov tells him that Levin just lacks "spirit", and that's why the patients do not obey him. Levin attempts to win Bykov's respect, and drinks a cup of urine right before him. Bykov congratulates him on this "achievement", but quickly bursts into laughter when Levin leaves.
This episode provide examples of:
- Accidental Hero: Turns out that Lobanov was correct to hold up his patient even after he was supposed to be discharged, since his patient's analyses are not very good, indicating yet-unaddressed health problems.
- Bigger Is Better in Bed: Thanks to Varya, now everyone thinks that Gleb has three centimetres-long penis, and laughs at him. Gleb hires Lobanov to start a counter-rumour, about him having a "big gun", but it backfires thanks to Lobanov's stupidity.
- Casanova Wannabe:
- Gleb tries to hit on Varya. She makes it clear right from the start that he has no chance, since it's blatantly obvious that he's only interested in sex. He replies that he is certain that they would have sex, and soon.
- When the rumour about Gleb being gay evolves into Varya being the reason why, Gleb suggests to "prove" that he's not gay, right here and now. Varya tells him that if he tries, she would prove that her knees can hit hard. This makes him suggest an actual plan.
- Enemy Mine: In the end, Gleb and Varya are forced to work together and make out in front of Lyuba to stop a rumour about Romanenko being gay.
- The Gambler: Lobanov's patient is a card gambler. He tricks Lobanov into playing with him, and, of course, Lobanov loses lots of money. Lobanov tries to borrow some money and win back what he already lost, but unfortunately, the time has come for his patient to be discharged. Lobanov later tries to rematch, but loses again. And then again, after loaning some money.
- Failure Is the Only Option: Lobanov just keeps and keeps losing money in card game with his patient, forcing him to loan more and more from everyone whom he can convince or deceive.
- False Reassurance: Bykov asks Lobanov whether he prescribed anything to his patient, and when told that not yet, says that it's "too late". Semyon is shocked, thinking that the patient somehow died in few minutes he was away from him, but Bykov reassures him that patient is about to be discharged as apparently he's healthy. However, Semyon isn't much happier, as without patient, he wouldn't get his money back.
- Gossip Evolution:
- When Gleb tells Lyuba how he bedded Varya, Lyuba starts a rumour about this, which quickly starts mutating with new details being added, ultimately making everyone believe that Varya is a pervert.
- Varya, angry at Gleb humiliating her with a rumour that he slept with her, starts a rumour that Gleb has three centimetres-long penis. Gleb hires Lobanov to start a counter-rumour, but Semyon botches it, resulting in a new rumour that the two are gay. Varya triumphs... until Lyuba decides that the reason for the two going gay is Varya being just that bad in bed.
- Gossipy Hens: This episode establishes Lyuba and her subordinates to be the resident main gossipers. Specifically, both Gleb and Varya uses Lyuba to start the malicious rumours about each other.
- Hero-Worshipper: After Bykov drinks a cup of "urine" (really just apple juice), Levin thinks that Bykov is the "true medicine hero". Now he wants to prove that he also has a "spirit of the true doctor", like Bykov. How? By drinking a cup of urine himself. Bykov actually tries to stop him, but fails, and then decides to play along, even congratulates Levin for his "achievement", but burst into laugh when Levin leaves.
- Hidden Depths: At the start of the episode, we learn that Bykov is also a good waltz dancer, when he dances with his patient.
- Hoist by His Own Petard: Gleb, to humiliate Varya, starts a rumour that he'd slept with her already; Varya, annoyed by how it mutated and made her look like a pervert, lied to Lyuba that Gleb has three centimetres-long penis, which made everyone switching to mocking Gleb instead. But then Gleb sends Lobanov to "subtly" hint Lyuba that Gleb has a "big bun"... which, due to Lobanov's poor choice of words, makes Lyuba believe that the two are gays, making Gleb's situation even worse than before. Varya gloats at first, but then she learns that Lyuba believed her to be the reason why Gleb gave up on women.
- Immediate Self-Contradiction: Semyon comes to Gleb and asks for help. When asked whether it's another attempt to loan money, he says that nope, he just wants to borrow a cigarette. He lights it up, and immediately asks to loan him 1K roubles.
- Lousy Lovers Are Losers: Gleb started a rumour about sleeping with Varya, to which she retaliated by counter-rumour about him having small penis. Gleb's attempt to send Lobanov to fix it only makes everyone believe that Gleb is gay. Varya celebrates victory, but triumph is short-living: Lyuba adds two and two, and comes to conclusion that Varya is the reason why Gleb became gay: she was so bad in bed, she killed his interest to women. Neither of them likes such a rumour, so they're forced to work together to disprove it.
- Macho Masochism: Levin gets rejected by a patient who only trusts urine therapy. When Bykov talks to him, turns out that it's apple juice, and patient just dislikes Levin. Bykov drinks the juice, and, when asked by Levin, tells him that Levin lacks the spirit to become true doctor. Levin, thinking that he's referring to drinking urine, later does exactly that in front of Bykov. Bykov congratulates him on "having a spirit", but bursts into laughing as soon as Levin leaves.
- Malicious Slander: Gleb starts a rumour about his and Varya's sex life, as retaliation for her rejecting his advances. She responds with a rumour about him having three centimetres-long penis. It backfires after Lobanov tries to "help", since now everyone thinks that Gleb and Semyon are gays... and Varya is the reason why.
- Mistaken for Gay: "Thanks" to Lobanov's "help", now everyone thinks that Semyon and Gleb are gays.
- Not Good with Rejection: Instead of just leaving Varya alone after she rejected him, Gleb starts a rumour about his and Varya's sexual life, which quickly mutates and makes everyone think that Varya is a pervert.
- Not What It Looks Like: Levin can't hear what Bykov and patient are talking about, and thus never learns that Bykov drank mere juice, not urine.
- Panacea: Levin's patient considers urine to be the cure from any illness, and refuses to accept any actual medicine. Except it is not urine; it's the apple juice. He just wanted to get rid of Levin.
- Ship Tease: When Varya kisses Gleb to stop the rumour about him being gay, Gleb sees the kiss as genuine and thinks that it's a sign that he still has a chance with her.
- Sore Loser: Semyon reacts to losing in card game extremely angrily and loudly.
- Teeny Weenie: Invoked; thanks to Varya, now everyone thinks that Gleb has three centimetres-long penis, and laughs at him, from personnel to patients, including a midget, who for some reason has the strongest reaction out of them all. It's her retaliation for starting a rumour that he slept with her.
- That Came Out Wrong:
- Gleb tries to tell Varya who's walking away that he's sure that they would have sex, and soon. Right at that moment, an old woman comes out of restroom, and obviously thinks that he's talking to her, giving him weird look.
- Lobanov tries to help Romanenko with disproving the rumour about Gleb's "short size". He succeeds, but now everyone thinks that they are gays, due to Semyon's choice of words, which Gleb finds way bigger problem.Lobanov: Wow, a marker. A big one. Just like Romanenko's [penis]. No, Romanenko's [penis] is bigger. One and a half times bigger. A massive one, you hear? Whenever I remember it, it drives me nuts.
- Too Dumb to Live: Bykov tells Levin's urine-loving patient that he's not gonna live for long if he continues refusing his treatment; though it turns out that it was not urine, but the apple juice, he just lied to Levin to get rid of him.Bykov: In your age, refusing the treatment is like bathing with a crocodile: fun is gonna be short-living.
