Cuz when it feels like a kick in the teeth, I can take it
Throw your stones and you won't see me break it
Say what you want
Take your shots
You're setting me free with one more kick in the teeth!
— "Kick in the Teeth" by Papa Roach
"Unlike my colleagues, I seem to have a tendency to stay alive. Since this morning I've been bitten, shot, bombed, electrocuted, almost drowned, almost fallen to my death, and strangled. Rasputin wasn't so lucky! But here I am, exposing myself to radiation. Why not?! Let's add to the list! Maybe I can get burned, stabbed, and poisoned before the day is done."
But it turns out I am not such a one as stays dead forever, especially when I only fell eighty floors to the pavement. I am made of sterner stuff than that.
— Oar, Ascending
It'll take more than being tied to a lit keg of explosives and tossed into a pit of acid filled with mutant, acid-resistant flying piranhas equipped with flamethrowers and battle axes while venomous, mechanical, missile-launching Morris dancers armed with liquid hydrogen harpoon guns are overhead; riding giant rabid killer bees with side-mounted death rays to kill Othar Trygvassen!
Don't get up. You have been shot. Sadly, it was not fatal. I have removed the bullet... and three others, a blowgun dart, two shark's teeth, a tip of a bayonet, a twisted paperclip, and a meager handful of buckshot. You may want to learn how to duck.
Look, one time when we were little, we went iceskating together, and she fell into the lake. She was down there for three hours, and when they finally pulled her out, not only was she still alive, she was pregnant.
— Grif describing his sister, Red vs. Blue
Itís been my privilege to fight side by side with Captain Cortez since the Battle of Steel Cross back in 853. In that time, Iíve seen him surpass virtually everything the Apothecariate taught me about the augmented physiology of the Adeptus Astartes. To my knowledge, only two of the small bones in his right foot are sill intact. The rest of his skeleton has been shattered at one time or another, and most of his body is covered with a thick layer of scar tissue. Iíve seen him lead a charge into a breach with a broken back, fight for six weeks without food or water, and rouse his men for one last desperate push with four-fifths of his lifeblood pooled around his feet. Thereís something else there, something keeping him alive when logic dictates that he should have died long ago. I can only conclude the Emperor has him marked for a grand fate indeed.
It's a good thing I'm Seto Kaiba, or that might have actually hurt me.
— A completely unscathed Seto Kaiba after a motorcycle crash, Yu-Gi-Oh! The Abridged Series
I told you, my body's built differently than yours!
— InuYasha on multiple occasions, as an explanation for his totally improbable survival
— Zoro, in responce to Sanji asking about all the blood on him and around him. See page image.
"But they made a serious mistake: They tried to beat it out of Archer! Captaining his ship? Welll, better than T'Pol, sure. Exploring new worlds? Eyeehh. But when it comes to taking a beating, my god, nobody does it better! That face has seen more punishment than a Los Angeles S&M dungeon!"
— SFDebris, "Azati Prime"
David: When Batman jacks Sensei in the face really hard, we learn that Sensei has the ability to not bleed. Like, to retain blood that should otherwise be bled in the case of an injury.
Laura: THERE SHOULD HAVE BEEN BLOOD - THE MUCH LESS INTERESTING MOVIE BY P.T. ANDERSON
"Fire is one of those special effects that's hard to fake. If a blacksmith is hammering hot metal in a movie, it's usually exactly that. If someone is burning alive, it's probably a cranky stuntman covered in gel and not CGI. But there is no reason to believe that a group of industrious 1994 filmmakers couldn't come up with a way to make pretend hot coals... This stunt instantly transforms a riveting action sequence into a room-wide conversation about what's wrong with Jackie Chan's fear glands. I should also mention that when he gets out, he is kicked in the chest before he stops smoldering. I appreciate that he does these crazy things, but this scene may have looked better if Jackie wasn't suddenly and unexplainedly wearing oven mitts. Or if Ken Lo wasn't awkwardly throwing kicks several feet above Jackie's head while waiting for the immolated action star to regain lucidity. As a viewer, it would have been less jarring if he had turned to the camera and said, 'Hi, I'm future skin graft recipient Jackie Chan. We'll get back to the movie, but first — here's how you trick lava into sex!'."
Thus, Nicholai abruptly departs. Along the way he falls into a sink hole, lands in a sewer passage full of poisonous gas. This gas also happens to be flammable and the place goes up like a match when Nikkie stumbles over a stick of TNT left by bank robbers who's heist ran afoul due to the viral outbreak. He is then blasted clear across the park and lands in a ravine filled with bees. Zombie bees. He will emerge without a scratch in the final act.
"Aha, I am invincible! Unfortunately, my helicopter seems not to be..." *sent blasting off again*