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Anime and Manga
Kakashi: I know you want to protect [Naruto] from the Akatsuki, but still, to entrust him with a jutsu like that [the rasengan]. After all, he could've killed Sasuke.
Jiraiya: Aren't you a fine one to talk? Teaching the chidori to someone like Sasuke.
Jiraiya: Aren't you a fine one to talk? Teaching the chidori to someone like Sasuke.
"I deal with liars every day, and they're worthless trash, the whole lot of 'em. They're nothing but parasites eating away at our nation! Me? Well, yes, I lie about who I am, but that's for Yor's sake! Anything would be righteous if it's for Yor!"
— Yuri Briarnote , Spy X Family
Comic Books
"Again, you expect us to blindly follow you but you refuse to trust us!"
"I want to know who's behind this. Too weird for the Triads or the Russian mob. Smells more to me like vigilantes. Last thing this city needs. Some psychotic playing Judge, Jury, and Executioner."
—The Punisher, Vertical Challenge
Bilgy: Hey! Stop that fighting! You should be able to live in peace with your own kind!
Strep: (thinking) You HUMANS should talk about living in peace with your own kind!
Strep: (thinking) You HUMANS should talk about living in peace with your own kind!
Fan Fiction
Lincoln: [After seeing Stella unconscious) Who did this with this innocent girl?
Lori: I did this Twerp, she insulted Lola so I returned the favor to her, nobody insult my sisters.
Lucy: Nobody except yourself, your phone-tard.
Lori: I did this Twerp, she insulted Lola so I returned the favor to her, nobody insult my sisters.
Lucy: Nobody except yourself, your phone-tard.
Lt. Rebecca Obsidian: Ever since I was a kid, I was bullied relentlessly for my white eyes. I had no friends, my parents didn't care for me, and every day, I was mocked, pushed around and insulted. One day, I had ENOUGH. I decided I had enough of octo valley, and I secretly left.
Ruby Diorite: But you punish people for deserting, yet you did it yourself? That's just completely hypocritical!
Ruby Diorite: But you punish people for deserting, yet you did it yourself? That's just completely hypocritical!
"You got some nerve playing the victim card. After all the graves you’ve filled and minds you’ve crippled, you still think you’re a hero just because your ex would slap you around."
— Aaron Cash, The Redemption of Harley Quinn
Film - Animated
Mayor Lionheart: Smellweather!
Dawn Bellwether: [to Nick and Judy] Agh. That's a fun little name he likes to use. I called him Lion-fart once. He did not care for that, let me tell you. It was not a good day for me.
Dawn Bellwether: [to Nick and Judy] Agh. That's a fun little name he likes to use. I called him Lion-fart once. He did not care for that, let me tell you. It was not a good day for me.
— Zootopia
Film - Live-Action
Sarge: Cooper, get out of here! Jesus, I'm pinned, mate!
Cooper: "No heroics", you bloody hypocrite!
Cooper: "No heroics", you bloody hypocrite!
"Oh so you can't go to Vegas, but she can fuck a bellhop on a Carnival cruise line?"
— Phil Wenneck, The Hangover
Kurt's Dad: My son's a homosexual, and I love him. I love my dead gay son.
J.D.: Wonder how he'd react if his son had a limp wrist with a pulse?
J.D.: Wonder how he'd react if his son had a limp wrist with a pulse?
— Heathers
"I figure after we got through slaughtering all those Indians, we thought we ought to do somethin'... generous. So we gave freedom to the black man. Now we feel good, we can go back to... finish off the Indians."
— William Shannon on The American Civil War, Keoma
Gretchen Wieners: Regina, you're wearing sweatpants. It's Monday.
Regina George: So...?
Karen Smith: So that's against the rules, and you can't sit with us.
Regina: Whatever. Those rules aren't real.
Karen: They were real that day I wore a vest!
Regina: Because that vest was disgusting!
Regina George: So...?
Karen Smith: So that's against the rules, and you can't sit with us.
Regina: Whatever. Those rules aren't real.
Karen: They were real that day I wore a vest!
Regina: Because that vest was disgusting!
Ha! I was a good mother. You know what makes me sick? I am sick to death of people saying that it's all the parents' fault and that it all starts with the family. Wanna blame someone? Why don't you blame YOUR MOTHER? She was the one who stole my husband and broke up my family. And then you took my son!
— Nancy Loomis to Sydney Prescott, Scream 2
"THAT'S CHEATING!"
— Al-G Rhythm, Space Jam: A New Legacy
"The new military commander. He fights drugs and uses drugs."
— VJ Emmie, Who Killed Captain Alex?
Literature
Indeed, there is no one on earth who is righteous, no one who does what is right and never sins. Do not pay attention to every word people say, or you may hear your servant cursing you - for you know in your heart that many times you yourself have cursed others.
— The Bible, Ecclesiastes 7:20-22 NIV
Therefore you are without excuse, every man of you who passes judgment, for in that you judge another, you condemn yourself; for you who judge practice the same things.
Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, 'Let me take the speck out of your eye,' when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.
— The Bible, Matthew 7:1-5 NIV
Styles change, music gets hard to listen to, and hemlines bounce up and down like kids on a trampoline, but hypocrisy is the one thing that never goes out of style.
"Sometimes a hypocrite is nothing more than a man in the process of changing."
— Dalinar Kholin, The Stormlight Archive
Music
I believe in the family
With my ever-loving wife beside me
But she don't know about my girlfriend
Or the man I met last night
With my ever-loving wife beside me
But she don't know about my girlfriend
Or the man I met last night
— Genesis, "Jesus He Knows Me"
If you hate something, don't you do it, too
— Pearl Jam, "Not For You"
I said it, I meant it, that's the way I deal with enemies,
Like pro-lifers that support the death penalty!
And don't talk about war, when niggas know that you puss
A fuckin' hypocrite, draft-dodger like George Bush!
Like pro-lifers that support the death penalty!
And don't talk about war, when niggas know that you puss
A fuckin' hypocrite, draft-dodger like George Bush!
— Immortal Technique, "Obnoxious "
Up there on your soapbox so damn loud,
Preaching about mental health
But the only time you give a fuck
Is when it affects yourself!
Preaching about mental health
But the only time you give a fuck
Is when it affects yourself!
— RedHook, "Cure 4 Psycho"
Live-Action TV
"Eladio... you greasy, bloated pimp! You talk of honor, but you have none."
— Gus Fring, Better Call Saul
King Richard IV: Chiswick, remind me to send flowers to the King of France, in sympathy for the death of his son.
Lord Chiswick: The one you had murdered, my Lord?
Richard: Yes, that's the fellow.
Lord Chiswick: The one you had murdered, my Lord?
Richard: Yes, that's the fellow.
"If you don't stick to your values when they're being tested, they're not values, they're hobbies."
"Hypocrisy is like violence in your movies. If you only let the bad guys use it, the bad guys win."
— Lee Moldaver, Fallout (2024)
"Look at that! How dare she invade your privacy like that. Perverse!"
— Joe Goldberg while doing the exact same thing to Beck, You (2018)
Logan: I don't want to live with a guy who's all conceited and full of himself!
Michael: My, my, is it getting a little ironic in here?
Michael: My, my, is it getting a little ironic in here?
— Zoey 101, "Rumor of Love"
Podcasts
Hilbert: Dammit Eiffel, are you trying to get us all killed?!
Eiffel: Why yes, Mr. Pot, Mr. Kettle is looking a little black today...
Eiffel: Why yes, Mr. Pot, Mr. Kettle is looking a little black today...
— Wolf 359, Gas Me Twice
Professional Wrestling
AJ Styles: You see, Dominik. There's gonna come a time when you can't hide behind Judgment Day, because the OC's gonna pick them off, one by one by one.
Finn Bálor: AJ, you're the one to talk about hiding, you're the one that's hiding in The Club right now. Yeah. That's right, The Club that I started. And while I'm being honest, ever since I left The Club and moved on, everyone that came after me is living off my legacy. Today, The Judgment Day are in town, step up and get pulled down.
Finn Bálor: AJ, you're the one to talk about hiding, you're the one that's hiding in The Club right now. Yeah. That's right, The Club that I started. And while I'm being honest, ever since I left The Club and moved on, everyone that came after me is living off my legacy. Today, The Judgment Day are in town, step up and get pulled down.
— WWE Raw, October 24, 2022
Stand-up Comedy
"And it's even worse because Bill Cosby has the fuckin' smuggest old black man public persona that I hate. He gets on TV, "Pull yo' pants up, black people. I was on TV in the '80s! I can talk down to you, cause I had a successful sitcom!" Yeah, but you rape women, Bill Cosby, so, kinda brings you down a couple notches. "I don't curse on stage!" Well, yeah, you a rapist, so, I'll take you sayin' lots of "motherfuckers" if you weren't a rapist."
Video Games
"Hey! You might be getting better, but nobody cheats better than Waluigi! You got that?!"
— Waluigi, Mario Golf: Toadstool Tour
Steven Armstrong: Making the mother of all omelettes here, Jack. Can't fret over every egg!
Raiden: Not when you're "purging the weak", right? What do you know about "the weak"? You weren't born poor. You've never been hungry. You don't know what it's like to fight and steal and kill just to survive!
Raiden: Not when you're "purging the weak", right? What do you know about "the weak"? You weren't born poor. You've never been hungry. You don't know what it's like to fight and steal and kill just to survive!
June Moone: I can't help it. She has to be let out.
Superman: But you'll hurt innocent people.
Enchantress: Since when is that a problem for you?
Superman: But you'll hurt innocent people.
Enchantress: Since when is that a problem for you?
Green Lantern: Why do you hate me, Grodd?
Gorilla Grodd: Your arrogance is unbearable.
Green Lantern: Pfft. Pot, meet kettle.
Gorilla Grodd: Your arrogance is unbearable.
Green Lantern: Pfft. Pot, meet kettle.
Sindel: You're loyal only to yourself.
Kano: There's the pot calling the kettle black.
Sindel: I like that in a man.
Kano: There's the pot calling the kettle black.
Sindel: I like that in a man.
Webcomics
Lemme get this straight... you guys wanna permanently separate Pokémon from humans somehow, so that Pokémon will finally be our equals? And in order to do that, you guys attack Pokémon with your own? What is this I don't even—
— Black, Black Adventures
Loki: I'm mostly here to keep you from cheating.
Hel: You hypocrite! You cheat all the time!
Loki: I'm not taking a principled stand against cheating, sweetie. I just don't want you to do it right now. It's hard to be a hypocrite when your guiding philosophy is, "Do whatever's best for you."
Hel: You hypocrite! You cheat all the time!
Loki: I'm not taking a principled stand against cheating, sweetie. I just don't want you to do it right now. It's hard to be a hypocrite when your guiding philosophy is, "Do whatever's best for you."
Web Original
It is just odd Seagal is now proud to be a police reserve even though it could be argued he is now working for 'the man' despite preaching against it in many of his movies. There’s a word for that...
— Miles Antwiler on
The Patriot (1998)
The Patriot (1998)If you're side-eying Chloe for calling a trick "crass" when she sucked Vincent Gallo's dick in front of a camera, then you need to stop. Chloe sucked that big douche dick in the name of art!
Grade: I'm sure everyone's experienced this as I have. You can some shit, lazy teacher who always teaches in one boring shit monotonous way, but whenever there's a guest at the back of the room observing him, he completely changes. There's more activities he normally never does, there's mini assessments, there's group activities, there's everything! He even talks different!
Teacher Under: Alright, yer little bastards! Everyone get out yer text books and turn to Page 69 aga...(gasps and sees Queen Elizabeth II observing the class). Uh..okay class, listen! Today we're going to learn about 3D shapes, so erm...we're all going to Egypt to learn about pyramids! Yay!
Teacher Under: Alright, yer little bastards! Everyone get out yer text books and turn to Page 69 aga...(gasps and sees Queen Elizabeth II observing the class). Uh..okay class, listen! Today we're going to learn about 3D shapes, so erm...we're all going to Egypt to learn about pyramids! Yay!
Schlafly, the heroine of the Values Voter Debate, is a published author of nine books, three-time candidate for the U.S. Congress, a full-time law student at Washington University in St. Louis, editor of a monthly newsletter, a twice-a-week syndicated newspaper columnist, regular speaker at anti-liberal rallies, and employs a full-time housekeeper to take care of her mansion – in other words, she follows her anti-emancipatory arguments and consistently claims that women should stay at home as the Bible requires, by setting a splendid example.
— Encyclopedia of American Loons on Phyllis Schlafly
on Phyllis SchlaflyI shouldn't be surprised about the way he treats the Dursleys' other child as a mere tool in his schemes, but considering he described Darth Dumbledore as treating people in the same way, it's hilarious in a darkly comedic way.
—Minettes K. Vareninova, on Jared Ornstead, Das Sporking
The right wing believes three things. One, that free speech is important; two, that cancel culture is bad; and three, there are a lot of books that you need to be barred from ever having access to.
— John Iadarola, The Damage Report
Zephia: When I called the Hounds my family, I meant every word of it. You, me, Marni...
(cut to footage of Zephia fatally stabbing Marni with the text, "Same Person BTW")
(cut to footage of Zephia fatally stabbing Marni with the text, "Same Person BTW")
You can't remind [Eminem] how if he's going to accuse Joe Budden of domestic abuse on "Fall" that songs like "Kim" exist and allegations have lingered around Eminem for years. You can't tell him that Tyler, the Creator's more personal hero is more Pharrell than D12 and that the cheap homophobic insults show an MC defaulting to slurs that are really just beneath him at his age and at this time. You can't tell him that going at Machine Gun Kelly on "Not Alike" for creepy comments made about Hailie don't exactly excuse the literal dozens of creepy references that Eminem himself has made to women, both in and out of hip-hop! You can't tell him that despite on the very first song "The Ringer", his correct assertion that mentioning names will give them clout and diminish him, he spends the rest of the damn album dropping names. You can't tell him that even as he acknowledges the last album didn't quite get to the deeper political points he wanted to make, that the wordplay, it didn't go over the heads of the critics and the media, or that despite his venom directed at the current president, he's just a step away from calling out "Fake News!" in order to dismiss the critics.
Western Animation
"Francine, how can you be so selfish? I'm doing this for me!
— Stan Smith, American Dad!, "Lincoln Lover"
"For a man who likes electric cars he sure does burn a lot of rocket fuel."
— Lisa Simpson on Elon Musk, The Simpsons
Emily: Was talk of virtue just pretension?
Was I too naïve to expect you
To heed the morals you're purveying?
Charlie: That's what the fuck I've been saying!
Both: If Hell is forever then Heaven must be a lie
If angels can do whatever, and remain in the sky!
The rules are shades of gray
When you don't do as you say
When you make the wretched suffer just to kill them again!
Was I too naïve to expect you
To heed the morals you're purveying?
Charlie: That's what the fuck I've been saying!
Both: If Hell is forever then Heaven must be a lie
If angels can do whatever, and remain in the sky!
The rules are shades of gray
When you don't do as you say
When you make the wretched suffer just to kill them again!
— "You Didn't Know", Hazbin Hotel, "Welcome to Heaven"
Real Life
"How is it that we hear the loudest yelps for liberty among the drivers of negroes?"
— Samuel Johnson on the American Revolution
"The sign that points toward Boston doesn't have to go there."
— Max Scheler (1874-1928), arguing that one needn't practice what one preaches
"A hypocrite is a person who—but who isn't?"
— Don Marquis (1878-1937)
"Some folks in this world spend their whole time hunting after righteousness, and can't find any time to practice it."
— Josh Billings
