A form of Black Comedy where a character misses another character for shallow, selfish reasons, such as money. Let's say Alice has died. Or, she has gone away for a long time, perhaps never to return; point is, you're never going to see her again. This trope is when another character, say Bob, expresses sadness over Alice's passing...but not because Bob actually misses Alice. Rather, he's sad that Alice will never be able to pay back the $5 she owes him. Doesn't necessarily have to be about owing a debt. This would be any example where someone misses a dead character for unconventional and/or inappropriate reasons. A common variant is Alice's family members bawling their hearts out, eliciting sympathy from a passerby... only to be informed that they didn't get anything in the will. Compare If You Die, I Call Your Stuff.
- In Durarara!!, Kadota's gang are devastated when they find out their friend Kaztano has been kidnapped, but none so much as Togusa, who even claimed he couldn't go on without the man. No one can be there for Togusa like Kaztano. Why? Because Kaztano was his source for sold-out, front row tickets to see Idol Singer Ruri Hijiribe.
- Done by America in Axis Powers Hetalia. When England 'dies' in the hospital after an accident involving the panjandrum, America gets teary eyed and tells him he can't go because he owes him a 'crap-ton of money'.
- In Pyramids, one of the surviving student assassins mourns the one who didn't make it, noting, "He still owed me money".
- In A Hat Full of Sky a shopkeeper is horrified to see his wizard assistant turned into a frog and a big, pink, gloopy blob:
"Please, please turn him back! I could never get a real wizard for what I pay him!"
- In an episode of Happy Endings, Max comes in after just leaving his hairdresser's funeral. He quickly says 'the real tragedy is I need a haircut and I have no one to go to!'
- In the first episode of Red Dwarf, Dave Lister's first reaction when he finally gets that Everybody's Dead, Dave and is told that he's three million years in the future is "Three million years?! I've still got that library book!"
- In Scary Movie, one girl is outraged to find a fellow student has been murdered...because she planned to cheat off said student's test that day.
- "Weird Al" Yankovic's song "Why Does This Always Happen to Me" is all about this, complete with $5 reference. A news flash comes on to tell about a devastating earthquake, and he mourns the fact that he was recording The Simpsons and will have to do it again. His friend dies in a traffic accident, and he mourns the $5 the friend owed him, and that he'll be late to work now. He stabs his boss, and mourns the knife, which broke and will never be as sharp again.
- The song "Superman" by Atmosphere. In the song, the narrator suddenly finds he has superman-like powers. While walking down the street, he runs into two aquaintances. While attempting to give one of them a fist-bump, he accidently kills hims with his superstrength. The other friend, heard in the background, is seemingly heartbroken, and laments "Why you gotta squish my friend, dude?"...until you hear him say, "That dude owed me, like, five dollars. Why you gotta kill him?"
- One Garfield strip had a spider introducing Garfield to his "big" brother. After Garfield casually smashes him, he says "Hey! He owed me money!"
- In Borderlands you often get this reaction from NPCs when you break bad news to them. For example when you tell Scooter that T.K. (a Cool Old Guy you meet in the first town) is dead, he angrily laments that he never returned his tools.
- In Dragon Age II, Merrill misses the Qunari after they commited a massacre in Kirkwall and left, just because they "were easy on the eyes".
- Yet Another Fantasy Gamer Comic, when Court Mage Meegs lost her apprentice. She wept so hard even an orc tried to console her, while...
Meegs: (thinking) By the gods!!! Now I have to go through that damned apprentice audition process again!!
- Homestar Runner plays this straight with Frank Bennedetto (a popcorn popper), complete with the $5 lament example from the description.
- In Alternate Reality Dragon Ball Z, Krillin gets in tears whenever Vegeta dies. Because he was carrying his borrowed iPod.
- After Sparadrap's pets were killed in Noob, deeply saddening her Man Child guildmate in the process, Gaea's apparent sympathy reaction turned out to be along the lines of "Darn, one of my potential revenue sources just got destroyed".
- The Futurama episode, The Sting, has Fry sacrifice himself to save Leela, causing Bender to be devastated over his friend's death:
Leela: Fry? He's..he's dead!Bender: Oh, who will make Bender waffles just the way he likes them now?
- In an episode of Archer, Archer's fiance has just performed a Heroic Sacrifice by tackling evil cyborg Barry off a building. She dies, Barry is just fine, and Archer is in tears over this senseless tragedy. So is Doctor Krieger; they landed on and crushed his beloved van.
- In South Park, after Kenny is Killed Off for Real, the boys discover that he has the winning ticket to a candy store shopping spree, so they decide to build a ladder to heaven in order for him to give it to them. But when adults ask what they're doing they don't mention the candy part, they just say they want to see Kenny again.
- In the SpongeBob SquarePants episode, Neptune's Spatula, Spongebob is about to be taken to Atlantis to be King Neptune's top fry cook after beating him in a contest. This would mean separating Spongebob from his friends. Mr. Krabs is saddened not because he lost his best fry cook, but because he betted on King Neptune.