Knows a Guy Who Knows a Guy

Squidward: YOU'RE RIGHT!

This trope is where a character states a relationship with someone else through a long and indirect chain of connections. The chain can be simple (I know this guy who knows this guy) to elaborate (My uncle's drinking buddy's doctor works with this guy whose brother's fiancee...). Sometimes, despite this, the person acts as if he or she knows the person really well. Other times, it's reversed; they really do know the person well, and are making up this long string of connections to legally distance themselves from the other party.

Usually the elaborate case is used as an hope/promise for a plan, which very rarely delivers.

See also Screw the Rules, I Have Connections!, where this is not only true, but makes a character significantly powerful.


Examples:

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    Anime & Manga 
  • Doraemon plays with this. Taking advantage of the "Six Degrees Of Separation" theory via one of the usual Imported Alien Phlebotinum, Nobita is able to meet celebrities and other famous people at will. Apparently the device has a few bugs to work out given that amusing things can happen if the names of the people you want to meet are too similar.

    Fan Fic 

    Film 
  • From The Emperor's New Groove:
    Chicha: So, remind me again how you're related to Pacha?
    Yzma: Why, I'm his third cousin's brother's wife's step-niece's great aunt. (beat) Twice removed.
  • This is how Six Degrees of Separation works.
  • Spaceballs:
    Dark Helmet: I am your father's brother's nephew's cousin's former roommate.
    Lone Starr: So... what's that make us?
    Dark Helmet: Absolutely nothing... which is what you are about to become!
  • From Ferris Bueller's Day Off:
    My best friend's sister's boyfriend's brother's girlfriend heard from this guy that knows this girl who's going with a guy that saw Ferris passed out at 31 flavors last night. I guess its pretty serious.
  • From Hot Fuzz: "That's Auntie Jackie's sister's brother's boy". That he doesn't just say 'my cousin' suggests complicated relationships... or just Rule of Funny.
  • From Sharpay's Fabulous Adventure:
    "I texted Bridget, who e-mailed Constance, who tweeted Bethany, who IM’ed Jenn, who Facebooked Kara, who has an ex-friend who she caught with her boyfriend, who she then dumped, so now Kara’s her friend again, who knows of a New York apartment available in a luxury townhouse."
  • From Jetsons: The Movie
    Judy Jetson:"I just found out Doris told Susie and Susie told Mary and Mary told Francie and Francie told me Helen took my date with Cosmo!"
  • Monsters, Inc.: Boo is Sully's cousin's sister's daughter. Why he didn't just say cousin's daughter is probably trying to invoke this for "Bring an Obscure Relative to Work Day".
  • From Sexy Beast:
    Don:"I know a bloke, who knows a bloke, who knows a bloke. Now you know this bloke."
    Gal:"Do I?"
    Don:"This is a bloke you know."
  • In Conan the Destroyer, Conan's sidekick told the heroes that his "brother's sister's cousin" knew a secret entrance into the Big Bad's palace. (Exactly why his "brother's sister" wasn't also his sister is something he doesn't explain; fortunately, the secret entrance is there.)
  • In Starsky & Hutch, Huggy Bear uses this to explain how he got his new Lincoln.
    "It's a '76. Won't be out 'til next year. But I know some people that know some people that robbed some people."
  • Luis does this multiple times in Ant-Man. For added hilarity, he voices everyone when recounting this to the audience.
  • In Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, Ron, who is currently not on speaking terms with Harry, has Hermione relay the news to him that Hagrid wants to see him. This bit of news had apparently been relayed through several other people before reaching Ron, and Hermione frustratedly tries to list them all out. She gives up when Harry asks her to repeat the list. Later, Ron reveals that he actually heard the news directly from Hagrid and made up the rest of the chain.

    Literature 
  • In Life, the Universe and Everything, Effrafax of Wug got rid of the mountain he was supposed to render invisible with the aid of "his friends, and his friends' friends, and his friends' friends' friends, and his friend's friends' friends' friends, and some rather less good friends of theirs who happened to own a major stellar trucking company".
  • In Michael Connelly book The Gods of Guilt, Cisco says he knows "some people who know some people".
  • In Mark Twain's "Two Little Tales" the second tale features an elaborate one of these which stretches from the son of a cesspool emptier to the emperor. The son's best friend, a chimney-sweep, comments on it:
    It's a philosophy, you see. Mighty good word—and large. It goes on this idea: everybody in the world, little and big, has one special friend, a friend that he's glad to do favors to—not sour about it, but glad—glad clear to the marrow. And so, I don't care where you start, you can get at anybody's ear that you want to—I don't care how low you are, nor how high he is. And it's so simple: you've only to find the first friend, that is all; that ends your part of the work. He finds the next friend himself, and that one finds the third, and so on, friend after friend, link after link, like a chain; and you can go up it or down it, as high as you like or as low as you like.

    Live Action Television 
  • SyFy's Alice has:
    Hatter: I know some people, who know some, well, other people.
  • This is how Saul arranges a meeting between Walter White and Gus Fring in Breaking Bad.
  • From Cheers:
    Sam: I know a guy who knows a guy...
    Diane: And he's a bookie?
    Sam: No, but he knows a guy who is.
  • In Burn Notice, Sam's key role is being "the guy who knows a guy". The amount of contacts he has is absurd, even for a former Navy SEAL who's had quite a lot of meetings with other departments of the government in his time.
  • This is the only explanation for where the martial artists of Power Rangers Jungle Fury got their hands on high tech morphers. Y'see, the substitute mentor knows a guy who knows a guy who has an uncle who's has a connection ...
  • The pilot of A Bit of Fry and Laurie closes with the following snippet:
    Stephen Fry: ...I'd just found out that Dernik isn't my real father.
    Hugh Laurie: He isn't? Then who is?
    Fry: I am.
    Laurie: Then that must mean that you must be...
    Fry: Exactly. Devlin's half-sister's wife's doctor's cousin's niece!
    Laurie: Well then who the hell am I?
    Fry: I dunno mate, but it's your round!
  • In Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, Odo teases Dr. Bashir a little over the latter being nominated for a very prestigious medical award.
    "Well, according to my friend, her friend heard something from his cousin, which his wife heard from the council member, which I thought you might find interesting...."
    • Garak seems to have an inexhastive supply of "Contacts on Cardassia" that he can call upon to assist the plot. This is usually played for humor, but the episode "In the Pale Moon Light" plays this serious as many of these contacts are people who, while vaguely described, make Sisko second guess the need for their service just by the morally high prices that those contacts ask. Inverted as well, as one contact thinks Sisko was nothing but a Dirty Old Man and jokes around about what Sisko wants him to do... that is, unitl Sisko tells the guy it was Garak who made the meeting possible, which horrifies the contact into better behaving himself.
  • Subverted in That '70s Show when Eric and Kelso are buying promise rings for Donna and Jackie, and Kelso brings them to an alley.
    Eric: Kelso, this doesn't look like a ring store.
    Kelso: Don't worry, I know a guy who knows a guy.
    [Leo walks into the alley]
    Leo: Hey, dudes.
    Eric: Wait, Leo's the guy? I thought you said you knew a guy who knew a guy.
    Kelso: Yeah, I do.
    Eric: I know Leo.
    Kelso: OK, so you're the guy.
  • In a Leverage Christmas episode, Nate gifts Eliot with a samurai sword, explained thusly:
    I know a guy, who knows a guy, who knows a samurai.
  • In the Buffy the Vampire Slayer episode "Band Candy", Mr. Trick admits to Mayor Wilkins the evil plan for the episode is outside his area of expertise, but he knows "a beast who knows a guy".
  • How To Rock has Kacey claim to know Big Time Rush this way and insist she can get tickets to see them because of it. At the end of the episode, it turns out that, despite the very tenuous connection between them, they remember her too.

    Music 
  • Tom Lehrer's song "Lobachevsky" has an exaggeratedly long one of these:
    I have a friend in Minsk,
    Who has a friend in Pinsk,
    Whose friend in Omsk
    Has friend in Tomsk
    With friend in Akmolinsk.
    His friend in Alexandrovsk
    Has friend in Petropavlovsk,
    Whose friend somehow is solving now
    The problem in Dnepropetrovsk.
Then the next verse runs through the whole thing again backward, somehow adding two more towns into the "chain".
  • The chorus of Gaelic Storm's song "Johnny Tarr".
    And even if you saw it yourself, you wouldn't believe it,
    I wouldn't trust a person like me, if I were you
    Sure I wasn't there, but I swear I have an alibi
    I heard it from a man who knows a fella who says it's true
  • According to a Helsinki documentary they hosted, the Leningrad Cowboys got in contact with the Alexandrov Red Army Ensemble because they knew someone who knew someone who knew someone who knew someone (repeat a couple times over) who had the ensemble's phone number.
  • In Weird Al's song "Lame Claim to Fame", one of the singer's said lame claims to fame is that he knows a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy who knows Kevin Bacon. note 

    Mythology 
  • Urban Legends are often purported to happen to such people. In fact, folklorists who study Urban Legends have the acronym "F.O.A.F." which stands for Friend Of A Friend. The fact that such legends are often proven false or at least never proven conclusively could be seen as a variant on the "promise that never delivers" part of the trope.

    Video Games 
  • Played with in Driver: San Francisco: One mission involves playing as two undercover cops to defuse a couple of truck bombs on the highway. Once the madman reveals he has around half a dozen more cruising the city, Tanner remarks the trope name. This is referencing Tanner's shifting ability to possess any driver on the road which he uses to locate and defuse the rest of the bombs.
  • A note found in The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim is from a bandit who claims that he "knows a guy whose cousin knows a guy" that could set them up for life, if they steal more than their take from the bandit leader. By the way, you also find his corpse later.
  • In Grim Fandango, two guys can be overheard discussing Double-N Tickets (which are rumoured to be sold by the Big Bad Hector). One of them points out that these tickets can't be just bought, leading to this exchange:
    Guy 1: Well I know somebody who knows somebody who knows-uh... HECTOR LEMANS.
    Guy 2: Wow. You know EVERYBODY!
  • In Hearthstone the Flavor Text for the card I Know A Guy is "Well… a guy who knows a guy."

    Webcomics 
  • Rogue in 8-Bit Theater has "I know a guy" as his catchphrase. One of said guys is even Thief.
  • The Order of the Stick: Belkar suggests selling some captured enemies into slavery, adding that he "know[s] a guy who knows a guy" to contact for this. Much later, we meet the guy in question, Buggy Lou. His best supplier on the Northern Continent was pals with Belkar.
  • In Exterminatus Now, Eastwood knows a guy who knows a guy that can examine the artifact that a bunch of heavily armed mercenaries tried to steal from them. He forgot exactly which friend he knew this guy through, though...which bites him in the ass since said friend turns out to have been Silas Morth, who is behind the whole operation and is blackmailing the examiner into delivering the artifact to him.

    Western Animation 
  • SpongeBob SquarePants: As indicated from the page quote, in "The Camping Episode", SpongeBob tries to warn Squidward that 'Sea Bears are no laughing matter' by claiming that he knew this guy who knew this guy who knew this guy(and so on).
    • In the episode "Suds", Patrick tells SpongeBob of the horrors of the doctor's office which he knows because "I know a guy who knows a guy who went to the doctor once".
  • Totally Spies!: When asked how Clover was able to get tickets to an event, she says:
    "Oh it was easy! The manager of the arena has a cousin who lives next door to a guy who's best friends with a man who's married to a childhood classmate of a mother of a guy I know from the football team. I just flirted with him and he got the tickets for me."
  • Animaniacs: Yakko explains in song why he is now the king of Anvilania:
    Yakko: I'm the cousin to the sister / Of son's niece's brother / Of the uncle's daughter's father / Of the nephew's sister's mother / And my grandpa's only cousin / Was the King's daughter's sibling, / But they're all gone,
    Crowd: So that is why
    Yakko: I am now your king!
  • In Ben 10: Omniverse, this is Fistrick's explanation on how he was able to reach another planet, learn about their exploitable resources, and turn the local wildlife into a massive army;
    Ben: How did you get on Renovah?
    Fistrick: I know a guy.
    Ben: And how did you know about the fruits?
    Fistrick: I know a guy who knows a guy.
    Ben: And how did you teach the Muroids how to operate technology? Oh, let me guess: you know a guy.
    Fistrick: Knew a guy.
  • Freaky Stories: Every episode started with "This is a true story. It happened to a friend of a friend of mine". (Except for the Musical Episode where, for reasons of rhyme and scansion, it happened "to a friend of a friend of a friend".)

http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/KnowsAGuyWhoKnowsAGuy