Funny / The Wedding Singer

  • Robbie pointing out how bad Linda is at communicating.
    Linda: Oh, yeah - sure! Living in your sister's basement with five kids while you're off every weekend doing wedding gigs at a whoppin' sixty bucks a pop?
    Robbie: Once again, things that could've been brought to my attention YESTERDAY!
  • Robbie's bitter and angry wedding performance after being stood up by Linda. Especially the "Love Stinks" part.
    • While Robbie's getting beaten up by the aggravated father of the bride, one of the "mutants" is biting on the father's leg.
  • When Robbie sings "Somebody Kill Me Please", mood swinging from happy to incredibly angry to suicidal.
  • Steve Buscemi delivering an absolutely picture perfect cameo as an utterly blitzed best man.
    • Which leads to a hilarious pay-off when he appears as a wedding singer in Robbie and Julia's wedding at the end.
  • "He's losing his mind!...and I'm reaping all the benefits!"
    • The way he slowly closes the curtain while staring with his bug eyes really sold that line.
  • "How're you doing, sir! Chicken or fish?"
  • Grandma Rosie's letter in the stage musical, sung sweetly just like a loving grandmother, ending with this lyric:
    Rosie: And if you're feeling sad, remember... that Linda is... ... ... a skanky hoe.
  • The look on Billy Idol's face when the old lady asks what the mile high club is.
    • And the old Asian guy behind him who has the same look.
  • The drunk old man at the bar after Glenn punches Robbie in the face and jokes that he should write a song about it.
    Old Man: (thoughtfully) Sounds like a country song!
  • Robbie learning Glenn's last name

    Robbie: I don't even know your last name.
    Glenn: It's Guglia.
    Robbie: Guglia? Oh, so Julia's last name's gonna be Guglia. Julia Guglia! That's funny!
    Glenn: [unamused] Why is that funny?
    Robbie: I - don't know.

    • Later...
    Julia: [into the mirror in her wedding dress] Hi. Nice to meet you. I'm Mrs. Julia Guglia.
    (disgusted at the sound of it)
    Julia: Hi, it's nice to meet you I'm Mrs. Julia Guglia...
    (laughs, breaks out in tears, pauses, then smiles; starts to practice saying Robbie's last name.)

  • Robbie testing to see if Glenn's a cad:
    Robbie:[looking at a sexy waitress; monotone voice] My, God. That is a luscious ass.
    Glenn: [smiling] That's premium grade, top choice meat.

    • Funnier, Robbie is only pretending to be that hammy, but Glenn actually is that way.
  • One of Robbie's nephews calla Linda a "bitch".
    • He also made a mean drawing of her. Robbie said it wasn't nice but was quite a good drawing.
  • Someone asks Robbie if he feels like shit after being left at the alter.
    Robbie: No, man, it feels great. Hey, my parents died when I was 10, wanna talk about that?
    • Then later, Robbie's parting shot:
    Robbie: Hey, have a few drinks then drive home, okay?