Funny: Final Fantasy XIII
- The opening cinematic to Chapter 12 contains one for Snow. He waves to a cheering crowd...conveniently forgetting about his l'Cie brand. Once the guards start mobilizing, he realizes what just happened.
Snow: Oops...probably should've covered that.
- When Sazh jumps after Lightning and land on his face...then the chocobo chick sticks a landing that would make an Olympic gymnast proud, complete with its wings stuck up in the air.
- Just before Fang gets her Eidolon, she talks about how she's made up her mind. The Eidolon appears and she says it's for l'Cie who are indecisive. Just after Snow protects her, you can hear him say, "So, you haven't made up your mind yet?"
- Early on when Snow and Hope are attempting to get to Hope's house, there's a pair of civilians whose plight the player can hear of if he or she decides to get close to them. It's a father and son that were separated in the commotion. Only it's the father that starts to whine about how he should have listened to his son when he was told to stay where he was when they were separated. When you clear out the enemies and they can get together, the son will scold his much older father.
- All of the guys looking away in embarrassment when Fang checks Vanille's brand. Hope covering his eyes and coughing is just sort of hilariously adorable.
- Hope and Vanille falling to their deaths in the opening cinematic for chapter 11, made funnier by virtue of being a split second piece of dialogue in the middle of a CMOA.:
Vanille: Are you okay?Hope: Oh yeah! I'm GREAT!
- Sazh and the chocobo chick during the "Save the Chocobos" mission:
Sazh: Hurry the what up?
- This one is repeatable, since it happens in gameplay, but requires some timing: do a Paradigm shift and watch your party strike their Angels Pose...followed immediately by a mob knocking one of them flat on their ass. Whilst the other two just stand there looking cool (or attempting to).
- Even better when the enemy uses an attack that launches the character into the air. The ring that appears around the character when Paradigm shift occurs is there, and the camera will focus on it, but your character will be flying through the air.
- If a party member is launched just before another member heals or buffs them, they have a chance of spouting their character-specific "thanks!" line... while being juggled Smash Bros. style by a Behemoth. And, of course, the simple sight of your medic desperately chucking cure spells at someone who is soaring through the air is completely hilarious by itself.
- Chapter 12, the party casually jumps off a ledge, leaving Vanille to wonder what they're doing before following. The group falls through the air in free fall as Vanille waves her limbs and screams, and Lightning activates the Grav-Con Unit for them to land in safely.
- Sazh's finisher when Brynhildr is in Gesthalt Mode. The way that he and the Frocobo land splat on the ground next to Brynhildr is great.
- Mark 34. Here comes Zenobia the Butcher, and you're expecting her to be a tougher fight than most of the Undying marks preceding her...until a fucking tonberry shows up and steals your kill. With a knife. In one hit. What. Of course, Final Fantasy veterans already know what to expect of those critters.
- While wandering Pulse, you can come across some of the sheep. Vanille walks up to a larger one, grabs it, then yanks a tuft of its wool off so hard it sends the thing crashing to its side when it comes off.
- Early on when Vanille is left with Sazh, she's climbing up a piece of rubble/machinery. While it isn't intentional, Sazh looks up and is about to get a full view of Vanille. The chocobo chick blocks his view and chirps indignantly.
- Doubling as a Moment of Awesome, the time Sazh's chocobo took down a mook. By itself. Killer Rabbit indeed.
- When Vanille passes a group of sheep in Nautilus, she says the following:
Vanille: Look at these wooly little things! I just wanna squeeze 'em till they pop!
- Sazh gets one if he's your party leader in the final battle against Orphan.
"...I definitely don't wanna meet your parents!"
- Made funnier by the fact that he kind of already did, in the previous phase of the battle.
- "All this dampness is damp!"
- Sazh gets one when he and Vanille go together after the plane crash. A piece of debris is blocking their path and you have to operate a machine to get rid of it. Said piece of debris comes towards them, increasing at speed causing Sazh to go:
- Yet another for Sazh, when Vanille asks who the Primarch is.
- After Anima has been fought and the party are now l'Cie:
Snow: (to Vanille) You too?Vanille: Mm-hmm. (lifts her skirt, revealing her brand) Right here.Snow: (awkwardly, while turning away) Okay...
- Using Sazh against one of Bartandelus' forms and using a paradigm shift net you this jem:
- During the cutscene for the opening of Chapter 11, when the party gets attacked by an enormous flying monster, we get this:
Fang: He thinks we're lunch.Sazh: Yeah, like a l'Cie food buffet.Lightning: "Cie food". Cute.
- Made even funnier by the fact that they say it in a complete deadpan and unworried manner, despite that the monster poses a legitimate threat.
- The Running Gag of Snow taking a swing at Barthandelus whenever he appears and Barthandelus casually blasts him back before continuing to speak to the party.
- Near the start of the game, during the battle between NORA and the Sanctum, Vanille discards her cloak, revealing a colorful outfit that seems completely out of place among the destruction around her, heads over to Hope, and hands him an assault rifle with a cheery "Here you go!", like it's a packet of sweets.
- One line, uttered by our favorite funny man when he first lays eyes on the Gigantuar.
Sazh: SWEET MERCY!!
Sazh: That thing is gonna Gran the Pulse right out of us!
- Sazh in general is great at pre-battle quotes. Meet an adamantoise?
- The skit with Lightning and Snow's voice actors for the game's launch party.
- When Snow's a prisoner, he's looking at Serah's crystal tear, and:
*Fang hits Snow on the back of the head*Fang: (while shaking her hand) "Ahh! I knew you were hard-headed, but-"Snow: (turning around) "Okay, that was- Oww!"