Funny / Dirty Potter

  • "Dirty Potter and the Fabulous Gay Farty Pee and Poo Party. Chapter Poo...* ahem* I mean, Two."
  • "I usually save it for book signings" said J.K. Rowling.
  • "Then J.K. Rowling suddenly let loose a great echoing fart, sending him face-first into the table, and Ron was ass-blasted off his feet, so forcefully, he shot straight into another fucking dimension."
  • Any moment with sound effects created entirely out of the dialogue, such as the infamous "skeet" sound.
  • The giving gifts sequence in Dirty the Pooh.
    "For Roo, a bottle of magic mushrooms for his first day at school. For Kanga, a set of seven rubbery cocks, one for each day of the week. Eeyore did not know what a cock was, or what it did, but it sounded necessary. For Tigger, a pogo stick up the butthole."
  • "After that, a new game became popular in the Forest. It was called "doing the bitch."
  • In Dirty the Pooh chapter 3, Ron is blasted into the Hundred Acre Wood and encounters the demon spiders. In order to escape them, he tries to noclip and fly away, but he falls through the floor and is immediately permabanned by Jim Dale, which according to him is very good because he had no friends and was a huge noob.
  • At the same time as its qualification for Nightmare Fuel, Jim Dale malfunctioning in Fuckbeak and Friends Chapter 2 can come across as this, particularly with the claim of, "Every book on for you by Jim Daaaaaaaaaaaaale..."
    • This exchange just as Jim Dale starts malfunctioning:
    Jim Dale: (Slightly breaking into laughter) Stop the tape!
  • The hilariously cliché lyrics to Jim Dale's rap in Fuckbeak and Friends Chapter 2.
  • Fuckbeak and Friends Chapter 2. Harry spontaneously decides to put on a medieval suit of armour and starts having sex with a Dumbledore sex doll.
  • Fuckbeak and Friends Chapter 1:
    Jim Dale: Fuckbeak gave the middle finger to his computer and then he threw it as hard as he could against the wall. It was a smashing success.
  • Near the end of Fuckbeak and Friends Chapter 3, as Harry's penis gains the ability to percieve countless different universes, it finally ends up in the universe of Dirty Potter as narrated by Stephen Fry rather than Jim Dale. Jim Dale doesn't approve of this turn of events at all, but Stephen Fry quickly tells him to shut up.
    • Also a reality where Jim Dale's life is narrated by Harry Potter characters. He takes the time to admit how much he hates that reality.
  • Just try to imagine Jim Dale, MBE, established British actor and singer-songwriter with a career going back to the 1950s, making all those skeeting, pooing, and farting noises with his lips while he's in the recording booth. Then try listening to any of his actual audiobooks.