Funny / Blood is Mine

• With the hospital overrun by monsters, Jane has to move through the vents. When she meets Michelle, she says she's a vent hermit, eternally bound to her metal air transferring prison.
  Michelle: Y'know, not the strangest thing I've heard today.
• Fuse encounters the horrors of Howler's kitchen.
  You hazard a glance into the refrigerator. Some of it is soda, kept cold because that's what a refrigerator is for. Some of it is meat, which not even the refrigerator could save. Some of it is a bag of potato chips, because Howler did a lot of drugs.
  To be fair, he was also a conspiracy nut. Maybe he thought refrigerating chips would keep the aliens out of his head or something.
  You also check inside the oven. It takes you a second. This thing hasn't been opened in... a while. You finally manage to pry it open, and inside... inside is science. Things are growing in there. Long after the end, when this miserable planet is a smoldering wasteland, what was once in this oven will rule the new world. You shut the oven, comfortable in the knowledge that there are drugs out there that can scrub this memory from your brain.
• Our protagonist is naturally blond, so Michelle has been calling her "Blondie", even after she dyes her hair.
  Caius: Blondie? Who the hell is Blondie?
  Michelle: The brunette on the couch.
  There's a pause, Caius wrinkling his face as he tries to solve an unsolvable puzzle. He moves on without questioning it.
• While practicing controlling a rat, Blondie makes it dance.
• There's something inherently hilarious about Caius thinking that every lab-grown person is given "the gay gene".
  Fuse: Dr. Finch isn't here to back me up on this, but I don't think that science holds up. It sounds like bad science.
• It's hard to tell if Mom's red is completely humorless or just very deadpan, but talking to it can be rather funny.
  You ask if your parents had a secret bunker or hideout somewhere.
  Red: Yes. You are here.
• Macland's mind has two doors inside it, labeled "Heaven" and "Hekk".
• The federal agent has enough evidence to get Dr. Finch in trouble. The team wonders why she hasn't done anything with it. They jokingly suggest it's because Dr. Finch has seduced her.
• While they are trying to track down a specific drug dealer, Fuse and Caius have to talk to many small-time dealers. And since trying to get information is easier if you buy something first, they end up with a frankly ridiculous amount of drugs. They eventually use a magic ritual to "upgrade" these drugs.
  Fuse: We now have one cigarette worth... of tradesmen-grade super level.
  Caius: I'm gonna smoke tha whole thing.
  Fuse: I will fight you. We're obligated by bunker law to share it.
• Jane and Fuse protect themselves from a psychic attack by wearing tin foil hats.
  Michelle: Of all the stuff we've ran into, this... I dunno. I'm not buyin' it.
  Caius: Seriously? We got a bottomless pit, a space bunker and an alien growin' on our walls, you're drawin' tha line at tin foil hats?
  Michelle: Yes. Look, I gotta be skeptical about somethin', and I don't want Grizwald to be right about everything.
• "You were excited about having a plan until you thought about the plan more, and now you are less excited."
• When the team encounters new bioprinter monsters that resemble mosquitoes, Fuse calls them "mansquitoes".
• During one of her regular check-ups on Macland, Jane finds him doing something she'd prefer not to interrupt (and would like to unsee). She marks him down as "doing okay."
• Baby red is both adorable and hilarious.
  Baby red: All back? Was alone.
  Mom's red: You most certainly were not. I was here with you the entire time.
  Baby red: Alone. All alone.
  The large red has not eyes with which to roll, but you can feel its fleeting desire for a pair.
• Lydia has her priorities straight.
  Lydia: We could override some of Reigns' network's programming with a message to the city, or an awesome ad for the podcast.
• Jane wonders how her Eldritch Abomination mother would've normally reproduced.
  Caius: That's never a question ya wanna ask.
• Bunker E's real entrance is a blue police box.
• The team is unimpressed with Michelle's punning skills.
  Dr. Finch: Are you a fan of ancient myth, Michelle...?
  Michelle: Nah, not really. I just always thought it'd be a cool name for a gun. The Gorgon: Kill a man dead. STONE dead.
  Dr. Finch sighs. Caius and Fuse throw their hands up almost simultaneously.
• Jane asks Macland's help in delivering some important objects from another city. He has it covered.
  Macland: I can get connections real quick. This may come as a shock, but I have a lot of money. More shocking still, people love money.
  You mention that it'll be late at night, and you don't know exactly what time. You tell him the city the warehouse is located in... but you won't know what your window is until it happens.
  Macland: Mmmmmmoney.
• "Everyone's eating grilled cheese sandwiches... somehow, despite the bunker's lack of cooking equipment. Surely, the greatest mystery of all."
• Lovers' description of Ace of Cups is hilarious and accurate.
  Lovers: He wears a long coat, has a haircut that you see and you think, "only a complete asshole could have that haircut." And then, the bloke opens his mouth, and you feel like a psychic.
• The library us a very mind-screwy place. Even the red is rendered speechless.
  Your human brain says that those books have been there the whole time, definitely, and looked exactly like that from the beginning and nothing has changed.
  Your red says O_O
• For an Eldritch Location, the library can get pretty snarky.
  The library: w e l c o m e g o d s a p l i n g (Finally. Geez.)
  You ask the being who it is.
  The library: i a m t h e l i b r a r y (I thought that was pretty obvious.)
• Even as a ghostly astral projection, Caius still manages to snark at Fuse.
  The faint voice of Caius comes calling, as if it were a message carried on the wind. "...Nerd..."
• The team decides to name one of their new rats Pac-Man (because it will be sent into a giant maze). Michelle disagrees.
  Michelle: He ain't a man, though. He's a rat. ...A Pac-Rat.
  Sighs and groans fill the room.
• When Jane trades away several flesh golems she made, the tradesmen give her one improved golem that looks exactly like a doll-sized version of her. It even wears the same dress she does. The team thinks it's hilarious and starts to wonder if tradesmen have a sense of humor.
• After encountering what looks like giant spider webs, the team brings up the possibility that they might end up fighting a giant mutant metal-eating spider. Or maybe a genetically modified psychic spider goat. They promptly dub this hypothetical creature Spider Satan, while arachnophobic Michelle wishes for Brain Bleach.
• Jane creates a wand for herself and manipulates her armor in a way that resembles a Magical Girl transformation. She also creates a new version of a blood golem which is just a giant blob with a silly-looking :3 face.
• This fanart◊ of Jane giving Dr Finch a hug.
  Caius: It's just a hug, doc.
  Dr Finch: I know what it is in theory