Fanfic / My Inner Life Adaptations
Please wake up, Link...My Inner Life
is a rather legendarily bad piece of Zelda
fanfic, which you can read about in more detail over on its own page. Here, we're going to discuss the various adaptations it's had.
The manwithoutabody Dramatic Reading adds examples of:
- Accent Upon The Wrong Syllable: The Deku Tree's voice inflects wildly and arbitrarily puts emphasis on random words.
- Angrish: There is a wordless outburst of fury during the scene where Jenna gets drunk while pregnant. Seems to be a Berserk Button for him.
- Corpsing: Manwithoutabody bursts into a fit of laughter when the healer tells Jenna that having sex a lot while she's pregnant will "help make the baby stronger."
- Deadpan Snarker: After Dalamar's Scottish accent made him somewhat likable, all his dialogue (particularly any reference to Link and Jenna as his friends) is delivered in a very sarcastic tone.
- Early-Bird Cameo: "Sparkling/Abusive boyfriends? I'm not doing Midnight Sun yet..."
- Lady Mondegreen: In-Universe, we have Hugh, born of bad spelling.
- Large Ham. Also Ham and Cheese. The story isn't worth the least bit of effort, but he certainly seems to be having a good time.
- Larynx Dissonance: Particularly with Jenna and Saria.
- With Saria it seemed to be done on purpose after a while. What with Saria speaking in this really gruff Bronxy man tone.
- Milking the Giant Cow: You can't see it, but it's there.
- Mundane Made Awesome: Mundane, Beige Prose tasks, described in AN IMPROBABLY EPIC TONE OF VOICE! Hell, he even makes formatting errors sound awesome. EMBED PBRUSH!
- Special mentions when out all the other things he could emphasize he chooses to emphasize "WHILE I DID THE DISHES!"
- Running Gag:
- References to The Legend Of Zelda C Di Games.
- Every time the word "pleasure" is said, a clip of Matt Berry saying it on Snuff Box is used.
- Every time the word "water" is said, a clip of Matt Berry saying it as George the Volcano in the infamous ads for Volvic bottled water is used.
- Once Jenna discovers her elemental powers, the other three elements (Earth, Wind and Fire) get this treatment as well.
- Every time Jenna thinks about having children with Link, a clip of Bela Lugosi's "Atomic Supermen" speech from Ed Wood's Bride of the Monster is used.
- Every time the story mentions how much Link wants a son, "I'm Henry VIII, I Am" is played.
- Every time Jen says "minuet" when she clearly means "minute", the Minuet of Forest (from Ocarina of Time) starts playing.
- Whenever Link gives Jenna a gift, the Item Get! music from Ocarina of Time plays until she opens it.
- Every time the monks chant for the Bonding Ceremony, Blue Swede's "Hooked on a Feeling" starts playing.
Ooga-chakka, ooga ooga, ooga-chakka...
- Every time Jenna's head "snaps" in a direction, there's the neck-breaking clip from Creepshow.
- Due to the author's belief that the names of certain things (chiefly gemstones, but in one case seagulls) need to be capitalized, the narrator conveys this by putting a very hard emphasis on them.
- Most of the character voices are "borrowed" from other sources:
- Every character with a counterpart in the CDi games has that same voice, or at least a game effort at it. His Zelda and Impa are a bit lacking, but his "The King" is okay, and his Link is surprisingly uncanny.
- Navi has the same voice as the characters from Teen Girl Squad; this was apparently unintentional (she was just meant to be as grating as possible), but since it was pointed out to him, he seems to be playing it up more. Nabooru is based on Homestar Runner himself.
- Lilly sounds like Joan Rivers.
- The recurring "healer" character is based on Terl from Battlefield Earth, with a spot of Prof. Scudworth from Clone High.
- Rauru is Christopher Walken.
- Daurina is Barney the Dinosaur, though he also sounds very much like Tristan from Yu-Gi-Oh! The Abridged Series; the two sound alike enough that Little Kuriboh once joked Barney was voicing Tristan. "Daurina" is also a recycling of the Steven Suffern voice from Atlanta Nights.
- Aria has the voice of Terry-Thomas.
- Saria gradually becomes Doctor Girlfriend from The Venture Bros..
- Dark Link is Piderman, though he gradually comes to sound more like Homestar Runner.
- The villainous Dark Knights are the Moonenites from Aqua Teen Hunger Force. The Moonenites also showed up as a pair of convicts in Atlanta Nights.
- The griffin innkeeper is Robert Newton.
- Tanis, a griffin silk merchant, is Stewie from Family Guy. Griffin. Get it?
- The griffin elder, Alhana, sounds a little like Peter Griffin.
- The griffin guardsmen talk in Stephen Hawking-esque Robo Speak.
- One of the Hyrule Castle guards happens to be named Palin. This is, of course, milked for all it's worth.
- During the scene when Link and Jenna are cutting the wedding cake, "Still Alive" plays in the background in reference to the cake.
- Schedule Slip: Avoided where possible, but sometimes Real Life and The Pirates of Penzance intervene.
- Screw This, I'm Outta Here!: All Dalamar really wants is to be rid of Link and Jenna.
- Soundtrack Dissonance:
- CAKE's cover of "Mahna Mahna" is played over one of the worst and longest of the sex scenes.
- When Malon starts singing "Your Love Floats on the Wings of a Dove" at the wedding reception, he substitutes it for Scatman.
Worst song title ever. So I substituted something better.
- Talky Bookends: Inverted. Pieces of music are used as bookends to all the talking.
- Understatement: The fic involves Lucid Dreaming and is Left Hanging, "like Inception, but not as good."
- Violent Glaswegian: Averted, as Dalamar is portrayed as the Only Sane Man who desperately hates the other characters.
- Wild Mass Guessing: The narrator speculates that the king probably dies during the war against Ariakis and Zelda, despite being the rightful ruler, abdicates to Link and Jenna for no reason. In one version of the ending, Jenna gets speech therapy classes from Geoffrey Rush. In another, she is accosted by the screaming crone from The Princess Bride.
So, bow down to her if you want! Bow to her! Bow to the queen of terrible fanfic, the queen of filth, the queen of putrescence! Sue! Sue!
- Write Who You Know: The Deku Tree's voice is based on that of a history professor.
The MSTs provide examples of:
- Angrish: Slash falls into this a few times.
- Author Filibuster: All MST authors stop at some points to rant about how bad something is.
- The Cameo: All of the sex scenes in Zelda Queen's MST are done by different people.
- Cluster F-Bomb: Slash's MST.
- Deadpan Snarker: Ganondorf in Zelda Queen's MST.
- Heroic B.S.O.D.: Suffered by Link in Zelda Queen's MST.
- Running Gag: "THROUGH!" and "COMMA!" for Zelda Queen, "GET ON WITH IT" for Slash.
- Also the Triforce and Eye Description counts for Slash until she dumped them as an Overly Long Gag.
- Zelda Queen's "Paging the Department of Redundancy Department" count.
- Chloe and Maddi's Gannon Banned Counter, and their Queer count.
- The Pocket Dimension of Horrible Fanfiction riff has clips of actual animal sounds spliced into sex scenes and Ganondorf punching the host for bad jokes.
- Sanity Slippage: Slash suffered so much that she had to use her own characters to MST it because she couldn't do it by herself.
- Link in the Pocket Dimension riff suffers a few.
- Schedule Slip: Slash Prower and That Kid In The Basement both suffer from this.
- Screw This, I'm Outta Here!: After the chapter in which Jenna's baby is blessed, Zelda Queen eats a special brownie to put herself in a coma. She wakes up two chapters later.
- A more recent take, as done by some of the Ocarina of Time cast, has Zelda herself leave about 2/3s of the way through the disclaimer. Then the riffers have to get up and leave to fight off some Goddamned Bats.
- Troper Works: All of them.
- Viewers Are Morons: That Kid In The Basement points out that the author seems to think this, since she has to describe things that are common knowledge, like dreams.
- Wild Mass Guess: Zelda Queen theorizes that the level of character derailment in the fic is proportional to how much Ship Tease there was in the game, as well as that Link's Queen is not a native English speaker and mixed up "eyes" for something like "face".
- Or that Link's Queen has some connection to Twilight.
- The Pocket Dimension riffs host figures that the Malon and Ruto oneshot song fics have the music provided by the cows trying to form a band and a Zora barbershop quartet.