Fan Fic: Jo Bekke At Hugwrts
"MI friend edited it 4 me. You're the best, Darry!"jo Bekke At Hugwrts is a Harry Potter fanfic "written" by Jo belle/Jo bekke/Jo bel. (The author is having problems spelling her own name.) The fanfiction is about Harry's twin sister, Jo Belle Susie Lilly Potter, who learns she's a witch after she murders her uncle and then revives him by "wavd mi hnd" (waving her hand, for those who can't understand her horrid grammar and spelling). Also it's claimed that people have been commiting suicide after reading the story (probably not, but you get the idea).Even the writer of My Immortal stated that this must be the worst fanfic of all time. Well, even trolling has its standards.The fanfiction is reposted here, along with her lesser known, but just as racist and bigoted, other fics.There's another version of this fanfic here.An MST version of the fanfiction is recommend if you don't want to lose your brain cells, and a good MST would be hereCompare Da Ivy Cuvrd Wals Uv Higwsrts (the author, with whom, real Jo was friends).Compare and contrast My Immortal.
—Jo herself's author's note. (Thanks Darry. Without you, we'd have to read the unedited version.)
Jo Bekke at Hugwrts contains examples of:
- Aborted Arc: There are several.
- Author Appeal: Everything in this fic is this. Darryl even makes an appearance as a Gary Stu.
- Author Avatar: Her character shares names and viewpoints with her.
- Author Filibuster: She would go out of her way to tell everyone that gaes, blaks, amd nurtherners are dum.
- Ax-Crazy: Jo Bekke
- Back from the Dead: Jo's uncle.
- Deep South: Jo Bekke is a walking redneck stereotype, as are all the "good" characters. (In spite of most of them being British.)
- Fangirl: Hermione/Harmony is an extreme fangirl of Jo Bekke/Jo Bel"She had a jo bekke t shirt on. She wore jo belkee earings, and JO bekle stamped pantz. She Also had a ho belle arm bracelet. She also had a JO belle ring on. And her finger nales had J-O-B-E-L on each hamd. "IM UR BIGGEST fan," HARMONY SAID."
- Groin Attack: A lot of times.
- I Call Him "Mr. Happy": Darryl has a talking penis nicknamed 'Little Darryl.'
- Insane Troll Logic: We think. It's too hard to understand her.
- Kaleidoscope Eyes: Jo Bel's eyes are sometimes blue, green, or yellow. The art in the page depicts her with all three colors simultaneously.
- Out of Character: Everyone.
- Plot Hole: Too much of them to count.
- Politically Incorrect Hero
- Rape As Back Story: "Dey rap and hurt me."
- Rapunzel Hair: Jo Bel's 'durty' blond hair hangs down to her feet.
- Real Person Fic: OPRA WHIMPFREE, ELEN DEGENERIS, and MICHel DUGAr all appear in the fic.
- Rouge Angles of Satin: Holy. God. Yes. More words are spelled wrong than right.
- Self Insert: Obviously.
- Troll Fic: Yet to be confirmed. Also, she has a better fanfic here, which is possibly an indication that the fanfic this article is about is an example of Stylistic Suck.
- Troubling Unchildlike Behavior: The protagonist is eleven years old. She is a serial killer and has sex with Darryl. Also, she pole dances on top of a tractor while smoking weed,
- Random Events Plot: With the exception of a few The Stations of the Canon-moments from Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone, the plot is clearly non-existent.
- Artistic License - Biology: Darryl apparently has a talking penis.
- Artistic License - Economics: Apparently, Gringotts is a store where you can get free money. And you drive sports cars to vaults. And has a gremlin named 'Golum'.