A Song of Stars and Spirits would be a crossover between Jojos Bizarre Adventure and A Song of Ice and Fire written by Critica7. In this fanfic series, Houses Joestar and Brando would be noble Riverlands houses. Of course, with the game of thrones going on around them, things could hardly be boring.
This fic includes examples of:
- Abusive Parents:
- Dio and his wife locked their sons in a dark closet for extended periods of time whenever they displeased them, in order to teach them that they’re alone in the world and to always look out for themselves first. It bites Dio in the back when all of his sons abandon him.
- Diavolo would beat Trish when she defied him.
- Adaptational Badass:
- Rudol von Stroheim was an ordinary human prior to becoming a cyborg in canon. Here, he’s an experienced Hamon user and a Stand user after his Disney Death at Craster’s.
- Sansa gets seriously involved in the Game earlier, working as a spy with Varys.
- Joffrey, of all people, turns out to be incredibly strong with Hamon. Varys uses this to pull a Let's You and Him Fight between him and Tooru. Joffrey loses, but manages to take Tooru’s legs before dying.
- Adaptational Heroism:
- Hol Horse and Daniel D’Arby were canonically loyal to DIO. Here Holl the Horseman and Daniell D’Arby are moles for Lisa Lisa and Gerion Lannister.
- Upon learning of the coming Long Night, Joffrey immediately realizes the Others must be stopped and agrees to help, even if he is imagining himself being known as “Joffrey Baratheon, Hero of Dawn.” Also, he didn’t order Eddard Stark killed; Renly did.
- Santana is a straight-up hero here, fighting against the other Others.
- Adaptational Intelligence: Joffrey, as a result of being fostered at Casterly Rock. Despite his core personality being similar, he’s not The Caligula the way he is in canon, and while he still has his share of failures, they at least have some logic behind them beyond “I am the king!”
- Adaptational Jerkass: Esidisi was an honorable warrior in canon. Here, he still insists on fighting fair, but only because it’s more exciting that way.
- Adaptational Villainy:
- Renly proves to be a Bitch in Sheep's Clothing who cares more about being respected than the good of the realm.
- Craster somehow manages to be even worse than canon. Upon meeting Straizo, he makes a plan with him to lure members of the Watch to his home and then let the others kill them. He doesn’t care that his “wives” will be killed as well, reasoning that he can always get new ones once he’s an Other.
- Kars’s few canon redeeming qualities go out the window. He’s plotting to kill all life on the planet save for the Others and Rock Humans, and when Wammu objects, Kars tries to kill him without a second thought.
- Adaptational Wimp: Nobody has Stands until later, when the secret of unlocking them is uncovered.
- Adaptation Name Change:
- Noriaki Kakyoin->Norris Cayowen.
- Vanilla Ice->Vann Snow.
- Okuyasu Nijimura->Oakley Nemura.
- Koichi Hirose->Koch Highrose.
- Sadao Kujo->Saldor Cujoh.
- Tomoko Higashikata->Toma, daughter of Ray.
- Ryohei Higashikata->Ray Rivers.
- Yoshikage Kira->Joshia Kyra. Both Kiras in fact; Joshia II is Kira from Part 4, and Joshia III is Kira from Part 8.
- Shinobu Kawajiri->Sheena Kyra.
- Hayato Kawajiri->Halt Kyra.
- Narsisco Anasui->Anakiss Bolton.
- Funny Valentine->Fenn Valentin.
- Tamaki Damo->Tamm Damo.
- Adaptation Personality Change: While many of his mannerisms are the same, rather than a Serial Killer who tries to keep his identity secret, Joshia Kyra II is a Hanging Judge and eventual traitor.
- Adaptation Relationship Overhaul: The fic’s version of Enrico Pucci never even meets Dio Brando, instead being the leader of the Faith Militant.
- Alas, Poor Villain: Joffrey is still far from a good person, but upon realizing Tooru is the Others’ spy, he tries to stop him without thinking about the consequences. He does manage to get Tooru’s legs by using the carpet, but Tooru cuts them off before Joffrey’s Hamon can spread, and has Wonder of U take the form of the king. Joffrey dies believing he failed. He never finds out that he got the last laugh after all; see Batman Gambit below.
- Ancestral Weapon: House Joestar actually has a gallery of the weapons used by each member.
- Anyone Can Die: Well, duh. It’s Westeros, after all.
- Armor-Piercing Response:
- Cersei: You mean to tell me that my son was killed months ago, and replaced by a magic duplicate, and despite knowing about this, you didn’t say anything?
- Varys: Would you have believed me?
- Arranged Marriage:
- Renly and Maergery Tyrell. It doesn’t last; upon Renly cutting a deal with the Ironborn, the Tyrells get paranoid and back out.
- “Joffrey” and Maergery. Never happens. When Olenna is poisoned at the wedding, Mace calls it off; and weds Maergery to Aegon Targaryen. This one sticks, until Aegon is killed by Rhaegal. She marries Samwell Tarly in the epilogue; this one is not an Arranged Marriage.
- Myrcella Baratheon and Trystane Martell. This one sticks.
- Giorno Brando and Trish Una. Perfectly Arranged Marriage.
- Robb Stark and Roslin Frey. Again, Perfectly Arranged Marriage.
- Asshole Victim: Plenty.
- Viserys, as par canon.
- Straizo kills Craster once he’s no longer useful out of disgust that he’d let the Others kill his “family.” He states that he wanted to do so for a long time, but the Night Queen wouldn’t let him because she was using his sons for her experiments, and no more sons are coming.
- Cioccolata and Secco are framed by Risotto Nero for his spying. Common sentiment is that being Flayed Alive was too good for them.
- Karl Tanner is one of the Watchmen killed at Craster’s. Considering that he had spent the entire fic belittling others and had recently killed a wilding child for refusing to give him directions, it’s hard to feel sorry for him even if you don’t already know what he’s like from the TV show.
- Joffrey tortures Littlefinger to death after Tyrion finds evidence of stolen funds. While many people are horrified by Baelish’s gristly fate, few are able to honestly say he didn’t deserve it.
- Lysa Arryn. She and Baelish were the ones who started the War of the Five Kings, after all. Unfortunately, when she gets killed by a shadow-baby, it only serves to make the war worse.
- Roland Carn is the third-most Ax-Crazy of the Una bannermen. If anyone deserved to be burned alive by Melisandre, it was him.
- Ser Jey Geil is one of House Brando’s most vicious attack dogs, and has a reputation capable of rivaling the Bloody Mummers. When Balon Swann sticks a sword through his neck, nobody is sorry to hear about it, aside from his mother.
- Vargo Hoat and many of the other members of the Brave Companions meet their fate at the hands of Ser Bluemarine, the Hurricane. Nobody mourns them. Rorge gets away with some of the survivors, but gets killed later by Brienne.
- While razing the Riverlands, the Mountain gets killed by Jotaro and Polnareff. The only ones sorry to hear it are Oberyn Martell and Sandor Clegane, and only because they each wanted to be the ones to kill him.
- The Mountain’s Men, along with Amory Lorch, are among those killed in the Stand attack on Harrenhal.
- After Joshia Kyra II betrays Jonathon Joestar the Younger (Johnny) to the Tyrells, Joshia III poisons him and frames a lecherous court page who tried to cut out one of his peer’s eyes for “ignoring” him. Both deaths are quite satisfying.
- Tanton Fossoway is one of the first nobles killed by Oyecomova. His death is met with cheers by the smallfolk he frequently brutalized.
- Renly ends up lasting longer than in canon as a result of Jon Joestar and Diego Brando destroying the Stormlands’ confidence in him and thus being less of a threat to Stannis. But his luck runs out, and he gets butchered by the Freys.
- Griffith. While wildfire is a painful way for anyone to die, Griffith had been one of the worst even by the standards of the Others, and nobody is sorry when Guts gets his revenge upon the mass-murdering rapist.
- Randyll Tarly is killed by a scribe in Ramsay and Damo’s pocket. Damo notes the death was ironic, considering his hatred of them. In any case, after sending his son to the Wall for reading, he gets no sympathy.
- It’s hard to say that anyone deserves to fall into the hands of Euron Greyjoy. But if anyone did, it was probably Diavolo Una.
- Ramsay Snow leaves more than a few innocents Flayed Alive or otherwise tortured to death, Jeyne Westerling being perhaps the most notable. But in the end, trueborn Boltons do it better, as Anakiss shows him. Considering Ramsay’s crimes, even Stannis pardons Anakiss.
- Tooru uses Wonder of U to impersonate Joffrey, and creates a reign of terror worse than the real Joffrey ever did. But in the end, he gets done in by a simple stonecutter who didn’t realize the rock he carved into bricks was actually a person.
- Varys may have opposed the Long Night, but he was still a very bad man. No one mourned his death at the hands of Oyecomova.
- Oyecomova worshipped the Others and did everything possible to destabilize the realm to give them an easy target. Daenerys didn’t know that, but she did know he had killed Quaithe, and Oyecomova dies in dragon fire.
- Euron Greyjoy and the Night Queen end up being the ones to kill each other. And the world is a better place without them.
- Dany and Cersei both end up being killed by Pucci as their conflict in King’s Landing kills more and more people. And it was a LONG time coming.
- Dio follows in the footsteps of Griffith, and betrays humanity to the Others. But humanity wins in the end, as Jotaro crushes his skull.
- Jon and Santana finally get revenge for both their peoples in the end, and Night King Kars’s reign draws to a close.
- For all of Pucci’s moral grandstanding, he’s no more righteous than Cersei or Dany. And he ends up being killed by the dying Hurricane, neither of them ever knowing they were brothers.
- Awesome, but Impractical: Ramsay’s Stand, Don’t Fear the Reaper. It can’t be damaged, nor can its target run or hide from it. But it takes 66 seconds to kill, and it can’t defend Ramsay, so he’s dependent on his men to protect him while he uses it.
- Bait-and-Switch: At the Hand’s Tourney, when several knights are attempting to restrain the Mountain from trying to kill Loras, the ten-year-old Jolene tells him to stand down, “or I’ll kill you where you stand.” It looks like the Mountain is going to attack her...until he bursts out laughing.
- Batman Gambit: Varys knows Joffrey has been replaced by Wonder of U, but he also knows that he can’t try to attack the Stand. Upon figuring out that Tooru, who is in hiding, has turned himself into stone to avoid being found, what does Varys do? Why, offer to redraw the city’s street plan! Varys gambles that Tooru will be too busy running Westeros into the ground to realize just how many stone bricks the project will take. Sure enough, Tooru’s body gets turned into bricks by a stonecutter.
- Big Good: Elysabeth Joestar and Gerion Lannister, as the heads of a conspiracy dedicated to stopping the Long Night.
- Birds of a Feather: Bronn and Sandor get along rather well, both being hired swords with no illusions that they’re anything more than that. When Tywin gives the Mountain’s property and position to Bronn, Sandor congratulates him.
- Bunny-Ears Lawyer: Tywin knows Wekapipo is a spy with his own agenda, and Wekapipo knows Tywin knows. But Tywin doesn’t do anything to him because Wekapipo is very efficient at killing, and Tywin needs that skill, especially with the Mountain dead. So instead he simply spies on Wekapipo and ensures that he doesn’t do anything more detrimental to the Lannisters than he’s worth.
- Cassandra Truth: Joffrey just cannot get anyone to believe that anything was not his fault. When Janos Slynt murders Eddard Stark on Renly’s orders, the North believes Slynt is just Joffrey’s scapegoat (to be fair, he did order Ned thrown in the Black Cells). When Joffrey accuses Lysa Arryn of murdering her husband, nobody believes him. When he accuses Stannis of sending the assassin who killed Lysa, the Vale believes he’s lying to try to gain their loyalty after having their Lady Paramount murdered.
- Cerebus Retcon: Aerys wasn’t mad at all. He actually gained a Stand when one of his relatives died in a fire, and he learned about the Others through it. The burning throughout his reign was his effort to recreate what happened and arm his people with Stands.
- Challenging the Chief: A non-battle example. Tyrion beats Littlefinger in his game of spies and uncovers several damning records of Littlefinger’s theft of funds and other unscrupulous activities. Joffrey makes Tyrion his new Master of Coin on the spot.
- Composite Character:
- Kars is the Night King.
- Enrico Pucci takes the role of the High Sparrow.
- Decomposite Character: Dio Brando. Dio is the name of both the house’s founder and its current heir; the Dio who fought Jonathan is long dead, but the current Dio fights Jotaro.
- Defiant to the End:
- Alastair Thorne. Even when all of the men with him are dead, Thorne keeps fighting the wights, and even tries to fight Kars himself. Kars himself notes that his fighting spirit is admirable.
- Tywin, so much so that he manages to pull a Taking You with Me on Drogon.
- The Dreaded:
- Ser Bluemarine, the Hurricane. Even more so once he gains his Stand.
- Nobody wants to take on Sam Tarly in a Stand battle. Nobody.
- Everyone Has Standards: Gerion and Lysa Lysa both despise Varys, but they put up with him because they need him.
- Family Theme Naming: Discussed. House Joestar has a superstition that they will be blessed with vast strength and fortitude, but only if their men have names that start with “Jo”. Some people laugh at the superstition, but the fact remains that Nikolos Joestar is the only Joestar man since before Jonathan I who died without ever seeing battle.
- For Want Of A Nail:
- Because Roose Bolton has two living sons, he never bothers even finding out if Ramsay exists or not. Never reaching the Dreadfort, Ramsay instead creates a gang of bandits and hired thugs. He ends up killing Jeyne Westerling before Robb could meet her, and Robb marries Roslin Frey instead. As a result, the Red Wedding never happens.
- Because “Joffrey” at the Purple Wedding is actually Wonder of U, it’s not him who dies of the Strangler, but Olenna Tyrell. Mace refuses to go through with the wedding after that, and instead backs Stannis, then Aegon Targaryen.
- The battle against Straizo at Craster’s causes the mutiny at the Watch to be averted, as the Watchmen realize they have bigger problems than Jon’s unorthodox leadership.
- Pycelle’s poisoning of King Robert is exposed by Baelish when Pycelle finds out about his theft, and he is painted as a Targaryen loyalist as this was after the Great Council meeting arguing over whether to assassinate Danaerys. Pycelle is executed, and a new Grand Maester is sent by the citadel: Satoru Akefu, son of Yi-Tish immigrants. Along with his good-nephew, Tooru. Tooru is a Rock Human agent for the Others, and Akefu is his Stand.
- Generation Xerox:
- Joffrey, having been fostered at Casterly Rock, takes after Tywin in many regards (greed, desire to be respected, focus on what history will think of him, Complexity Addiction, etc.).
- Anakiss Bolton is his father’s son; he may be loyal, unlike Roose, but he shares his father’s penchant for Body Horror. Though unlike his father, he is a Combat Medic; some soldiers comment that it’s disturbing how he can save a man’s life and then rip apart a corpse to see how it works not ten minutes later. Anakiss simply claims that it’s because he takes corpses apart that he can save lives. And while most of the bodies he takes apart are dead, some aren’t.
- Handicapped Badass: Jon Joestar only has one leg. That doesn’t stop him from fighting; he’s the best horse archer in Westeros.
- Human Sacrifice: One ingredient needed to awaken a Stand, along with fire and a connection to magic. At first only someone with magic in their blood will do, like a Targaryen or a Blackfyre, but the Red Priests end up finding ways to perform the ritual using anyone.
- In Spite of a Nail:
- Domeric Bolton still seeks Ramsay out, and Ramsay still kills him. Only this time, it’s because Ramsay was a thorn in the North’s side, and Domeric didn’t know Ramsay was his half-brother.
- Arya still ends up serving as Tyson’s cupbearer at Harrenhal. Only she’s spying for the Council with Wekapipo this time.
- Logical Weakness: Wonder of U is triggered by intent to pursue it or its user. But you don’t pursue a stone; the stonecutter who turns Tooru into bricks doesn’t realize the stone he’s cutting is a person, and so there’s no intent to pursue to trigger the Stand.
- The Mole: For the Council, Varys, Wekapipo, Stroheim, Syrio, Jon Connington, Holl the Horseman, Daniell D’Arby, Rodrik Harlaw, Rohan, Barristan Selmy, and later Arya, Gendry, Sansa, Bronn, and many more. According to Gerion, We Are Everywhere.
- Moral Event Horizon: In-universe. Daenerys builds up plenty of support in her bid for the Iron Throne...right up until she torches Aegon for having a better claim. Much of the support base Aegon had built for the Targaryen Restoration erodes after that, and Valentin withdraws his support as well. Dany loses the rest when she butchers the Tyrells (sans Maergery, who was absent) during a negotiation, violating Sacred Hospitality, because Mace wanted her to marry one of his sons as compensation for Aragon’s death, and threatened to withdraw his support.
- Nice Job Breaking It, Hero: The Council’s methods leave quite a bit to be desired. Rather than focusing on unifying political leaders to present a united front against the Others, they focus on trying to recruit people who are individually powerful (magic users, potentially strong Hamon users, Stand users, etc.) They do have the Golden Company until it gets torched by Dany and several other sources of soldiers, but they’re shorthanded in terms of manpower. Tyrion points out to Gerion that it would have been far less wasteful to recruit as many people as possible and train them in powers capable of dealing with Others.
- Not His Sled: In the show, and possibly the books as well, Aegon Targaryen is a fake. In the fic, though, he is exactly who he says he is.
- Not-So-Well-Intentioned Extremist: Oyecomova leads a revolution of the smallfolk under the pretense of creating a society without nobles. In reality, he hopes to weaken Westeros enough for the Others to invade virtually unopposed.
- Related in the Adaptation:
- Jon Joestar is Joseph Joestar’s nephew.
- Diego Brando is DIO’s father.
- Anakiss is Roose Bolton’s son.
- Dio’s wife is a Frey, so his sons are related to the Freys.
- Diego’s wife was a Joestar, so Dio is technically related to House Joestar, but nobody considers him part of it. Least of all Dio.
- Vannel Snow is the bastard son of a Blackfyre.
- In the past, Tarkus was a Clegane.
- Sanity Slippage: Dany, after falling for Axl RO's Thanatos Gambit.
- Screw the Rules, I Have Supernatural Powers! & Screw the Rules, I Make Them!: Dany's justification for killing Aegon. Aegon's backers are not happy.
- So Last Season: Dragons were nearly unstoppable, once. But with the advent of Stands, they’re reduced to a respectable but defeatable weapon. By the time Daenerys reaches King’s Landing, all three of them have been killed by Stand users.
- Spared by the Adaptation: With no Red Wedding, Robb isn't murdered by the Freys. But he does eventually get killed by Oyecomova in Book 6.
- Stations of the Canon: For the JoJo side of things, a few.
- The original Jonathan Joestar and the original Dio Brando were still bitter enemies and killed each other.
- Polnareff’s sister was still raped and murdered. Only by the Mountain rather than Jey Geil.
- Wess Bluemarine was still stolen from the Puccis as a baby, and was the victim of an attempted lynching.
- Too Dumb to Live:
- Despite generally being slightly more reasonable than Canon Joffrey, Joffrey still orders a bard’s tongue cut out for singing a song mocking the Lannisters to him. Only this time, instead of being outraged at being mocked, Joffrey does it because “someone that stupid doesn’t deserve to be able to speak.”
- Mace, do you really think trying to force a deal out of someone as unstable as Dany has become will work?
- Underestimating Badassery: After Tywin replaces the dead Mountain with Bronn, many opposing commanders assume he’ll be easy to deal with compared to the Mountain. Nope! Bronn is a deadly fighter and a much more effective commander than Gregor Clegane, and he quickly builds a reputation of his own.
- “Well Done, Grandson!” Guy: Joffrey arguably has it even worse than in canon in this regard. Especially as he wants the approval of Tywin, rather than Robert.
- Wham Episode: Chapter 27 of Book 1. After all of the previous chapters have given no indication that Stands exist in the story, Stannis gains one.
