Reviews FanFic / Dashs New Mom

Interesting character study buried beneath contrived conflict and muddled metaphor

What might seem like a sitcom premise is, admirably, used to provide an in-depth look at the psyche of the fastest pony in Equestria and those around her. Unfortunately, the authors seem unable to make up their minds precisely how to get the results of that look across. After Dash's initial shock at the new relationship in her life, the story enters a holding pattern for over 30K words while Dash (among others) alternates between grumbling and being thrown into a subplot which is apparently meant to hold a mirror to her own situation but only makes things less clear, as it appears lessons are being learned and promptly forgotten by everypony involved. Characters move from earnest dialogue into earnest monologues which make it clear not only what their faults are but that they recognize them, yet these lessons are promptly forgotten in favor of more conflict- until the last couple of chapters, when they decide to stick, though not without a Third Act Misunderstanding which anyone who has seen a "romantic" "comedy" will see coming a mile off. Simultaneously, the aforementioned subplot balloons, then it pops and is left limp save for an epilogue which somehow works neither as resolution nor as Sequel Hook.

In short, anyone who ever wanted to see Rainbow Dash as the protagonist of a soap opera, this is your game. Anyone else will need to make up his or her own mind as to whether the (limited) description of an unusual (but plausible) pairing is worth the attendant baggage, to the point where, for two thirds of the story, the accompanying comments and debate are just as engrossing as the actual chapters.