All Purpose Negima Fanfiction Thread

The quarian's intel was good, Koort had to admit. The Shadow Broker's five-agent cell in the area had chosen well in terms of apartments; this was a dingy run-down piece of shit that didn't stand out at all in this poorer borough of the Citadel Wards. They'd added a few unobtrusive additional security measures, but all in all there was no way to tell this hole was one of the Broker's launching bases. They'd even kept the crappy entrance door with a small horizontal slit so that a guest could see who was knocking. Since Chi'Zame had already subtly disabled the other security countermeasures, there was nothing left to do but go in. With a tiny grin on his face, Ingam Koort accessed the protocols the quarian had left on his omnitool and used a remote spike to ring their doorbell from a few yards away.

Then the young krogan drew his shotgun, lowered his black-plated head, and charged.

Right before impact Koort caught the door with a negative mass effect field that would weaken its structural integrity at the molecular level, as well as reduce its mass relative to him by a factor of twenty. It wasn't absolutely necessary on the low-quality construction of these apartments; that door hadn't been replaced or seriously maintained since 2102, and there were prey species krogan on Tuchanka hunted with their bare hands that had tougher hides. But Koort didn't want to waste time breaking it down; he valued the tactical advantage of surprise.

The first agent Koort encountered was the batarian who answered the door. Koort would never have the chance to see what his face looked like before rearranging it. The batarian was confident there wouldn't be trouble, not with his three of his compatriots covering the door, and went to look through the slit. The only warning he got was the door suddenly glowing blue a moment before over eight hundred kilos of young krogan came barreling through it. The poor door was cracked clean out of its frame, and Koort followed through on his momentum to slam door and batarian into the wall across from the entry hallway. He could feel bones break and armour yield under the force of his charge. Number One down. His peripheral vision registered two on his right and one on his left; he threw the door aside to his left in order to buy a few second's cover, and darted in the opposite direction.

Number Two was the closest Broker agent on his right, a salarian. It had just started recognizing the threat and was raising a pistol. Koort didn't even bother shooting Number Two. He was turning in that direction anyways; easier to swing his shotgun out and backhand the salarian across the face with it. The force of the blow lifted Number Two off his feet and bounced him off the wall head-first. Both of the impact sounds were squishy; as he strode forward to deal with Number Three, he noticed the salarian fall limply to the floor, and part of his mind remembered someone telling him how salarian skeletons were more cartilage than bone.

A fizzing sound and a tinge of blue told Koort that Numbers Three and Four had activated shields. It didn't bother him; his two favourite ways to deal with shields were infighting and a shotgun at close quarters, both of which were available to him. Number Three was a human, and he had a shotgun of his own. But by the time he could get it raised, Koort had leapt within arm's reached and hooked his own arm under the human's right elbow, yanking it up into a nasty joint lock. The human yelped in pain as his shoulder was nearly yanked out of his socket, rising to his toes. The yelp was cut off as Koort whipped forward into a headbutt that reduced Number Three's nose to so much smear on his head crest. He turned around quickly to get a look at Number Four. That agent was another human, and he had just gotten over his surprise and was pushing the twisted wreck of the front door out of the way. Koort took one step in that direction, turned his hips, and threw a stunned Number Three at Number Four's legs like a humanoid discus. Number Four nearly got his feet taken out from under him, and the two seconds he took to regain his balance were enough for Koort to close the distance between them.

The young krogan stepped out to Number Four's left flank and grabbed the human's pistol arm by the wrist. First, one yank straight down, to pull him off balance. Then one yank to Koort's left, and the krogan slammed the human into the corridor wall with force enough to empty the human's lungs. As Number Four gasped for breath and tried to fruitlessly break Koort's grip on his arm, the young krogan stepped in close, pushing the human back and spinning him around. It was easy enough to jam Number Four's arm up between his shoulder blades in a basic police hold. Which was good, as Number Five had just come around the corner with an SMG in his hands.

Rather than backing away, Koort crouched behind his human shield and advanced forward. Number Five, a turian, hesitated for a second; a fatal mistake. Krogan are big targets, but most of that target is heavily armoured. The turian took a moment to try lining up a burst, in which time Koort calmly laid his shotgun on Number Four's shoulder and blew Number Five's head off. Whatever they had equipped for shields, it wasn't enough to stop an M-22 Eviscerator blast at under two metres.

Five opponents in under ten seconds, thought Koort. Let's see Shepard beat that.

Koort dragged Number Four to the wall and slammed the human up to hold him still. Enemy check. Number One was gurgling out his last on the floor. Number Two was facedown a short distance from him, not moving. Number Four he had in a pin, and Number Five was spread over most of the next room. He had a moment of concern over Number Three until he realized that he was actually stepping on that human's neck. Oops. Well, that answers the question of whether or not he'll be fighting again.

"So," Koort chuckled amiably to Number Four. "Now that we know each other better, let's talk business. I gotta few questions."

Number Four spat blood from a loosened tooth. "Go to hell."

Koort just grinned more. "Who's sending me there? You?"

There was a loud shot and Koort felt something soft bounce off of his forehead crest. Sure enough, down the hall was Number Six popping the thermal clip out of a rifle. Koort quickly spun to put Number Four between him and the new assailant and snapped off a quick shot. No good; this target was too far out of range, and behind cover with shields up besides. "The fuck?" grunted Koort. "There was supposed ta be five of you."

"Give it up, krogan," growled Number Six, another human. "This is a Mantis. I've seen it take krogans through the forehead before, and your barrier's down."

"Take the shot!" hissed Number Four. Koort yanked his arm up again to make him yelp. This was a dilemma. Number Six was a good distance away. In the time it would take for his kinetic barrier to reestablish, this newcomer could easily get another shot or two off. The young krogan held his own weapon up with a thoughtful expression; it seemed less like he was holding his fire and more like he was contemplating something. Then his grin returned.

"Eh, whatever. I guess she deserves a little fun of her own too."

Number Six raised an eyebrow at the krogan's puzzling remark and lined up his shot.

Then a feminine form dropped out from above him and landed on his rifle. His finger brushed the trigger just before her weight tore it from his grip, but the shot wasted itself into the floor. He got a glimpse of a black catsuit and a green scaled head before she drove her left elbow into his solar plexus. The ambusher's right elbow spun around in a followup strike to Number Six's temple. The dazed human tried to get his hands on this new attacker when she disappeared from view. What Koort and Number Five could see was that the attacker was a female drell, and that she had dropped into a crouch under Six's field of vision.

Of the martial arts drell assassins learn under their Compact with the Hanar, the move she performed next was one of the few that could be traced to the fighting styles of the now-dead drell homeward. The marine forces of the Human Systems Alliance taught a similar move in their CQC courses. From her crouch, she wrapped both her legs around Number Six's right leg and rolled forward over her left shoulder. The roll itself was a comfortable maneuver for her. Not so much for her passenger, who had the full weight of an adult drell levering him forward with a fulcrum under his centre of mass.

Even Koort had to wince as she slammed him face first into the floor with a thundering crash.

The drell came out of the roll in a flowing movement that brought her kneeling beside her victim, and she placed a pistol no one had seen her draw against the human's head. Koort's grin reached shit-eating proportions. He loved watching that girl work. It was beautiful. The best part was feeling Number Four deflate in surprise when he realized his rescue was downed.

"Where the fuck did she come from?"

"Yeah, big sis gets that a lot." Koort slammed Number Four back onto the wall and returned his shotgun to interrogation position. "You guys are lucky I caught you first."

Kaede looked up from patting down Number Six; he didn't have any other weapons, and even if he did the poor bastard was too stunned to use them. She gave Koort a knowing smile, complete with her perpetual wink.

"Actually, young one," she purred, "I had been waiting in here for you since, oh, about an hour ago."

"Sh-shut up!"

—-

From the Files of the Illusive Woman

• Ingam Koort
• Age: 10 galactic standard years
• Species: Krogan
• Rank: Cadet, formerly civilian with criminal background (note: like most krogan Koort has seen extensive combat experience from a young age, despite lack of formal rank)
• Background: The child of an Ingam male and an Okeer female, Koort was not easily accepted in Clan Ingam and would leave them at a young age to try earning his fortune alone. He had an impressive mercenary career behind him by the time Shepard and his class encountered Koort during the Neo Kyoto incident. Koort had been hired by Chigusa as muscle for her operation (as well as given a biotic implant) and was incarcerated shortly after Shepard's allies defused the situation. He was released as a result of the Shadow Broker's actions when the Broker tried to infiltrate the Academy and confront Shepard and Kagurazaka. Due to his attempts to help Shepard during this crisis, Koort was granted an early release due to good behaviour, which is saying something for a krogan. Principal Konoe personally rewarded him with an admissions test and a scholarship application, and soon Koort became the Academy's first krogan admission. As well as being the only krogan in the school, Koort is also the youngest non-salarian student, although this is expected given the rapid maturation rate of his species.
• Personality: Ingam Koort is particularly proud of his jet-black forehead crest and his biotic abilities, both of which are rarities among the krogan. His grades are slightly below average and he is generally uncouth and impolite in appearance, but tests of his tactical abilities indicate Koort is much smarter than he lets on. Like most of his species he has a strong appetite for combat and little fear of death. Koort is highly competitive and is drawn to individuals against whom he feels like testing his skills. This seems to be the foundation of his relationship with Shepard, which is a friendship despite the young krogan's insistence to the contrary; in one amusing incident Koort accidentally called Shepard "battlemaster" as a slip of the tongue and spent the rest of the week vehemently denying that he thought of Shepard as such. Aside from Shepard, he is on good terms with several of Shepard's students. He shows particular respect for Kaede Nagass, who impressed him with her combat abilities when she incapacitated him on Neo Kyoto.

• Kaede Nagass
• Age: 16 Galactic standard years (disputable)
• Species: Drell
• Rank: Cadet (rank under her hanar masters was Senior Disciple at the time she left Kahje)
• Background: Kaede trained under the hanar as a Compact assassin for years before her sponsors, pleased with her progress, sent her to the Academy as a representative for their family (a situation typical for the Academy's drell students). This is a well guarded secret our sources needed to do some serious digging to uncover; while we suspect Alliance intel to still be in the dark regarding the true nature of her pre-Academy training, the Broker's informants and the Special Task Group's contacts at the Academy seem to be aware of Nagass' capabilities. That's all we can tell about her for now; the hanar keep a tight lid on their training program and the Nagass family is no exception. Like most of the drell trained for combat as part of the Compact, Kaede possesses biotic abilities.
• Personality: Kaede acts extremely mature for her age. She speaks rarely and has the habit of winking in conversation often. As demonstrated in the Neo Kyoto incident, she shows exceptional judgment in combat situations. Generally standoffish, she does not socialize with many members of her class besides the twins. Holds a mild rivalry with Mana Tatsumian. It should be noted that she follows the old drell religion, which is uncommon for drell her age.

"May I come in, Negi-san?" the female Averruncus said.

Her voice was silky and beautiful, and flowed like pristine cold water, yet always with a slightly inhuman edge to it. Her intelligent, gray eyes were full with a subdued vitality; many of his students said they were a snake's eyes. Like all her brethren, she was impressively fast, managing to sneak past him and into the room, closing the door after herself, before he could utter a 'No'.

Her steps were firm, yet also quiet and silent. There seemed to be just the slightest calculated sensual pace to her walking, as her hips shifted around discreetly with each step.

"What... What has brought you here, Sextum-san?" Negi attempted to smile, feeling a sharp ill feeling in his gut. Even after the defeat of Kosmo Entelecheia, even after its members had reached an uneasy co existence with Ala Alba and their allies, the old spark of old enemities always lurked under the surface.

She paused, stopping before the balcony, thoughtfully putting a hand on its frame, looking outside at the cold Vespertarian night. Nodoka and Yue edged away a few inches apart from her, keeping their breaths low, attempting their best to stay unnoticed. Finally, much to their momentary relief, Sextum turned around and said, "Negi-san, I still have much to learn about you."

"About me?" he cluelessly repeated.

"About you all. Human beings," she coolly spoke. "You are full of foolishness, and yet your lives... seem to have more purpose than ours. Master Dynamis has tried to give me some answers, but I believe his judgement on it, accurate as it may be in some parts, is... flawed in the whole."

"Well, Dynamis-san..." Negi pondered how to say it, "... has his own perspective on life. You can't get answers on the meaning of life from asking a single source, even the wisest one. It's a life long quest, and every day yields us some new results."

Sextum nodded, shifting her head a bit aside. For a moment, Negi wondered if he had just seen a pale shade of pink flushing over her cheeks at the moonlight. "I thought you might say something like that. You always have said there isn't a single path, haven't you? Even back then, when we stuck to our way without looking past it, you always looked for alternatives..."

"Maybe I should have listened to your points a bit better, as well," he confessed.

She looked back at it. "Negi-san, what is love?"

"Pardon me?" he blinked.

"The Master says it's something I must learn by myself. Brother Tertium will not even talk about it, and my other brothers have no use for it. But Brother Tertium's followers say it's something a woman must pursue with the man she's the closest to."

Negi tried not to cringe in fear. "I am... Am I... The closest man to you?"

She nodded. "Other than the members of my family, if you can call them that, yes. You have been there for us even when your companions wished for nothing but our banishment. And I understand this is a very special occasion for you. If I do something that pleases you, would you teach me more about life and love in trade?"

"I am not... that kind of teacher," he helplessly eeped. "Are you telling me you still haven't learned the basics on what's human love after all these years?"

"Like you said, we learn about it every day. And, have you actually learned all there is to learn about it?" she challenged.

Now that stunned him. "... No, I guess not, but..."

"Let's learn together, then," she whispered. Before he could even think of stopping her, she undid her robe's belt, allowing it to flutter down to the door. She had been wearing nothing underneath.

The first time Negi had seen her naked, at the battlefield, she hadn't even thought twice about it.

Now it was a fully different story.

"S-S-Sex-Sextum-san!!" he tried to avert his eyes as she stepped out of her slippers, being in a flash right before him, lightly teasing his chest with her fingers. "N-N-No, no, don't do that...!"

At that moment, everyone still hiding was about to spring up ready to do battle, even Natsumi... except for Kotarou, peacefully snoring crouched down at a corner of the shower stall. However, before an epic battle could break out, everyone was frozen down again by yet another knock at the door.

"Oh," Sextum's eyes blinked twice. "It would seem we will continue this conversation later."

She quickly, yet elegantly, stepped into the tiny kitchen of Negi's mini apartment, opening the icebox and hiding into it, shutting the door close after herself.

Negi gave the icebox a dubious look. "Sextum-san? Are you sure you'll be okay there?"

"I'm in my element," her voice replied. "Now go. I can last for hours and hours in here."

"Okay, if you say so..." he sighed, then went to attend the door.

This time, he found himself face to face with Zazie Rainyday.

".......!!!!!" he said.

"........" Zazie greeted back, in pajamas and rubbing her sleepy eyes off. Then she peered into the room, looking in all directions for a few seemingly eternal moments before staring at Negi's eyes and simply whispering,

"Sorry. Wrong room."

And without a single more word, she headed down the hall, soon disappearing from sight.

Negi slammed the door shut and breathed deeply. "THANK YOU, GOD!!"

Then he noticed Kaede was somehow standing right before him. "GAHHH! Kaede-san?-!-? How did you?-! When did you?-!"

She just smiled and shook a finger around. "Nin-Nin!"

"... Oh. Of course. Wait, how long have you—"

"Just arrived, Negi-bouzou!" her smile grew even bigger. "Don't you wonder where's Zazie heading, too?"

"Not really," he confessed.

"What's wrong with you? You look very spent, de gozaru."

"It's been a... stressing night," he said. "I think I need some serious rest..."

"What if we take a bath?"

"We?"

"Like that time at the hills..."

"I was only a child then!"

"That's exactly the point," the tall woman smirked mischievously. "You'll see, Negi-bouzou, I... ah..." Her voice trailed off, and she chuckled awkwardly, scratching the back of her neck. "This is new to me. I'm not used to have problems saying what I want to say..."

"I envy you," he deflated.

As the girls around them bickered and shouted to each other, Yue and Nodoka noticed Haruna was oddly quiet and yet nervous. She squirmed uneasily in place, trying to avoid eye contact with 2-F. Even the two hair antennae on the top of her head were hanging unusually down.

"Haruna, are you feeling ill or something?" Yue asked her.

"Eh?" the mangaka looked at her. "Why should I?"

"You haven't made a single sarcastic comment since this started," Nodoka pointed out.

"Yeah, and you haven't sexually harassed any of the sempais," the other librarian added.

Haruna chuckled rather falsely. "C'mon, girls! Surely you can't have such a low concept of me...!"

"Yes, we do," Yue and Nodoka chorused.

"There's nothing wrong with me, for real!" the black haired beauty protested. "It's just I don't think this match is such a hot idea!"

Even the rest of 2-A paused and took notice.

"Are you passing on a chance to have a pointless, childish match against someone else?" Mana asked her.

"And to see girls in sport shorts?" Chizuru questioned.

"And to get reference for your sports manga?" Kazumi completed.

The artist looked, for once, just begging for everyone to draw attention away from her. "W-Well, now you put it that way, never mind... It's just..."

"Are you afraid of taking on a challenge, Paru-chan?" a confident voice called from the ranks of 2-F.

Haruna shuddered as the curvy, smiling figure of another girl with black hair and glasses strode ahead. Her hair was shorter than hers, and her eyes were sharper and less rounded, with an unique controlled foxiness to them compared to Haruna's habitual rampant exhuberance.

The girl smirked knowingly. "That's very unlike you, Paru-chan. Disappointing, too. What happened to that old Saotome spirit you always boast around so much? Your Dad would be let down, don't you think?"

Haruna sweated bucketloads now, biting her lower lip. "Like Hell I'm worried, Fujiyoshi-sempai, but..."

"Fujiyoshi?" Ako jolted up in place. "Like in 'Fujiyoshi Harumi'?"

"The Ace of All Sports?" Natsumi grew concerned. "The girl who rejected memberships from all sports clubs... just because they bored her?"

"She once swam laps with our club, and none of us could catch up to her," Akira's voice mildly cracked.

"Coach Fujisawa tried to recruit her for our track team. She's a freakin' beast!" Misora bit her fingernails. "I don't want to ever be at the opposite side of a court versus that woman!"

"She scares Haruna!" Fumika hugged Fuuka.

"She can't be human!" Fuuka hugged her twin back, both small girls weeping and looking for support on each other.

"Is she really that good?" Negi asked Kazumi.

The reporter nodded solemnly. "Pretty much all of 2-F is rather good at sports. And Fujiyoshi-sempai is the best of them all by far. Not only that, but she's the Vice President of the Mahora Manga Club. She says that's her true vocation..."

Harumi snickered. "Yeah, it was me who induced Paru-chan into our fascinating subculture. Before meeting me, she couldn't even tell the uke apart from the seme..."

"What does that mean?" Negi asked.

Chisame covered his ears. "YOU'RE MUCH BETTER OFF NOT KNOWING!"

Haruna's head hung low in shame. "My image... My precious public image cruelly shattered..."

Another tall and shapely older student, with long black hair and surrounded by her own girl posse, warned 2-A in a low, jaded tone, "You're insane if you think you have any chance against those hideous beasts in a game. We used to be the champions of the Mahora dodgeball circuit until we faced them." Then she sobbed in a loud, theatrical way, "Since that bitter day, the Black Lilies of the St. Ursula Division never have been the same!!"

"Calm down, please, Eiko-chan!" one of her friends consoled her.

"Please, someone get her pills!" another one of her classmates called out.

Negi gulped, and most of his students quickly followed suit.

Only Asuna was fully unimpressed, crossing her arms and chuckling. "Do you think that scares us?"

"Yes!" Misora said.

"A lot!" Fumika cried.

"I'm too young to die!" Natsumi pleaded.

"I haven't even kissed a boy yet!" Ako confessed.

"Silence!" Asuna hushed them. "With which face will we, umm, face the rest of the school if we back away from these weirdos' challenge!-? Are we women, or mice? The first one to say 'mice' gets this in the face!" she held a fist up.

Nodoka, Natsumi, the twins, Misora and Ako quickly closed their mouths shut.

"For once, Asuna-san is right!" Ayaka regained her fighting spirit. "Girls, if we stand together, we won't fall to such uncouth opponents! Trust your Iincho! I shall guide you to victory in the name of Negi-sensei!"

Tsunetsuki Matoi giggled. "Love for such a small fry won't lead you anywhere! My first boyfriend was a professional dodgeball player! Twice a national champion! He taught me all he knows on the sport!"

"Matoi-chan has picked up a lot of great talents from all her boyfriends!" Kafuka piped in cheerfully. "Origami mastery! Whack-A-Mole playing! Expert gardening! Crosswords solving! Rhinoceros taming! Dub acting! Kabuki acting! Cat Dog trivia! Motorcycle repairing! Crack Fic writing!"

Matoi nodded proudly. "The power of my Deep Love has left a mistress of a thousand disciplines!"

"She dated a fanfic writer?" even Satsuki was repressing a face of disgust at that.

"Some people just has no standards!" Ayaka was feeling ill.

"It's worse than I thought, Jim."

"Oh?"

"They've made their first move. In Adriane."

"The magic school?"

"The same. Neutral territory as far as the big fish are concerned. But it's only going to get worse from here on out."

"How bad was it?"

"Yuri. Maid outfits. Cat ears. More fourth-wall breaking than you can shake a stick at."

"Good god... It's Third, isn't it?"

The dark-knight detective made an affirmative grunt. "The entire area's already been tossed into chaos. Footage was leaked onto the web within five hours."

"Lemme guess. Both the empires are accusing the other of hiding those four."

"If any one of them gain a foothold in Adriane, the entire balance of powers could be upset."

"And the really big families haven't even made a move," Gordon groaned. "The Sugar Cartel. de Cheese... and my men can't do a damn thing against the Cartel."

"Don't give up, Jim," the vigilante assured the old cop. "Keep your men on the lookout for any leads on the other three."

"And you'll handling the Cartel?"

"In a way."

A second later, Jim Gordon was left alone in his dim-lit office, with nothing but old case files and a dartboard with a picture of a certain clown taped to it to keep him company.

---

Arkham Asylum. Twenty Minutes Later.

"You can't be serious."

"You have nothing to gain from refusing."

Bruce was already beginning to regret his course of action. True, he had Oracle and a dozen other expert hackers at his command, but none of them could match the insane genius of the Cracklords. Even if they worked together, he doubted that they could thwart their actions without going mad themselves.

But the Joker had no mind left to lose.

"What's this? Trying to gauge my actions like a - (dramatic gasp) - sane man?" the homicidal harlequin mocked. "Get outta here before I tear those ears off yer head and shishkebab ya with 'em!"

"Joker, you don't like them any more than I do."

"They give ya headaches from dusk 'til dawn, don't they? The enemy of my enemy is my less-enemy-y enemy. Simple as A-B-Z."

"... fine. I'll go ask Hasegawa instead. She always did know more about computers than you. She can probably jam the crackfics faster than you, too."

With that, the tall figure strode away from the cell, silently counting the seconds 'til-

"Ugh. Fine! But I've got three rules. One, no pixie boots or short-shorts. Two, keep me out of a Threesome with Hasegawa and her teacher if it kills ya!"

"And three?"

"I'll think of that later."

"I'll be back with the equipment in two hours."

"... you out it that way on purpose, didn't ya?"

The swishing of a cape was his only answer.

"Love ya too, Bats!"

Minutes before...

A short while away, further into the capital city, Kazumi had returned to her flat. It was a nice space; sway with the royal family had its perks, and the neighbourhoods close to the palace were gorgeous. Mostly, though, she appreciated that it left her within radio range. She'd retired from Negi's birthday party early along with a few other girls, claiming that she didn't want to drink too much. A quick look around her flat at this moment would give the lie to that. There were too many empties scattered around the floor, Sakurako had too much in the way of mixing equipment arranged in front of her in the kitchen, and there was far too much sway in Mana's stagger as she paced around the room singing, half-full martini glass in hand.

"Estas son...las mañaniiiiitas que cantaron el rey David…"

Kazumi sniffed from her position on the couch. Mana was horribly out of tune. "Just how drunk are you, girl? I'd never thought I'd hear you singing birthday songs from Puerto Rico."

"Extremely!...drunk," answered Mana with the dignity of someone who is sloshed but too proud to accept it. She pointed at the reporter with the hand holding her martini. "Unlike me, that song...is from Mexico."

Sakurako shook her head and rested her elbows on the kitchen counter. "I think I'm cutting you off now, Mana-chan. You're taking this too hard."

"Too hard? Too goddamn hard?" Mana spluttered in drunken outrage, gesturing at the screens and whiteboard in front of the couch where Kazumi was sitting. "You two are robbing me blind and you accuse me of taking it too hard? You...you..." Lost for words, Mana gulped the rest of the martini down.

The screens and whiteboard were the centre of attention in the apartment, and necessary for the main reason the three girls were still up. With her considerable financial rewards gained from helping save the world, Kazumi had invested heavily in a home entertainment system, and now the three girls were watching the input from the Oculus Corvinus in high definition and surround sound. Kazumi had subtly arranged her Artifact's sensors at key points around Negi's quarters, and now they could track the activities of everyone entering or leaving their teacher's bedroom in normal light, x-ray, and infra red. Kazumi had thrown the x-ray setting on after realizing Evangeline didn't show on the infra red.

Next to the screens, the whiteboard contained a tally for the activity that was the girls' raison du fête. There was a long list of names, including every known classmate and associate they suspected of trying to visit Negi tonight - over 40 people in all. Besides them were three columns, one for each of the girls, in which the numbers were tallied on who better for or against a competitor appearing, how far they thought the competitor would get, and how much they'd bet on that. Eight names were crossed out, and from the red marks and calculations on the side, it was pretty clear that Shiina and Kazumi were cleaning Mana out.

Kazumi just sipped her rum and coke, dismissing the gunslinger with a snort. "Quit whining, bitch. Misa beat Ku Fei to Negi's apartment. You lost fair and square." She reached for a walkie-talkie and thumbed the button. "Any more movement in the hallway by Camera 3?"

A ghostly hand waved hello one one of the screens, and Sayo's voice came in over the intercom. The phantasmal schoolgirl didn't care for betting, and had really wanted to see the outcome of tonight's competition first hand. "I've got someone coming down the hallway. I think - yep, that's Chachamaru!"

While that exchange was going on, Mana had begun staggering in Sakurako's direction again. "She tells me to quit whining? And they call me ruthless!...Shiina...Shiina. Make me another martini, Shiina."

"Sure thing," came Shiina's response, as she reached under the counter for the water bottle. Mana's next martini was going to be extra soft. She turned to Kazumi as Sayo made her report. "Told you she had more nerve than Chisame. Pay up."

"DAMN it!" As Chachamaru reached the door on-screen, Kazumi stood up and reluctantly reached for her wallet, glaring at Shiina. "What the hell is Hasegawa waiting for? I was sure she'd beat the robot. I should've kicked you out when Misa showed up in that damn cake."

"On the kitchen counter please." Shiina gestured with her head as she spoke, her hands busy mixing Mana's next 'martini'. "Remember to update the board, and don't give me that. I told you the extent of my help, I didn't expect Madoka to get the cake to his room that fast, and I didn't bet on Misa since it wouldn't be fair."

"Even if you didn't bet on her, she still pushed more people out of the first ten. Chisame better make it in next with all the money I have on her. Sayo, Chachamaru pick us up on her sensors yet?"

"Doesn't seem like it!" came the response over the radio. "The window cameras should be out of her range. That zoom upgrade you got is really something!"

"At least you weren't betrayed by a friend," sobbed Mana as she accepted her fake drink. "Ku Fei...how could you? Not making it in the first ten okay, but getting beaten by Misa? Getting beaten by freaking Natsumi? How could - wait. Wait. Wait."

Kazumi realized by this point that Mana was pointing at one of the screens. She took a look at what she was pointing at, and promptly dropped her drink.

"Oh my," commented Shiina.

In the view of the Oculus Corvinus, walking determinately to Negi's door, was Sextum.

"Oh, yes," croaked Mana.

A quick look at the blackboard confirmed it - Kazumi had bet against Mana on the female Averruncus showing up at all the whole night.

"Oh, no," whispered Kazumi.

Ten to one odds.

"YES! YES YES YES!" Mana threw her drink glass over her shoulder, rushing to see the screen up close. "About damn TIME!"

"Holy shit!" squealed an excited Sayo over the radio. "Kazumi, do you see this?"

Kazumi did see this. Kazumi had not only made the bet against Mana, but also bet on Chisame making it in the first ten girls to try jumping Sensei's bones. When Sextum knocked on that door, she was going to cost Kazumi more than the HD screen Kazumi was watching her on. "NOOOOOOOOO!" the journalist screamed, running forward and shoving Mana out of the way to grip the TV. "YOU SOULLESS SLUT! NEGI SHOULDA KILLED YOU WHEN HE HAD THE CHANCE!"

Kazumi's ranting was cut off by a pistol barrel in her eye. "Get the fuck out of the way. Wanna see this."

"Umm, Mana," Shiina interjected nervously as Sextum proceeded to bankrupt Kazumi. "You promised no gun threats."

"Not demanding money." Mana watched the events on her screen with a slightly manic grin, looking at Sextum in the screen with what appeared to be open affection. "Just want to see my girl making money, God bless her."

As a sobbing Kazumi started forking over bills, Sayo's voice came over the radio trying to comfort her friend. Shiina had to chuckle when she noticed another unexpected figure appear in Hallway Camera 4. They hadn't even put Rainyday on the board; no one had expected her to try.

"Didn't see that coming. Damn." The cheerleader grinned and raised her margarita. "And to think Kugimin suggested I go to bed early!"