... K see when I ditched cable, I didn't have Discovery Family anymore, so I have to now go to fan-run streams when watching premieres, and for some reason, the stream I chose to watch The Heart's Warming Club started it at 11:45, meaning i only got to see the second half.

..... wait.

"The Heart's Warming Club".

The Breakfast Club.

:O

I didn't watch "A Matter of Principals" because I had a feeling I knew what I was in for from what I've read of the synopsis, and based on what I've seen and read, it was pretty much exactly what I thought. It was another obnoxious Jerkass Discord episode, which is sad cuz they were kind of beginning slide out of that with "Discordant Harmony" and "The Break Up Break Down".

I did watch "The Hearth's Warming Club" and that was cute. It was nice to finally have another episode focused on the Student Six and all the stories were very interesting.

So... A Matter of Principles

Overall, I can see why people wouldn't like this episode. The episode mostly consisted of Discord being a dick which was funny the first time around, but makes less sense after 5 seasons of reformation. Though they did try to justify it at the end.

At first I thought this would be another double episode like Just For Sidekicks, but the fact that the quest turned out to be fake and they made it a Noodle Incident at the end pretty much jossed that.

One thing I did like is that they at least confirmed that Starlight can't really banish Discord. Discord is pretty much the most powerful being in the show and even Celestia and Luna together with the Elements of Harmony couldn't get rid of him for good, so it would make no sense for some random unicorn to be able to banish him for real.

Also, I'm not sure what Spike's crack about tasting the gems was supposed to suggest, since if he actually ate them all, you'd think it would be immediately noticeable. Also, eww. Speaking of which, it's still weird seeing Spike with wings.

On to Hearths Warming Club:

This one was pretty interesting, even though it was just a frame story to talk about the different cultures. I was surprised that it was one of them after all. I assumed it was just someone else or a ghost or something.

Also, what is up with their scheduling? How come they never manage to get the Christmas episodes to air around Christmas? This one is in the middle of summer for crying out loud!

Edited by storyyeller on Aug 4th 2018 at 3:39:35 PM

I feel like Spike is 40% more adorable with wings and I can't determine why.

A Matter of Principals

Well, here we finally are again with another episode, and a school one, too. Including Discord. That should be good... right?

Hey look, the students are getting a little characterization! If only I could remember all their names. There's, um, Smoulder, the dragon. And the Yak girl, what was her name again? Hmm. Well, the Changeling student is bookish, and like Hermione, reads ahead.

Ocellus. Thats the one.

Twilight is showing artifacts of Clover the Clever and a bunch of other names I do not recognize. I wonder if this is going anywhere. I hope we are not getting ANOTHER sextet of new characters the show won't do anything with out of this.

The... The helm of WHO, now? I keep hearing a certain name, but there's no way that's right.

Also, ancient artifacts are making Spike hungry. And flying for no other reason than to remind us that he has wings, and that was a really meaningful change to the character, yes really, we promise.

Oh, I see, the artifacts represent the student's cultural heritages. And they were gifted to the school by Celestia. I guess they are from the Equestrian version of the British Museum.

Twilight is taking the students on a scavenger hunt. This already sounds way more fun and interesting than Discord wanting to be principal instead of the principals replacement principal.

Its the Butt Signal! Quick, to the Butt Cave! I mean Butt Castle! I mean Princess Castle!

So. It has finally come to this. After several seasons functioning as a plot coupon to get characcters into the plot, the Cutie Map has now been relegated to getting characters OUT of the plot. Come to think of it, that would have been a great way to allow for a Students focussed episode, and would have given Dracula more fuel for his revenge or whatever plot. If that ever happens, that is.

It could be for this episode, too, but Discord and Starlight are around, so clearly the episode is going to be about them, and the students will be backgrounded once again.

Wow, the school really IS right next to the castle. Was that mountain always there? That road leading up to the school looks steep as hell.

Yep, the Mane Six have ALL been called, to a place far, far away. Far away from any plot, that is. This is, what, the second time the whole group has been called? And we don't even get to see them go.

"Just getting there will take days." Since when? This is what you get when you are always Traveling at the Speed of Plot. I bet it would take mere hours if they were in a hurry.

"There won't be any teachers left to run the school." And there you have it. This is exactly what Dracula was warning against, and exactly what Twilight has dismissed all this time. You can't run a school when you can be called away for days at a moment's notice. And there's NO backup. I mean, does anyone even remember Cheerilee?

Rarity faints at the thought of unfinished seams. A bit much, I think. First of all, Rarity was never that comically squeamish about fashion. Second of all, she is a much stronger character than this.

And third of all... this is just plain sexist. This is that tired old cliche of the pretty girl fainting at the merest upset. This was getting very old in the LAST century, I don't know what it's doing in this one. It's turning Rarity in precisely the sort of character Lauren Faust was trying to avoid. Same with her shallow criticism of Pinkie's decor in Yakkity Sax.

So, if Twilight has a 70 point plan in place for this exact situation, why is Starlight so surprised? Does Twilight not let her employees know about all the roles they could be expected to fulfill in cases of emergency? This feels like something Starlight should already have known. Planning is more than writing a plan down, its also making sure everyone knows what the plan is and what their role will be. This goes doubly so for contingency plans.

Twilight just picks Starlight up with her magic and plops her in the principals chair. While funny, I suspect this is probably breaking several rules of etiquette for unicorns AND alicorns. :grin:

No, Twilight. No. Writing everything down is NOT "preparing you for everything you need". TALK to people. You should know this, you're the Princess of Friendship, for crying out loud. Communicating well is supposed to be your thing!

So, I have a question. Why do ponies write so much stuff on rolls of parchment when they have perfectly fine books? And even weirder, Twilight gives Starlight a huge stack of printer paper, AND a stack of parchment. This universe sure is all over the place with its technology at times.

Also, those stacks of printer paper look like when you just take new printer paper out of its covering and just stack a bunch of those.

"And Spike." I know you treat him like a slave at times, Twilight, but he's not your property. :grin:

Also, answer his question, dammit. Are you really planning for six months? Because then, yes, you should send everyone home.

"Then why not put [Spike] in charge?" Excellent question! But of course he doesn't qualify because, uh, Princess Spike? I don't know. It seems slightly petty, to be honest.

"Goodbye, Rarity. Uh, and everypony." Oh, great. It's Spike's juvenile crush again. I'm honestly getting a little tired of that old nugget.

Also, Spike is now obnoxiously flying in every scene he's in, apparently. Gotta show off those flappers.

And then Discord shows up, because of course he does.

"I seem to recall a whole song about how this school is about how this school is about making your own rules." I don't. Was that from that opening episode? Bit late to the party there, Discord.

Right. Discord is just here to be a dick again. For no reasons. When the cat's away, they say.

Starlight brushes Discord off, and now Discord is angry. Man, this conflict is contrived already.

"Discord and I are old Save Equestria buddies." That happened exactly once. And only because Flutters was kidnapped. And when have you ever hung out with him after that? I don't think you're buddies, exactly.

So, wait, Starlight is the replacement for the head mare AND all the teachers? She's doing SIX jobs at the same time? How, exactly, did Twilight think this was a good idea? Or that this could even work?

Annnd the school is Discorded. I swear, Discord is ready to snap back into villainy as soon as Flutters is out of the picture. And she's not even dead or anything. Nope, just off on adventure. That's all it takes to turn Discord back into a jerk.

The next thing on Twilight's to do list was to HIRE replacement teachers? You mean Twilight didn't arrange something beforehand? That's NOT planning for an emergency. That's basically telling your replacement to wing it and hope for the best.

Discord hired Iron Will, because... he's overbearing and scares children?

The yak is suddenly very shy and quiet. Odd. Why would she be timid around oversized loudmouths? She comes from a whole species of oversized loudmouths! :grin:

Wait, that was how she was SUPPOSED to ask? In a quiet whisper? Is that how Twilight is teaching friendship? That doesn't seem quite on the mark.

Wow, Cranky Doodle has gotten a bad case of the Villain Ball. He's making the students pamper them? I don't see how this has ANYTHING to do with his character. At all. This comes out of literally nowhere, just for the sake of this plot. He's a jerk for absolutely no reason.

And why is Starlight even allowing this, and not stepping in? Why are she and Spike spying on them from around doors and behind bushes, like they are not allowed to be seen? She's the principal! She can just walk in whenever she pleases! Stop being passive and helpless, Starlight! You HAVE the power.

The third teacher is a Dragonsneeze tree, and of course Smoulder sneezes fire over the classroom. Yeah, Discord is definitely back to being a mean troll, here.

I don't even know why Starlight is apparently convinced by Discord suggesting Twilight will be dissapointed in her, when it is so obviously Discord dicking around with her. Surely Starlight should be able to see through this paperthin "ruse".

"I think Discord's trying to test you." Oh, I see, we're back to Discord being a crazy teacher of life lessons again. I don't think it suits his character very well post-reform, since it requires him to be a jerkass.

You know, at this point, when you're being "challenged" by a mad god, it's probably understandable to just close down the school for the safety and well-being of the students. Better that than risk more disruption and bad lessons.

Speaking of bad lessons, the students are once again background fodder, and apparently subject to reverting their behaviour at the mere presence of a bad teacher. Clearly these students can no longer think for themselves once out of the spotlight.

Starlight. Starlight. You need FIVE teachers. Not three. Can't you count?

Discord is now being an obnoxious student. And he is not above endangering students. Yep, he's definitely going more evil as the episode goes along.

Wow, Starlight is ready to go toe to toe with Discord. Kind of want to see what that fight would be like.

"Well, he's not acting like it." I agree. Discord is being a massive asshole, and deserves to be taken down a notch.

"My problem? How is the fact that Twilight decided to put an incompetent, power hungry unicorn in charge of her school MY problem?" Well? How IS that your problem? Regardless of whether or not that's true, what business is it of yours? She's Twilight's student, not yours, Discord. Stop poking your muzzle in other people's problems.

And then Starlight just up and vaporizes him. Or banishes him from school forever. The visuals say first, she says second option. I'm putting my money on Discord tricking her, because that's his thing.

And, hot damn, she leaves a crackling, smoking gorge where Discord used to stand. No wonder the students look shocked.

"Discord is just being... Discord." Ever noticed how close the name Discord is to Dicksword? :grin:

Oh, hey, there's the backstory for the foreign legendary heroes. Better watch out, they'll be canon characters by the middle of season 9. :grin:

Why does this school have a hallway with pony armour? This building can't be more than a year old. It HAS no history to speak of. Why put pony armour here?

How does a Yak helmet possibly fit a normal piece of pony armour? That scale makes no sense.

And now the armour and paintings are attacking the students. Because Discord is trolling again, I assume.

"I thought you banished him from the school?" "Only his body! Apparently his ghost can come and go just fine!" Oh, so she DID vaporize him. But isn't he a spirit, or a god, or something? How does he have a mortal body and a ghost now? How does this even work?

"No offence, but I don't think magic is the answer against Discord." No? It seemed to work pretty well so far. All you need now is an exorcism spell, which I'm sure you have somewhere around here. This IS Twilight we're talking about, after all.

So, how does Starlight defeat Discord? She says sorry to him. Because she now understands why Discord is acting up: he felt left out.

He felt left out. I was right. I called it. Discord suddenly wants to go to Friendship School because he feels left out for whatever insane reason. Why he couldn't just ask Twilight, I don't know.

And Starlight now apologizes to HIM for leaving her out, even though that is not even her fault, and makes him deputy head mare.

The students think this is a terrible resolution to the plot, and are confused! And I agree! This stinks!

"Next time you want something, just ask for it, alright?" So there's the moral. Well enough, I suppose.

"Hey! Watch the wings!" Got it, viewers? SPIKE has WINGS now! Did you see them? Yes? You did? Good! We're SO glad you noticed!

"Discord! I can't believe you tricked us into going on a friendship quest that wasn't real!" So, Discord can manipulate the Friendship Map, now. Great. And yeah, I guess I should have seen that one coming, too. What a jerk.

So Discord is basically rewarded for being a massive asshole. Yes, it only lasts for a few minutes, but STILL, he totally got away with it. I can see why people don't like this episode much.

And, well, aside from Discord being a jerk, there's not much going on with this episode. If you enjoy Discord being a jerk to ponies and getting away with it, you'll like this, I guess. Otherwise, not so much.

Even though I did enjoy A Matter of Principles, I do feel that Discord owed Starlight and or at the very least the students an apology. Also knowing his track record, I would have half joked about him needing the school to become a better friend, but after watching this episode, it would kinda be for the best of everyone involved if he were to stay away.

Edited by cmarston1 on Aug 4th 2018 at 4:53:30 AM

Come now, Spike floating around like a tiny cherub is precious and I'll hear no other words on the matter.

Oh, yes, its perfectly cute, Im just poking fun at the episode for being so in-your-face with it. They really love that new flying animation and want to show it off as much as they can, clearly.

To be fair, if I suddenly got the ability to fly, I'd probably be flying at every opportunity too.

Also, Nicole said on Twitter that S Tarlight's spell had no real effect on Discord that he didn't allow to happen. He let himself be hit because it made her look like the bad guy in front of her students.

The Hearth's Warming Club

What an odd club name. Who would go to The Christmas Club? Oh well.

Yeah, I get the feeling we are starting halfway into a scene, too.

"Everycreature." Ugh. This word sounds offensive to the English language. :grin:

Student Pony is singing some off colour Christmas tune, and there is a very obvious Christmas tree. I think some writer did not get the memo that the ponies are not suposed to be celebrating actual Christmas. This feels a bit lazy: instead of a more interesting, unique pony holiday, it becomes Yet Another Christmas Ripoff.

Also, GREAT timing: a Christmas episode in what's probably going to be the worst heat wave in modern history. I'm not sure if that is a good or bad thing...

And its a Student Six episode because why not, I guess. I don't mind, but this holiday episode with the Students would probably resonate more if we actually had gotten to know these kids. I still don't know half their names.

The holiday even has two weeks of vacation. Not even trying.

"If you miss that train, its a really long walk." Yeah, remember, theres like ONE train line with ONE train for the entire continent! If you miss it, you're really out of luck.

And then a shady pony in the rafters pours something over the ... what was it? Fire of Friendship? And it turns into purple goo. Did we see this thing before? I get the feeling we didn't.

That stuff kinda looks like the Ooze, but purple this time.

Ooh, snow. Wouldn't you like to just gather a big pile and cover yourself up with it and be nice and cool? Mmm. Snow...

So the shadow ran into the dorms, and then dissapears. Looks like a closed room mystery. One of the creatures is sabotaging Christma- I mean Hearths' Warming.

Wow, the ponies are super aggressive about interrogating a bunch of kids. :grin:

Of course, we can already tell it can't have been Yona or Smoulder from the body type. And with a Changeling around, all bets are off, really.

Everyone's acting kinda suspicious, though. Maybe it turns out all of them had a hand in this.

Spike is using his flappers again. See, they just love to animate him flying.

"I didn't even know Changelings celebrated Hearth's Warming" "Oh yes! Its our favorite holiday!" Your entire species reformed, like, a year ago? I have a hard time believing that you would pick up a pony holiday THAT readily.

Oh look, a flashback to when Twilight introduced this celebration of pony history to the savages heathens Changelings. This smacks a bit of missionaries bringing Christianity to the lesser races. Why can't they celebrate something about their own history? It seems weird for them to celebrate something that does not remotely involve them or their own history.

Haha, look at the ignorant savages not understanding Christmas! Isn't that so funny? Yes, I know its humour for the younger viewers, but when you get older, this gets a bit of an odd undertone to it.

The humour also seems to hinge on a non-existent language barrier, which is a little odd. The Changelings behave like they are interpreting the holiday from a poor translation, but that doesn't make sense since they speak the same language.

Oh, we don't get to see the interviews. This is going to be a clip show of how every race interprets this pony holiday. I see how this going to go.

Actually, the Yaks have their own holiday. It's predictably primitive and violent, but hey, at least no pony missionaries here.

Also, its kinda weird how the Yaks are depicted as violent, brutish barbarians again, when Yakkity Sax was all about subverting just that.

My money's on Sandbar being the culprit, by the way. He has the best motivation: if everyone gets punished, everyone gets to stay at the school. With him. He doesn't want to spend the holiday all alone. Yep, that sounds about right for this show.

"Dragons don't really have holidays, do they?" "Nah." Honestly, I'm not that surprised that they don't. Out of all the species, they seem to barely have any culture at all. Their homeland is a barren wasteland, they seem to live in rough caves, they spend their days squabbling. I have yet to see an actual building, and they probably eat gems like Spike. Dragons are basically cavemen hunter gatherers, it seems.

... Okay, so there's a chandelier in the cave. Its still a cave. :grin:

And of course the dragon story is all about strong dragons defeating kind and weak ones.

This episode is all about showing how the friendship-less barbarians spend their winters, it seems.

Oh, hey, the students guessed the same thing about Sandbar as I did. Yeah, he IS the most obvious one.

Sandbar's story is hilariously bad. :grin:

Those interviews are REALLY fast, by the way.

The Hippogriffs celebrate their Independence Day from the Storm King. Congratulations, America, you are represented now. Hope you feel good about that.

Why is the hippogriff here, anyway? She doesn't strike me as one of the friendship-less races. What problem does SHE have with friendship? As far as I can tell, hippogriffs are doing just fine with making friends, already, so what are they getting out of this school?

Oh, its... what's his name. The griffin. He doesn't know what a nephew is. And he doesn't tell a story about home. He probably did it because he feels lonely.

So, if he doesn't have a family in Griffinstone, who has been raising him? Isn't there an orphanage? Or is he literally living on the streets?

Is... Is that why the Griffins sent him, specifically? Send the orphan street rat to the ponies so they don't have to deal with him? That's kinda sad. And horrifying.

"We kinda guessed it was you." Ah, I see, the ponies knew more about his situation than we did. Clearly this would never have worked as a twist if we actually had had the chance to get to know these characters and learn this about the hippogriff.

This episode is pretty cute and harmless apart from the slightly colonialist undertones. It works well enough, on its own.

The real problem is that this episode is written as if we already are intimately familiar with all these characters. It is the sort of episode that could come halfway through a season dedicated to these characters. The problem is, this is not THEIR show. These characters have had barely any character development, or any time in the forefront of an episode, really, until now. I think this is the most we have learned about these characters since their introduction, and that's not a good sign. There is no buildup from prior episodes that makes the emotional heart of this episode feel particularly earned. It is just handed out by the plot gods.

I think the difference between us here is that I loved this episode because it gave us more of an insight into the student 6. This is the kind of thing they were missing. I wanted an episode that showed off more of their chemistry together.

Also, maybe this is just the way my mind works and how little things just stick to me, but I don't get how someone couldn't know their names. It's Ocellus, Gallus, Sandbar, Silverstream, Yona, and Smolder. They're not particularly convoluted names.

Edited by GNinja on Aug 4th 2018 at 7:07:16 AM

I can remember Ocellus and Yona, but I have trouble with the others. Maybe because they are more generic names or less memorable.

I think it's just because I've:

A. Watched School Daze a fair few times. B. Spent a lot of time on Derpibooru looking at pictures of them.

Edited by GNinja on Aug 4th 2018 at 9:07:45 AM

I don't rewatch the episodes normally, but Yona always stood out due to being a Yak. I think it was around the field trip episode where AJ and RD ruin everything that I started remembering Ocellus's name.

The problem is that the pony and hippogrif have really generic names. Also, the pony hardly ever gets focus anyway.

Yona had slipped my mind momentarily, and I remembered Smoulder. Its just that they show up so little that I'm not really familiar with the characters yet.

And like I said before, I do like this episode on its own, but it falls a bit flat in context of the season, because the season has done very little work to build up these characters to this episode. I think this episode is the first serious bit of character work these characters have gotten since their introduction. Normally, this would be a sort of breather episode for these characters, not their big character building episode.

These characters need their own show so badly.

My comments on the episodes:

"A Matter of Principals"

• I thought it was funny in several parts (especially where Discord messes with Trixie), but I agree with the comments that Discord was kind of a Karma Houdini. Granted, it would be difficult to physically punish him, given his powers, but I'd like to headcanon that Fluttershy gave him quite the scolding afterwards.

"Hearthswarming Club"

• This one I liked better, and a story where the students share things about their cultures with each other is something I've been hoping to see since the school started.
• I realized that it might be fitting that the Changelings just tried to imitate pony customs rather than just making their own, given that they're used to being shapeshifters (so their powers involve imitating other creatures anyway). They might not have had as long as the other species to build up their own unique holidays, since they were only recently freed from Chrysalis's control.
• I also noticed that Sandbar's stories were about things that specifically happened to him rather than about pony customs in general. This would make sense because the students were already taught about pony Hearthswarming customs, so he wouldn't have to explain the more general things and could go straight into a more personal story.

Hmm, interesting, Changelings as imitators without any inherent creativity. It would certainly be a unique and interesting trait.

Sandbar is such an incredibly bland character here, I'm not even sure why he is part of the group, really.

If I have one gripe, it is that there is not enough space to go into all these character's stories. They are little more than vignettes. If you disliked the three-legends-around-the-campfire episode for being rushed, you'll likely think this is even worse.

By the way, for those who asked "why is there a winter-themed story in summer?", it's winter now in the Southern Hemisphere, so there would be some viewers watching the episode in winter. Including the viewers in Australia, who got the episode first.

Post of the Day #2234

Thanks guys... So... now that I've got that off my chest, back to ponies. For the last few weeks I've been messing around with my computer's settings, and with the Rainmeter program. This morning, I got a great new setup for it. The background is this really cool picture of Luna (link at the bottom). On the bottom of the screen, below the blue lines, I have a few icons spread into 3 sections. On the left is the date (day of the week, plus calendar date), the time, and the local weather. In the middle is the battery level, wifi status and speaker level. On the right is a set of buttons for locking/shutting down/restarting the computer. In the top right corner is a white Google Chrome icon, kind of like a star or a tiny moon, and if I click that it launches Chrome. Next to Luna, but hidden from view, is a 3x3 grid of icons for launching other applications. I have it set to fade into view if I hover over it, so it's there when I need it but not when I don't. The normal taskbar is hidden from view too, so it's out of the way. It's so cool. Here's the Luna pic: http://derpibooru.org/125?scope=scpeffa392bc2d04ceec6ee03d2cfb06e2614c120007

Yeah, I'm from the southern hemisphere (incidentally, Redmess, there were Christmas trees even in the very first Hearthswarming Eve episode, even if the tradition is more like Thanksgiving with Christmas aesthetics). That said, to us, winter themes are more of an abstract symbol of Christmas, as to us, Christmas is a summer holiday.

Is it a bit odd that ALL of those other cultures celebrate different holidays in the same two weeks?

Multiple real world cultures have holidays around that tie. Specifically because of the solstice.

08x14 - A Matter of Principals

So, the episode starts off with Twilight introducing six MacGuffins that will clearly belong to the students by the end of the season. Chekhov's Gun loaded and armed. It would be nice if the episodes that follow this centered around developing one of the artifacts and why that student is worthy of it, but given the show's terrible track record with Myth Arcs and the fact that its focus views the students as complementary side characters and not protagonists in their own right, I don't suspect that will happen.

"Princess Celestia gifted these to our school since they each represent one of the cultures our students come from!" …so why did she have them, then? This is a very uncomfortable line. I know they didn't mean to imply that the ponies totally looted sacred artifacts from other cultures hundreds of years ago, but they kind of implied that. It's not like diplomatic relations between cultures were previously such that these might have been gifts or something. Why does she have them, show? Why does she have them?

White Mare's Burden continues.

"Each of you will work in pairs to try to find where in the school these artifacts are hidden!" …I…I don't think that's a very respectful use of other cultures' sacred treasures, Twilight. I don't know that the yaks would be too pleased to know that the Helm of Ykslrg is stashed behind a bookcase waiting for some teenagers to put their grubby hooves on it and win an academic achievement point.

"The team that finds most wins a private tour of the Canterlot Archives with Princess Celestia!" …so your reward for completing this incredibly disrespectful scavenger hunt of other cultures' stolen treasures is to hang out with the pony monarch for a day. KAY.

"Gallus and Silverstream, it sounds like you're our first pair!" Everyone gasps but no, this is totally a teacher move. Interrupting class = totally volunteering for that thing you didn't mean to volunteer for.

"Um, why pony glowing?" Because the universe hates me. So let's break up this episode's meeting of the Weird Racism Quota for itself and several past episodes by moving on to the Bullshit Map! It's everything I wanted after the hiatus.

"Wait, you all were called on this friendship quest too?" Why is that unusual? The Map's summoned the whole team before. Hey, remember that time when summoning the whole team was literally the first thing the Map ever did?

"Do y'all know what this means? There won't be any teachers left to run the school!" Never change, AJ. Rainbow and Rarity are like, "But it's so far," and AJ's like, "How is this going to affect our ongoing work here?" Bit of her usual secondary leadership showing through, and also, it makes sense. AJ has a lot of experience balancing an already-full workload with the bajillion special projects that crop up. Both as a result of her friendships and because, as previous seasons established, she just can't leave a problem in her vicinity unsolved even when it has nothing to do with her.

Applejack is an ace at time management.

I also love how Twilight joins the others in gasping in horror. Even she hadn't considered this point. She came in all, "That's dealt with, now for the important stuff," and AJ's all, "Girls. Girls. We're teachers now. This is the literal exact situation that Dracula was worried about, y'all!"

"I say we take them with us! ROAD TRIP!!!" I like it, but I don't think you'll be able to get parental consent forms signed in the timeframe that the Map's presumably expecting you to operate on. Then again, the Map runs on predestination, so maybe it does intend for you to go get consent forms signed? I don't know, it's weird.

"Don't worry everypony! I already have a 70-point plan in place for this very situation!" I'm taking that wink at AJ for my ship and YOU CAN'T STOP ME.

"You want me to be headmare?!" Oh my god, yes. Bring the Legion. Having the Legion of Doom run the school for a day would be phenomenal! Disastrous, horribly disastrous, but amazing.

I WANT TO SEE TRIXIE TEACHING CLASSES

"I trust you to run this school exactly as I would!" Then you clearly haven't been paying attention! I mean, Twilight's not wrong that Starlight has leadership skills and studied friendship and all that, but she is kidding herself if she thinks Starlight will do things by her book. Starlight's a rebel. That she is so very not Twilight Sparkle was actually really important back in "A Royal Problem". Also, Starlight's the one who came up with the idea to f*ck the rules back in "School Daze".

I'm not saying she'd be a bad headmare, but she is definitely not the chip off of Twilight's block that Twilight's suggesting here.

"Which is why I've prepared everything you need!" Yeah, all of those books and scrolls are going in a fire just as soon as you're out the door. Starlight wings shit. That's how she rolls.

"Aaaand Spike!" She just gave Spike to Starlight. He didn't even know this was the plan; she clearly did not consult him on this. I like how she even picks him up and plops him on the pile. Like an OBJECT. Because he's an OBJECT.

Man, Twilight is really rocking the Master Race cloak this episode.

"Then why not put him in charge?" Because Spike has zero ambition to ever be in charge of anything. He likes his nice, comfortable life chilling with his pony friends. He wants to do the work and then hang with his pals; he has no aspiration to be in a decision-making position of authority. This is who he is and he's become comfortable with that.

"No-ho-ho thanks! Being a princess for Twilight was hard enough." Yeah! What he said!

"Goodbye, Rarity! …and everypony!" In his haste to flirt with Rarity, he forgot to say goodbye to Twilight. Good job, Spike.

"I hate goodbyes, don't you? I just go to pieces!" It's funny because he could solve whatever problem they're on their way to with a snap of his talons but that would be helpful so instead he's going to hang out here with Starlight.

"Item 1: Gravity is optional." And just like that, I'm on his side. Headdraconequus Discord it is!

No, but seriously, what are you doing here, Discord? If you wanted to troll Twilight, you'd be off with them. If you wanted to help Starlight, you wouldn't be doing it like this. That leaves either helping Twilight - AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA no - or trolling Starlight.

Like. I believe that Discord would have wounded feelings about not being invited to the school, but I don't buy that he's a big old coward who would wait until Twilight was out of the building before venting his frustration over it. When Discord's upset about something, he takes it right to you and gets in your face about it.

"Uh-oh. When we play Ogres and Oubliettes and he puts that many e's in "really", things don't usually end well." I like that Spike notes this. Between this and the Princess Spike reference, there's some nice attention to continuity here. Was this episode written by Nicole Dubuc?

….

Yes! Yes, it was! You can tell because she's watched the show before. It's her unique quirk as a writer.

"Discord and I are old Save Equestria buddies. It'll be fine!" SEE! Like that! SHE REMEMBERS STUFF.

"Come in, come in. You'll let the twittermites out." CONTINUITY, BOOM

"And after I hired all those substitute teachers for you." "Actually, that does sound kinda helpful." Did. Did Twilight not hire substitute teachers? Did she seriously only declare Starlight headmare and then f*ck off? There was really no room in her 70-point plan for the actual teachers who will replace the other Manes?!

I want to be bothered by this but I feel like it's actually well within Twilight's narcissism to be like, "Oh, no, the school will be without faculty?! This is terrible! There, I've arranged for MY job to be taken care of. That solves everything. ^.^" Man, it's a good thing Dracula is racist because otherwise shit like this would be proving him right. Thank you, convenient indefensible personality trait keeping the Strawman from Having A Point.

"It was next on our to-do list." That's better but no. Twilight should have hired the substitute staff herself before she left. You know. Because she's headmare.

"They call it making friends because you have to MAKE CREATURES BE YOUR FRIENDS." You laugh, but Iron Will would be phenomenal at Honesty class. He's an aggressive asshole who's been dishonest in many ways since we've known him but doesn't technically lie. Kind of like Applejack!

"Some field trip. Where's my iced tea?" …why? I don't even see what Discord would find funny about this. Iron Will was funny, but Cranky? Why would Cranky even agree to do this in the first place? I have so many questions right now.

"Now it's too tea-flavored!" I don't remember Cranky being this mean. Nicole, I love your attention to continuity, but I feel like there's some demonizing of Cranky going on here. Which is inherent to the fact that he, like Iron Will, is clearly meant to be here as a former slice of life villain. Which, you could technically argue that he sort of was for "A Friend in Deed", but that's a very Protagonist-Centered Morality way of looking at those events.

Cranky was the episode's antagonist, but this portrayal is marking him as its villain. That's an important distinction.

"You hired a tree as a teacher?!" I know that tree, but I can't quite place from where. Given the trend set by Iron Will and Cranky, I'm sure that tree was the source of conflict for one episode or another. I want to say it's the flower that gives out Swamp Fever from "A Health of Information"?

"It's a dragon sneeze tree." Aha! "Princess Spike", the tree that was supposed to be cut down but wasn't because the cutting was noisy. And then it made Spike sneeze and blow up the fancy statue at the end of his Humiliation Conga. This is less objectionable than Cranky but it does seem a bit obscure for a Continuity Nod.

"Won't Twilight be so disappointed with how you're ruining - I mean, running her school?" No. Literally all Starlight has to say is, "Discord happened," and Twilight will be like, "Of course, he did." There is no threat to Starlight's reputation here.

"It's kind of what he does. Even to dragons or ponies he cares about." No, he doesn't. Discord has never once trolled Fluttershy. The closest he's come is "Make New Friends but Keep Discord", and that was a sincere campaign of dejected retribution. "What he does" is be a big self-absorbed piss-baby who violently overreacts over imagined slights, and also troll Twilight regularly because it's funny to him. But "testing people" is giving him too much credit.

"I've brought in new new teachers!" Three, specifically, to replace the five who are missing. And one of them is Trixie so, y'know, Twilight clearly did not leave Starlight an actual list of substitutes to hire but just expected her to find ponies on her own. I did not expect to actually get Trixie when I said I wanted the Legion to teach. I am so happy right now. She's going to be worse than Discord's picks and it will be amazing.

Also, Spitfire! She's not a Doom Legionnaire but she is a slice of life villain, so she's right on par with Iron Will. Remember that time she lied to Soarin and made him stay on the bench because she wanted to trick Rainbow Dash into being her replacement flier?

Maud is not a villain. One could technically call her the antagonist for "Maud Pie" but only in the same sense as Cranky. She was a source of conflict but didn't actually do anything wrong.

You know who would be a good teacher and is also in the Legion of Doom? Thorax. But he's probably busy ruling a nation and not being a pony.

"Welcome, class! You may call me the Great and Powerful Professor Tri—" DISCORD. STOP TROLLING. I WANT TO SEE THIS.

"Magic is the most important element of friendship so today, I, the Great and Powerful Trixie will put on a magic show!" It's everything I wanted.

I mean, I can see her logic. Friendship IS magic! It's the central thesis of the entire show! But does that mean that magic is friendship? This warrants study.

"Um, hello? … What exactly is the long-distance plan?" Discord's agenda in this episode feels really forced but his antics are certainly at the top of his game.

"Discord, that's enough!" Hey. So. Remember when it took all six of the Manes to try and defeat the bugbear? The one that Starlight just drove off with a single shot? Yeah. That's a new bullet point to the "Starlight = MOST POWERFUL UNICORN EVER" list.

"I don't know why you're trying to ruin this school, but it stops now!" Starlight's mouth is writing checks her magic can't keep. So, basically, the exact same thing Twilight would do in this situation; good on her! Making demands of "THIS ENDS NOW" without any ability to force the issue if Discord refuses to acquiesce has always been a bit of a problem in Twilight's handling of Discord. Fluttershy is actually brilliant at managing him because she does it from a perspective where she knows she can't force him to do anything, but Twilight always tries to throw weight around that she does not possess.

I mean, the Elements of Harmony exist, but that's small comfort.

• Twilight: THIS ENDS NOW.
• Discord: No, it doesn't, lol.
• Twilight: Excuse me, everypony. I need to journey out to the Everfree Forest and try to collect the Elements of Harmony. But rest assured, THIS ENDS SEVERAL HOURS FROM NOW. Assuming Discord makes no effort to stop us, anyways.

Point is, aggressively yelling at Discord to cut it out only works when he permits it to. Neither Twilight nor Starlight have any power to actually make him do anything.

"I wouldn't be so sure." Case in point.

"This is your last warning." Seriously, I don't know what she thinks is going to happen here. Then again, she wasn't around for "Return of Harmony" so maybe she just doesn't know better.

"How is the fact that Twilight decided to put an incompetent, power-hungry unicorn in charge of her school my problem?" So it was to troll Starlight all along. This fixes Discord's motivation issue nicely. He wasn't testing her like Spike proposed. He's upset that she was chosen to take over for Twilight and is making her life miserable in retribution. That sounds about right.

"Don't worry! I just banished him from school grounds forever! He's fine!" …that didn't seriously work, did it?

No. Seriously. Tell me that didn't work. Because if that worked, then she just flexed more power than even Princess Celestia has ever been shown to have. And that is beyond ridiculous.

"I've been doing a terrible job as headmare." What?! No. Literally the only thing you've done as headmare is hire Trixie, Spitfire, and Maud. And yes, those are questionable choices and also you're still short two teachers, but you haven't even had a chance to see negative consequences for it because Discord's antics have consumed the entire episode. You have no reason to believe this.

I know that self-pity is Starlight's thing and all, but this is really unearned.

"I thought you banished him from the school!" "Only his body! Apparently his ghost can come and go just fine." So I'm still pissed off that she was able to actually do that, but I'm glad to see that it only minorly inconvenienced Discord nonetheless. So Starlight is not quite as powerful as the Elements of Harmony, but still far more powerful than Princess Celestia, who has been demonstrated to be utterly helpless against Discord without the Elements.

"It's not haunted, it's Discord." You said it's Discord's ghost so, technically, it is actually haunted.

"I was so worried about doing things Twilight's way, I didn't stop to think about being a good friend." …uh, no. No, that's a bad lesson. Starlight took her job seriously and tried to execute it professionally rather than handing out positions based on nepotism. That's not a bad thing. It's not. I don't know why you would think it's a bad thing. When you're on the clock, the job comes first. Being in a position of authority is not supposed to be an opportunity to do favors for your pals.

"I'd like to apologize for that and offer you the job of Vice Headmare." YOU HORSE YOUR SHUT MOUTH. NO. ABSOLUTELY NOT. NO. Discord should not be rewarded for being a belligerent piss-baby over not being picked for a job he's unqualified for on a basis of who he's pals with. This is a terrible resolution that is actively going out of its way to endorse nepotism.

"I will need my own office, expense account, parking space—" "You're new to the world of education, aren't you?" It hurts because it's true.

"Discord! I can't believe you tricked us into going on a friendship quest that wasn't real!" …is…is this necessary? I'm getting flashbacks to "What About Discord?" here. We've already resolved the episode's events, so is it really necessary to add in a bit of "And then Discord was a BAD GUY" at the end?

I mean, unlike that episode, Discord's villainy has been on full display for this entire episode. The only reason him being the villain of the episode is even in question is because of Starlight's shitty attempt at a moral just now. Unless….

Oh, no. Tell me this isn't being done to give Starlight an opportunity to defend Discord to Twilight. Tell me that's not where this is going.

"Guess this means you're not Vice Headmare anymore." Okay, so it was done to defang the shitty moral and undo Starlight's terrible nepotism decision, on the logic that this comeuppance somehow makes it okay that the moral featured Starlight apologizing to Discord for not giving him a position of authority five seconds after being made Substitute Headmare. See, this is the kind of conclusion that should make you stop and go, "Wait, if I need to immediately reverse my resolution in order to make it seem fair, maybe my resolution is just f*cked up and needs to be revised."

So. Yeah. There's a lot not to like about this episode. But it's also a fun and energetic episode with some great jokes and character moments. This is a violently atrocious episode with an awful moral and terrible characterization decisions, executed hilariously and delightfully well. Easily one of the worst and funniest Discord episodes ever produced.

Edited by TobiasDrake on Aug 5th 2018 at 11:13:55 AM