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WMG / I Hate Fairyland

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Queen Cloudia is the series' Big Bad.

She's also probably why Gert is in Fairyland in the first place.
  • Jossed: She gets killed within the first volume.
    • Technically true, since the series was originally going to be 5 issues, hence making her the Big Bad.
      • Confirmed in the final story arc.

Gert is in Fairyland because she was chosen to be the next ruler of Fairyland.

The current ruler can't quite conceive, so he/she decided to try other methods to find an heir to the throne. Like stealing children from their own homes regardless of whether they want to or not.
  • Actually it was stated in the first issue that Gertrude wished to go to Fairyland. She was just a six-year old girl at the time and didn't know any better. The main problem is that the quest to find the thing to take her home should have lasted a day, but has gone on for 27 years and Gertrude is fed up with the place.

Time in Fairyland will be a variation of Year Inside, Hour Outside.

Ok, so it's established that Gertrude has spent 27 years in Fairyland, but while her appearance hasn't changed at all, her mind evolved to that of a 33-year old. So, by the time she goes home, the 27 years she spent in Fairyland will have been the equivalent of 5 or so hours in the real world.
  • Evidently not. The finale implies that Gert was sent back into the real world as a regular girl and lived her life out to adulthood.

Gert still wears the outfit she came to Fairyland in, for a reason.

Gert still appears to be wearing the same outfit she came to Fairyland in, even 27 years later. She could probably have gotten other clothes at some point, but she still keeps the same outfit and goes out of her way to keep it wearable because it's one of the few connections to her old life on Earth she has left. That could also be why she occasionally says that things or people are the worst, even though she has no problem swearing. That sounds like the kind of thing a six-year old girl would say. It was probably something Gert said back on Earth. So she still uses it from time to time, to keep from forgetting it.

Gert has ADHD.

That could be why it's taken her so long looking for the key. She has too much energy for her own good, a short attention span and has difficulty focusing on details. On a quest that involves solving complex riddles and remembering detailed instructions ADHD would make getting anywhere nearly impossible. Gert probably had medicine for it back home. It might have even fallen into Fairyland with her, but no one knew what it was for, so no one thought to give it to her. If Gert had had her medicine her quest would have only taken a few days at most and none of this would have happened.

The key won't work for Gert.

The prophecy states only a child can use the key, but Gert is only a child physically.

Gert could just wish for the key.

But she doesn't consider that, because she's stupid.

If Happy ends up trapped in Fairyland, she'll end up like Gert.

In bringing Happy to Fairyland, Queen Cloudia has just got another kid meeting the same fate.


Gert and Happy will be forced to work together.

Some force will threaten both of them, or even the human world itself. Gert and Happy will have to team up to take it down. They won't like it, but they'll have to do.

Happy isn't really human.

Queen Cloudia tried to bend the rules of Fairyland and bring another human child in, but it didn't work. So, she used some type of magic to create a fake child instead. This is either to motivate Gert to find the key and get out or subvert the rules of Fairyland and allow Gert to be harmed.

Gert's Life back home isn't as good as she remembers it.

She's looking back through rose colored lenses. Besides, it's been so long she doesn't remember a lot of the details anyway.

If Gert ever does go home her years of not growing will catch up to her.

It won't be as bad as diabetic tumor Gert. But Gert will end up with the body of a broken-down, middle-aged woman.

Gert will pull off a Rage Against the Author.

At some point, Gert will find a hole into the fabric of time and space and come across Skottie Young. She'll mouth off at him for not letting her go home sooner and threaten to slaughter him until he writes her a better ending that will get her home.
  • In the I Hate Image comic Gert doesn't get her hands on Young, but succeeds in murdering other Image comic writers/artists.

Gert will actually prove to be a competent ruler.

Being backed by one of the seven deadly dooms means no one would dare cross her, not even the major villains. As a result, Fairyland becomes quieter and more peaceful under Gertrude than it ever was under Cloudia.
  • Jossed: Gert was such a terrible ruler that she gets booted off the throne within a year.


Gert's body is growing again, she just hasn't noticed yet.

Cloudia was right about one thing. From the moment that door slammed in her face, Gert has officially stopped being a guest of fairyland, she's a resident now. Which means her body has started growing normally, again. She hasn't noticed yet, because her body is still too young for any clear signs to show. But, Gert has, at long last, started down rocky road to puberty.
  • Jossed A flash forward shows that Gert will still look six years old a hundred years from the present.

Happy will return.

She will shown. To be alive and Gert realising that they are both stuck decided to try and mentor her.

Some force is using Gert to get to Earth.

Some evil force intends to take over Earth, but can't get there, because there's no magic. Whenever a guest's door appears, a little magic leaks through, but not enough to have a major affect, since the door only stays only a day or two at a time. Some evil force purposely made Gert have a hard time getting her key to keep the door present as long as possible. The longer the door stayed, the more magic leaked into Earth and eventually it would be enough to open a permanent door and invade. Queen Cloudia's plan with Happy closed the door and messed up this plan, but, enough magic has leaked through that small, temporary holes have begun to appear in the wall between Earth and Fairyland. Duncan got in by falling through one of these holes, he's not a guest. If the wall isn't fixed, it could break down completely, merging Earth and Fairyland into one world and allowing some evil force, possibly the Seven Deadly Dooms to take over both.

Gert and Cloudia were actually friends, once.

When Gert first arrived and things were taking longer than expected Cloudia was very friendly and even encouraging towards her. But, as the years worn on, Gert became more and more fed up and her body count started to increase they became more distant. At the time of the moon shooting incident they probably hadn't spoken in several years.

Larry doesn't have to stay with Gert anymore.

When Gert came to Fairyland he was assigned as her guide. But, after Gert became queen that duty officially ended. But, Larry stayed with Gert anyway. At first it was probably to keep queen Gert from wreaking total havoc, but after Gert was fired Larry still stuck with her. Larry probably realizes that he's Gert's only friend and without him around she'd probably be a hundred times worse. And now that Gert is genuinely trying to be a better person Larry is doing everything he can to help her.

Gertrude was pulled into Fairyland on her eighth birthday.

Gert was obsessed with fairies and fantasy at the time, so she insisted on having a fantasy fairy party. She wore a bright pink party dress with yellow buttons, a yellow ribbon and a paper crown she had made herself. When the time came to blow out the candles on her cake and make a wish, Gert wished to be taken away to an amazing world filled with wonder and magic and laughter and joy. The party had just wrapped up and Gert had retired to her room, surrounded by her birthday presents, stuffed toys, a fairy castle and a toy fairy wand. Sugar high from the birthday cake, Gert began to dance around her room, singing and waving her toy wand around, when her wish came true and the floor ate her.

Fairyland itself is keeping Gert from leaving.

She's needed there for some greater purpose.

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