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Quotes / There Are No Girls on the Internet

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Black Hat: Hi. I'm here about the girl who visited your IRC channel last night looking for Java help.
Nerd: What did you do to my door?
Black Hat: When someone with a feminine username joins your community and you say "OMG a woman on the Internet" and 'jokingly' ask for naked pics, you are being an asshole. You are not being ironic. You are not cracking everybody up. You are the number one reason women are so rare on the Internet. At least, the parts of it you frequent. As someone who likes nerdy girls, I do not appreciate this. I'm here to ban you from the Internet. The gal behind me with the EMP cannon is Joanna — she'll be assigned to you for the next year. Try to go online and she'll melt your PC.
Nerd: Dude, she's hot. Is she single?
Black Hat: Joanna, fire.
xkcd #322: "Pix Plz"

Troll: Prove ur a girl.
Gen: You don't want me to do that.
Troll: Lol prove it!
Gen: Let's see... I got my first period when I was eleven I was in fifth grade English class and had to ask the teacher if I could go to the nurse's office and...
Twenty Minutes Later
Gen (smug grin): So, what do you think?
Chat member: Gen, he left nineteen minutes ago. The rest of the channel has passed out, I think.

I was never mistaken for male on the internet until I started drawing cute little ponies. What a strange world.
Modern-Warmare, commenting on a Danbooru post

Neo: Trinity? The Trinity? The one that cracked the IRS d-base?
Trinity: That was a long time ago.
Neo: Jesus, ummm...
Trinity: What?
Neo: Well, it's just, um... I thought you were a guy.
Trinity: (slight smile) Most guys do.


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