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Drinking Game / Ultamite Nineball

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  • Take a shot every time you don’t know how to pronounce a character’s name.
  • Take a shot every time a character reveals a new superpower.
  • Take a shot for every dream sequence.
  • Take a shot for every unnecessary set of parentheses, surplus exclamation mark, or extra-long ellipsis.
  • Take a shot for every reference to metal music or Stephen King’s Dark Tower Sequence.
  • Take a shot whenever a shouted word is stretched out, including the silent E.
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  • Take a shot every time “human” words are used because the author seems to forget that his characters are talking animals.
  • Take a shot for every implausible weapon (i.e. swords with ice blades and medieval bows made out of metal in a forge).
    • Finish the bottle when the implausible weaponry starts talking.
  • Take a shot for every misogynistic undertone, e.g. seventeen-year-old girls being indistinguishable from seven-year-old ones and being “bound to be raped sooner or later”.
  • Take a shot for every blatant anachronism.
  • Take a shot every time the timeline gets confused, e.g. when Aveena and Leif apparently never went to sleep over at least several days, or when switching randomly between years and seasons.
  • Take a shot every time a villain is Obviously Evil.
  • Take a shot every time a character tacks "eh" onto a sentence.
  • Take a shot every time someone does something completely stupid, two shots if it works.
  • Drink the whole bottle every time a chapter consists of one run-on sentence.
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  • Pause to cry or laugh as necessary every time you find yourself wondering what the hell this has to do with Redwall in the first place.
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