History Quotes / Superdickery

->''A hero rises … after being ''inconvenienced'' when his ''vacation plans'' are ''[[BusmansHoliday disrupted!]]'' The ''Amazing Spider-Man!!!!!''
-->--'''''Blog/TheComicsCurmudgeon''''' on ''ComicStrip/SpiderMan'', [[https://joshreads.com/2018/12/the-tickets-dramatic-music-sting-are-non-refundable/ "The tickets [dramatic music sting] are NON-REFUNDABLE"]]

->''They told us that ''[[Film/SupermanReturns Returns]]'' just skipped over ''Superman III'' and ''IV'', but I prefer to think of it as the movie that would’ve happened if Superman never got over being a douchebag in this one.''
-->--'''Chris Sims''', '''David Uzumeri''', and '''Matt Wilson''' [[http://comicsalliance.com/comicsalliance-reviews-superman-iii-1983-part-one/ on]] ''Film/SupermanIII''

->"Hordes of impressionable poverty-stricken young people having all their arms and legs broken by an extremely-rich businessman."
-->--'''''WebAnimation/ZeroPunctuation''''' on ''VideoGame/BatmanArkhamCity''

->'''Jay:''' This genetic experiment? The best superpower that Captain America comes out of it with is the ability [[PlayingSick to pretend he's sick]] so he can [[HeroStoleMyBike steal peoples' cars]].\\
'''Jack:''' "I can [[WhatKindOfLamePowerIsHeartAnyway run slightly faster than an old man!]]"\\
'''Jay:''' What a dick!
-->--''[[WebVideo/BestOfTheWorst Best of the Worst]]'' watches ''Film/CaptainAmerica1990''

->''This must be ''Series/AmericanBandstand'', because you’re a dick, Clark.''
-->--''[=ComicsAlliance=]'' [[http://comicsalliance.com/smallville-adrianne-palicki-episode-3-22-covenant/ on]] ''{{Series/Smallville}}'' ("Covenant")

->''As he leaves, Superman comes across [[{{Glurge}} a magical white child]] who appears and offers him candy. Superman smiles, asks this random little kid [[ChildrenAreAWaste to deliver a message to the drug dealers for him]] (?!?)"''
-->--'''Jason Michelitch''' on ''ComicBook/SupermanGrounded'', [[http://comicsalliance.com/worst-comics-2010-superman-grounded/ "The 5 Worst Comics of 2010"]]

-->--'''Jason Michelitch''' on ''[[Creator/JMichaelStraczynski Superman: Grounded]]'', [[http://comicsalliance.com/worst-comics-2010-superman-grounded/ "The 5 Worst Comics of 2010"]]

->''"Hordes of impressionable poverty-stricken young people having all their arms and legs broken by an extremely rich businessman."''
-->--'''''WebAnimation/ZeroPunctuation''''', erm, [[FridgeHorror unique perspective]] on ''VideoGame/BatmanArkhamCity''

->'''Jay:''' This genetic experiment? The ''best'' superpower that Captain America comes out of it with is the ability [[PlayingSick to pretend he's sick]] so he can [[HeroStoleMyBike steal peoples' cars]].\\
'''Jack:''' I can [[WhatKindOfLamePowerIsHeartAnyway run slightly faster than an old man!]]\\
'''Jay:''' What a dick!
-->--''[[WebVideo/BestOfTheWorst Best of the Worst]]'' watches ''Film/CaptainAmerica1990''

->''"Admittedly, this is perfectly in character for Serena — she always was a little selfish — but dang, those poor kids who wrote in asking if they could one day become Sailor Scouts probably had their whole weekend ruined when Sailor Moon not only told them no, but told that one poor kid he was a “bean brain.” Not cool, Serena. At least let me--[[IHaveThisFriend uh, them]] down gently."''
-->--'''[[http://comicsalliance.com/because-we-love-you-heres-17-minutes-of-live-action-sailor-moon-life-lessons/ Chris Sims]]''', "17 Minutes Of Live-Action Manga/SailorMoon Life Lessons"

->''"Why does Jack spend an inordinate amount of time posing with his hands on his hips atop vertiginous buildings looking out across Cardiff? Surely he isn’t lording it over what he consider to be ''his'' town? And if so, wouldn’t have set his sights on [[SmallNameBigEgo something a bit sexier?]]"''
-->--'''[[http://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=5386390949828958591&postID=6384766376348952377&isPopup=true Joe Ford]]''' on ''{{Series/Torchwood}}'', [[{{Recap/TorchwoodS1E1EverythingChanges}} "Everything Changes"]]

->''"This must be ''Series/AmericanBandstand'', because you’re a dick, Clark."''
-->--''[=ComicsAlliance=]'' [[http://comicsalliance.com/smallville-adrianne-palicki-episode-3-22-covenant/ on]] ''{{Series/Smallville}}'' ("Covenant")

->''"Jor-El says, ''"If you save Lana, [[BalancingDeathsBooks someone else will die.]]"''\\\
And Clark says, ''"[[YouCanKeepHer Okay, I'll kill someone.]]"''\\\
Just in case you missed that. Because I'm so mad I want to [[HitYouSoHardYourXWillFeelIt kick my own head so hard it doesn't land until I finish college]]. And I dropped out to write. I'm not finishing."''
-->--[[http://www.supermanhomepage.com/tv/tv.php?topic=reviews/smallville5-ep12 Neal Bailey]] on ''{{Series/Smallville}}'' ("Reckoning")

->'''Chris''': Superman flies out to space and listens to things for a little bit, and I’m not sure if this is intentional on Singer’s part or if we’re just reading into it, but he definitely hears sirens and gunfire and babies crying, but doesn’t move an inch until he hears the alarm from someone robbing a bank. Superman is all about the 1%, y’all.\\
'''David''': I never picked up on that. Oh my God, he really has truly messed up priorities.
-->--''[=ComicsAlliance=]'' [[http://comicsalliance.com/comicsalliance-reviews-superman-returns-2006-part-one/ on]] ''Film/SupermanReturns''

->''"Superman’s brilliant strategy for getting rid of the drug dealers is to set fire to the drug stashes in each of their houses with his heat vision, and then… [[MissingStepsPlan leave]]. Now, I guess you can read the comic and assume that he has the whole thing under control because, you know, he’s Superman. But [[InferredHolocaust setting a half-dozen large fires throughout a neighborhood and then just walking away]] seems stupid.\\\
As he leaves, Superman comes across [[{{Glurge}} a magical white child]] who appears and offers him candy. Superman smiles, asks this random little kid [[ChildrenAreAWaste to deliver a message to the drug dealers for him (?!?)]]"''
-->--'''Jason Michelitch''' on ''[[Creator/JMichaelStraczynski Superman: Grounded]]'', [[http://comicsalliance.com/worst-comics-2010-superman-grounded/ "The 5 Worst Comics of 2010"]]

->''"This must be ''{{American Bandstand}}'', because you’re a dick, Clark."''

-->--'''[[http://comicsalliance.com/because-we-love-you-heres-17-minutes-of-live-action-sailor-moon-life-lessons/ Chris Sims]]''', "17 Minutes Of Live-Action Anime/SailorMoon Life Lessons"

----

->''"hy does Jack spend an inordinate amount of time posing with his hands on his hips atop vertiginous buildings looking out across Cardiff? Surely he isn’t lording it over what he consider to be ''his'' town? And if so, wouldn’t have set his sights on [[SmallNameBigEgo something a bit sexier?]]"''

->''"Hordes of [[FridgeHorror impressionable poverty-stricken young people]] having all their arms and legs broken by an extremely rich businessman."''
-->--'''''WebAnimation/ZeroPunctuation''''' on ''VideoGame/BatmanArkhamCity''[='s=] premise

->''"For all his bluster about 'With Great Power Comes Great Responsibility', Peter Parker is probably [[BrokenAesop the most irresponsible super hero ever.]]"''
-->-- '''''WebVideo/AtopTheFourthWall''''' on ''ComicBook/OneMoreDay''

->''"You’d think that Peter Parker’s own extremely non-lucrative journalism career would give him a little more sympathy for the sad souls who [[ReassignedToAntarctica pissed their editors off enough]] to be exiled to the Spider-Man beat for their various publications. But nope, being Spider-Man means you can just be a stone-cold dick to whoever you want!"''
-->--'''''Blog/TheComicsCurmudgeon''''' [[http://joshreads.com/?p=20186 on]] ''ComicStrip/SpiderMan''

->'''Spider-Man:''' This is like when [[Film/TheAmazingSpiderMan Harry Osborn needed my blood to save his own life]], but I wouldn't share it with him for some reason, even though sharing my super-blood to save a friend's life is a pretty straightforward superhero thing to do. Which makes it even weirder that I spent so much time convincing everyone that Harry and I were old friends. It's almost like I'm ... Oh, God. I didn't realize this but ... I'm an asshole.
-->--'''''{{Website/Cracked}}''''', [[http://www.cracked.com/blog/4-things-about-spider-man-that-dont-make-any-damn-sense_p2/#ixzz31dYwzb7R "4 Things About Spider-Man That Don't Make Any Damn Sense"]]

->''"Should you ever doubt that the Internet is truly a magical place, consider this: Any time you want, you can head over to [=YouTube=] and watch [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zOkzfntbWLQ#t=16 a VHS rip of 17 minutes of live-action bumpers from 1995]] where an actress dressed as Japan’s greatest superheroine talks about the episodes, gives life lessons, and reads fan mail....Maybe the best part of the entire thing, aside from the gloriously cheerful enthusiasm that (Tia) Browsh shows in her role, is how completely harsh she is in [[DearNegativeReader shutting down questions from fans]]. Admittedly, this is perfectly in character for Serena — she always was a little selfish — but dang, those poor kids who wrote in asking if they could one day become Sailor Scouts probably had their whole weekend ruined when Sailor Moon not only told them no, but told that one poor kid he was a “bean brain.” Not cool, Serena. At least let me--[[IHaveThisFriend uh, them]] down gently."''

->''"Creator/JohnBarrowman, possibly the world’s greatest entertainer (he can sing, dance and present with equal aplomb) but [[TomHanksSyndrome not the world's most gifted actor]], finally gets his own drama to front and the results are variable at best...Jack’s joke for everybody to ignore Gwen and go about their business as she [[YouGetMeCoffee stands there holding the pizza]] should work far more effectively than it does, but the net result is that this crew seem even more conceited than they already did. Why does Jack spend an inordinate amount of time posing with his hands on his hips atop vertiginous buildings looking out across Cardiff? Surely he isn’t lording it over what he consider to be ''his'' town? And if so, wouldn’t have set his sights on [[SmallNameBigEgo something a bit sexier?]]"''

->''"In ''Superman #701'', our hero runs some black drug dealers out of a foreclosed neighborhood in which they’ve set up shop. (These are, it should be mentioned, [[UnfortunateImplications the first and nearly only black people]] he meets while walking through {{Philadelphia}}, a city with a higher proportion of African-Americans than New York City.) Superman’s brilliant strategy for getting rid of the drug dealers is to set fire to the drug stashes in each of their houses with his heat vision, and then… [[MissingStepsPlan leave]]. Now, I guess you can read the comic and assume that he has the whole thing under control because, you know, he’s Superman. But [[InferredHolocaust setting a half-dozen large fires throughout a neighborhood and then just walking away]] seems stupid.\\\

->Creator/JohnBarrowman, possibly the world’s greatest entertainer (he can sing, dance and present with equal aplomb) but [[TomHanksSyndrome not the world's most gifted actor]], finally gets his own drama to front and the results are variable at best...Jack’s joke for everybody to ignore Gwen and go about their business as she [[YouGetMeCoffee stands there holding the pizza]] should work far more effectively than it does, but the net result is that this crew seem even more conceited than they already did. Why does Jack spend an inordinate amount of time posing with his hands on his hips atop vertiginous buildings looking out across Cardiff? Surely he isn’t lording it over what he consider to be ''his'' town? And if so, wouldn’t have set his sights on [[SmallNameBigEgo something a bit sexier?]]"''

->So, in this comic we find out ComicBook/{{Superboy}} would rather be pimping out his ho than saving innocents.

->Hordes of impressionable poverty-stricken young people having all their arms and legs broken by an extremely rich businessman.

->For all his bluster about 'With Great Power Comes Great Responsibility', Peter Parker is probably [[BrokenAesop the most irresponsible super hero ever.]]

->You’d think that Peter Parker’s own extremely non-lucrative journalism career would give him a little more sympathy for the sad souls who [[ReassignedToAntarctica pissed their editors off enough]] to be exiled to the Spider-Man beat for their various publications. But nope, being Spider-Man means you can just be a stone-cold dick to whoever you want!

->Should you ever doubt that the Internet is truly a magical place, consider this: Any time you want, you can head over to [=YouTube=] and watch [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zOkzfntbWLQ#t=16 a VHS rip of 17 minutes of live-action bumpers from 1995]] where an actress dressed as Japan’s greatest superheroine talks about the episodes, gives life lessons, and reads fan mail....Maybe the best part of the entire thing, aside from the gloriously cheerful enthusiasm that (Tia) Browsh shows in her role, is how completely harsh she is in [[DearNegativeReader shutting down questions from fans]]. Admittedly, this is perfectly in character for Serena — she always was a little selfish — but dang, those poor kids who wrote in asking if they could one day become Sailor Scouts probably had their whole weekend ruined when Sailor Moon not only told them no, but told that one poor kid he was a “bean brain.” Not cool, Serena. At least let me--[[IHaveThisFriend uh, them down gently.]]

->Creator/JohnBarrowman, possibly the world’s greatest entertainer (he can sing, dance and present with equal aplomb) but [[TomHanksSyndrome not the world's most gifted actor]], finally gets his own drama to front and the results are variable at best. What baffles me about Barrowman is that on occasion he can bring his performance down to a very sensitive, mesmerising level but more often than not he chooses to overplay his dialogue and [[HamAndCheese murder a scene]]... It’s frustrating because the potential is there for him to be a fine leading man but he just needs somebody to whisper in his ear that he is playing the part a little too tongue in cheek at times. He’s a little like latter day Creator/TomBaker in that regard. Jack’s joke for everybody to ignore Gwen and go about their business as she [[YouGetMeCoffee stands there holding the pizza]] should work far more effectively than it does but the net result is that this crew seem even more conceited than they already did. Why does Jack spend an inordinate amount of time posing with his hands on his hips atop vertiginous buildings looking out across Cardiff? Surely he isn’t lording it over what he consider to be ''his'' town? And if so, wouldn’t have set his sights on [[SmallNameBigEgo something a bit sexier?]]

->This must be ''{{American Bandstand}}'', because you’re a dick, Clark.

->Jor-El says, ''"If you save Lana, [[BalancingDeathsBooks someone else will die.]]"''\\\

Just in case you missed that. Because I'm so mad I want to [[HitYouSoHardYourXWillFeelIt kick my own head so hard it doesn't land until I finish college]]. And I dropped out to write. I'm not finishing.

->In ''Superman #701'', our hero runs some black drug dealers out of a foreclosed neighborhood in which they’ve set up shop. (These are, it should be mentioned, [[UnfortunateImplications the first and nearly only black people]] he meets while walking through {{Philadelphia}}, a city with a higher proportion of African-Americans than New York City.) Superman’s brilliant strategy for getting rid of the drug dealers is to set fire to the drug stashes in each of their houses with his heat vision, and then… [[MissingStepsPlan leave]]. Now, I guess you can read the comic and assume that he has the whole thing under control because, you know, he’s Superman. But [[InferredHolocaust setting a half-dozen large fires throughout a neighborhood and then just walking away]] seems stupid.\\\
As he leaves, Superman comes across [[{{Glurge}} a magical white child]] who appears and offers him candy. Superman smiles, asks this random little kid [[ChildrenAreAWaste to deliver a message to the drug dealers for him (?!?)]]

-->--'''Chris Sims''', "17 Minutes Of Live-Action Anime/SailorMoon Life Lessons"

->Creator/JohnBarrowman, possibly the world’s greatest entertainer (he can sing, dance and present with equal aplomb) but [[TomHanksSyndrome not the world's most gifted actor]], finally gets his own drama to front and the results are variable at best. What baffles me about Barrowman is that on occasion he can bring his performance down to a very sensitive, mesmerising level but more often than not he chooses to overplay his dialogue and [[HamAndCheese murder a scene]]... It’s frustrating because the potential is there for him to be a fine leading man but he just needs somebody to whisper in his ear that he is playing the part a little too tongue in cheek at times. He’s a little like latter day Creator/TomBaker in that regard. Jack’s joke for everybody to ignore Gwen and go about their business as she [[YouGetMeCoffee stands there holding the pizza]] should work far more effectively than it does but the net result is that this crew seem even more conceited than they already did. Why does Jack spend an inordinate amount of time posing with his hands on his hips atop vertiginous buildings looking out across Cardiff? Surely he isn’t lording it over what he consider to be ''his'' town? And if so, wouldn’t have set his sights on [[KingOfTown something a bit sexier?]]

->In ''[[Creator/JMichaelStraczynski Superman #701]]'', our hero runs some black drug dealers out of a foreclosed neighborhood in which they’ve set up shop. (These are, it should be mentioned, [[UnfortunateImplications the first and nearly only black people]] he meets while walking through {{Philadelphia}}, a city with a higher proportion of African-Americans than New York City.) Superman’s brilliant strategy for getting rid of the drug dealers is to set fire to the drug stashes in each of their houses with his heat vision, and then… [[MissingStepsPlan leave]]. Now, I guess you can read the comic and assume that he has the whole thing under control because, you know, he’s Superman. But [[InferredHolocaust setting a half-dozen large fires throughout a neighborhood and then just walking away]] seems stupid.\\\

-->--'''Jason Michelitch''' on ''Superman: Grounded'', [[http://comicsalliance.com/worst-comics-2010-superman-grounded/ "The 5 Worst Comics of 2010"]]